I tried donating blood today... NEVER AGAIN!!! Too many questions.

Like, "Who's blood is this?", "How did you get it?"

"Why is it in a bucket?"

πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TwoMoreDays
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2021
🚨︎ report
I tried googling tips to stop procrastinating but I ended up reading about photography

Turns out I can’t focus!

πŸ‘︎ 4k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2021
🚨︎ report
Have you ever tried blind-folded archery? No?

You don’t know what you’re missing.

πŸ‘︎ 156
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Archer_Boy9
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2021
🚨︎ report
Tried to take a selfie in the shower.

It turned out all blurry. I think I have selfie steam issues.

πŸ‘︎ 255
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AspenTD
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2021
🚨︎ report
Tried committing suicide last night...

Never doing that again, I could've killed myself!

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nagitoe_
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2021
🚨︎ report
I tried to make my login password "Beefstew"

But it wasn't stroganoff

πŸ‘︎ 340
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JazzPhobic
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2021
🚨︎ report
A girl named Autumn tried to prank me.

I didn’t fall for it!

πŸ‘︎ 581
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SlickHeadSinger
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2021
🚨︎ report
When I was in France I tried to climb a huge tower

But Eiffel off

πŸ‘︎ 150
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ArfanVAnulal
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2021
🚨︎ report
Someone tried to sell me a coffin today

I said that's the last thing I need

πŸ‘︎ 142
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DonPittelleone
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2021
🚨︎ report
My friend tried to steal a copy of "Free Fallin'" from a music store...

He was arrested for Petty theft.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BonsamBesuDMC2
πŸ“…︎ May 24 2021
🚨︎ report
I tried being a vegetarian...

But realized it was a big missed steak

πŸ‘︎ 32
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πŸ‘€︎ u/husapida
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2021
🚨︎ report
I tried to find a pun about carpentry

But nothing wood work

πŸ‘︎ 282
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πŸ‘€︎ u/yeahdog
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2021
🚨︎ report
Everyone tried so hard to figure out why Mr. Edwards changed his name to Mr. Evans

But after all these years, it's still a Mr. E

πŸ‘︎ 775
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πŸ‘€︎ u/eagleboy444
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07 2021
🚨︎ report
I tried catching fog today...

... too bad I mist

πŸ‘︎ 49
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/LegAcyCoolBro
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2021
🚨︎ report
I tried to think of a joke about superglue.

I got stuck.

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2021
🚨︎ report
I tried to talk to my doctor about circumcision

He just talked in circles

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/billbixbyakahulk
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2021
🚨︎ report
I tried to tell a joke about a guillotine

I didn't execute it properly

πŸ‘︎ 35
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/WalterNewton
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2021
🚨︎ report
I tried to mend my kids tricycle but gave up..

we were both just two-tyred

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Dinnen1
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2021
🚨︎ report
Have you ever tried to prepared bread?

There's no knead

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/G00DMUZIC
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2021
🚨︎ report
I tried to catch the fog one day

But I mist

πŸ‘︎ 33
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Godless902
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22 2021
🚨︎ report
I tried to come up with a pun about carpentry, but it’s harder than it sounds.

Almost nothing wood work.

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 17 2021
🚨︎ report
I tried to explain to my four-year-old son that it’s perfectly normal to accidentally poop in your pants, but he’s not buying it. In fact...

He’s still making fun of me...

πŸ‘︎ 88
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2021
🚨︎ report
I tried to find out what a proctologist was...

But I just couldn’t get to the bottom of it.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hedwig505
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2021
🚨︎ report
I tried to convince my wife to try this new Indian restaurant by telling her about the free appetizer.

She told me that was a naan starter.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jimgolgari
πŸ“…︎ May 28 2021
🚨︎ report
What did the yoga instructor say when their landlord tried to evict them??

Namaste.

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Cordur-Oy-Jones
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2021
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the girl who tried to smuggle drugs in her bra ?

Police said, it led to a bigger bust.

πŸ‘︎ 76
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2021
🚨︎ report
I tried making up a joke about unemployment...

...but it just didn't work.

πŸ‘︎ 31
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Vin135mm
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2021
🚨︎ report
I tried street racing once and lost.

I was out of breath after two blocks, but the street kept going for miles.

πŸ‘︎ 67
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Dr_Wheuss
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2021
🚨︎ report
I tried skipping rope. But I ended up being tied up.

That was knot my intention.

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SleepOrderDis
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2021
🚨︎ report
Anton LaVey tried to sign with a NBA team

But he was told he doesn't have a shot in hell.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheAzrael2013
πŸ“…︎ May 17 2021
🚨︎ report
A con artist tried to convince me he could ejaculate deli meat

What a load of bologna.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/gr33nphoenix
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2021
🚨︎ report
I Tried to Make a Dam out of Paper...

But the seepage was too hard to control.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Piano_Man72
πŸ“…︎ May 20 2021
🚨︎ report
Last year i went to paris and tried to climb the tallest building

But eiffel off

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dhruv572
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2021
🚨︎ report
I tried to tell my vaccinated friend a COVID joke.

But he didn't get it

πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/majestic_walrus1
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2021
🚨︎ report
Tried stealing a leg of lamb from the store

A staff asked me what I am doing with that. I replied, "Roasted with potatoes, vegetables and a lamb sauce would be great."

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheAzrael2013
πŸ“…︎ May 18 2021
🚨︎ report
Tried some viagra in the bedroom with my wife but it got stuck in my throat

I've had a stiff neck for a week

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Snozzcumberbatch
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2021
🚨︎ report
Someone tried to tell me a rabbit joke

I told them I don't carrot all for rabbit jokes

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/theskyguyuk
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2021
🚨︎ report
The Beatles tried recording an alphabet song....

But never made it past the Letter B Letter B Letter B Letter B

(Sing it you know you want to!)

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/LegoBSpace
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2021
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the cow that tried to jump a barbed wire fence?

Utter disaster.

πŸ‘︎ 137
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Super4rank
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2021
🚨︎ report
Last night, I tried sticking a torch to my scalp.

It made me feel very light- headed.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Bbew_Mot
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2021
🚨︎ report
I tried to make a joke about vaccines during the trump era

but no one got it.

πŸ‘︎ 49
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/IGotSkills
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2021
🚨︎ report
I tried to climb a really tall tower in France...

...but Eiffel off.

πŸ‘︎ 172
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/wtb2612
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2021
🚨︎ report
Have you ever tried blindfolded archery?

You don’t know what you’re missing

πŸ‘︎ 313
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AlabamaMayan
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2021
🚨︎ report
I tried to climb a really tall tower in France

But I Eiffel off

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Nickatier_Carbs
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2021
🚨︎ report
I have a friend who tried to take a selfie in the shower, but the image was too blurry.

He has selfie steam issues.

πŸ‘︎ 5k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/korabdrg
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2021
🚨︎ report
When I was in Paris I tried to climb this tall tower

But Eiffel Off

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Ginger-Beefcake
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2021
🚨︎ report
I tried to find a joke about carpentry

But nothing wood work

πŸ‘︎ 30
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Texgymratdad
πŸ“…︎ Apr 05 2021
🚨︎ report
So I tried catching some fog today..

Safe to say, I mist.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Doggo_AKA_JoeCool
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2021
🚨︎ report
I tried to climb a tall tower in France...

But then Eiffel off

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jk1445
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2021
🚨︎ report

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