Unsweetened Puns

Me: "Do we have any apple sauce?"
Dad: "Yeah."
Me: "Sweet."
Dad: "No, it's the unsweetened kind."

One of my dad's favorite jokes to pull on waiters/waitresses before he passed.

Waitress "Can I get you anything to drink?"

Dad "May I please have an unsweetened iced tea."

Waitress "Would you like a lemon with that?"

Dad "OH GOD NOT A WHOLE ONE!"

The look on the waitress's face was priceless every time.

My dad doesn't like coffee all that much and drinks a lot of iced tea, something I inherited from him. Anytime we're in a restaurant, and he orders an iced tea, the waiter or waitress always asks, "Sweetened or unsweetened?" To which my Dad replies, "Unsweetened, I'm sweet enough already."