Before his music career took off, Daryl Hall worked as a trucker for Quaker.

He was haulin’ oats.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Evanthekid16
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2021
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Trucker's Breakfast

A trucker came intoΒ  a Truck Stop CafΓ© and placed his order with the waitress. He said "I want three flat tires, a pair of headlights and a pair of running boards."

The brand new blonde waitress, not wanting to appear stupid, went to the kitchen and said to the cook, "This guy out there just ordered three flat tires, a pair of headlights and a pair of running boards. What does he think this place is, an auto parts store?"

"No," the cook said.Β  "'three flat tires' mean three pancakes; 'a pair of headlights' are two eggs sunny side up; and 'a pair of running boards' are 2 slices of crisp bacon!"

"Oh.. OK!" said the blonde. She thought about it for a moment and then spooned up a bowl of beans and gave it to the customer.

The trucker asked, "What are the beans for, Blondie?"

She replied, "I thought while you were waiting for the flat tires, headlights and running boards, you might as well gas up!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DrBobShelton_74
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2020
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Trucker: do you know what today is

Other Trucker: that a big 10-4

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dr_Sea_Chicken
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2020
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I think when this pandemic is over with, we need to have a day to celebrate truckers, for keeping the country running throughout all this. Maybe October 4th?

Call it the big 10-4.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ew0k5AN0nomi5
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2020
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A trucker called me on the cb today and asked what the date was.

I said "10/4, good buddy."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/WallyWest_77
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2019
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I'm a trucker. My dispatcher texted me to ask if I'd picked up a load of frozen toast. This was my response...

20,000lb of frozen bread so clearly I'm loafing along and a gluten for punishment.

Bad puns are the yeast of my problems. This load takes me to the upper crust, but if I don't get it in on time I'm toast!

Sorry about my rye sense of humor...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JimMarch
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25 2019
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I asked my trucker friend what today's date was

He replied ten four

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheNefelivata
πŸ“…︎ Oct 11 2019
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Two truckers decided to have a competition to see who had the faster truck...

The race was rigged.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2019
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What do you call an academic trucker?

A roads scholar.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/vacantstare
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2019
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What do truckers do when they get E.D.

They get a new peterbuilt

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πŸ‘€︎ u/skeeter-gunz
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2019
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I kept asking a trucker what today's date was...

Only thing he would say was, "10-4, good buddy"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FastnFleuryious
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2018
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What was the grain truckers favorite band?

Haulin' oats.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/neutral_cadence
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2017
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TIL that Daryl Hall and John Oates started out as long-distance truckers

They were haulin' oats

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πŸ‘€︎ u/furrthur
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2017
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What was the trucker's excuse when he was late with a shipment of computers?

"It was a hard drive"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Iscarpia87
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2017
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Trucker Dad Joke

Backstory: On a big truck a Super Single is a tire that is twice as wide as a traditional semi tire so you only need two tires per axle instead of four. My dad just bought a set for his truck.

Me: How are those Super Singles treatin' ya?

Dad: You should know, you are one!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MasterBruce88
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2014
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What do you call a truck towing a smaller truck?

A mother trucker

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πŸ‘€︎ u/decentname99
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2021
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Bus puns?

Friend of mine is going to be driving a bus around Australia, decked out motor home style. What are your best bus puns for a name?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/newybrewy
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2017
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What is the date today?

A man approached me today wondering if he could ask me what day it is?

10/4

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πŸ‘€︎ u/gregorymathewsjr
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2018
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If /puns were to host a fence building party according to the rules...

(This is more parody/satire than a pun, but I tried to make sure it had puns.)

  1. No more than half the people attending can wear trucker hats.

  2. The fences must be measured and spaced using meters. It doesn't matter if you're putting them in someone's yard.

  3. If you pull up a fence post, you cannot reuse it. In fact, you cannot use recycled posts from other people's yards.

  4. Don't keep up with the Jones'. But if you can't avoid this, make sure you give the Jones' the credit due for coming up with it first.

  5. You can bring lunch as sort of a potluck affair, but do not bring canned meat products from Hormel.

  6. If you bring a fence post, it must look like a fence post. If it might be confused with something else, make sure the box or protective wrapping calls it a fence post.

  7. When announcing the event, you are not allowed to make references to punch or people getting in line for punch. Just like Fight Club...

For now, we have no rule about promoting one stock car event over another as you work, or discussing other controversial matters. That won't change as long as you don't abuse this. Please keep your fence posts in good taste and suitable for all audiences. But if you do bring risque fence posts, make sure to cover them with a shroud labeled adult only, and I won't pull them up, provided the other rules are followed.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Spotted_Lady
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2018
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A valid excuse for being late...

I work in logistics and occasionally get great excuses for why truckers are late to deliver. Today a guy called in an explained he hit an alligator and blew out some tires. My buddy's response: "Sounds like he had a rare run in with the You'll Be Later Alligator. Unless it was actually an It'll Be Awhile Crocodile."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/anix421
πŸ“…︎ Jun 22 2018
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Apparently, my classmates are a conglomerate of dads

"what does a little bird inside a Computer do?"

"microchip"

"that is a hat, keep that in your head"

"what do they tell you when you live a seed bank?"

"thank you for coming"

"I never wanted to be a trucker, it never in-tir-ested me"

"Do you know why watches leave a mark on you wrist?"

"becouse the time is tight"

"life is like Battleship, today you ate, tomorrow C6"

Really, each joke is from a different classmate.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Makator
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2015
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