They are both designed for little kids, but grown men end up playing with them.
He said, ‘Life is all about taking Risks’.
But I know he molded Plato.
She is a real mathmakitten
I guess she just tries to ASSert her dominance.
An armadildo..
Achew-toy
So he had to make every second Count.
That bear’s repeating.
…but his brother died, so they fired him.
At Toy Saurus
Fissure Price
Because they make all the toys.
Because they are stuffed
It's whichever one you're about to throw away.
Because he is unable to take a pooh
You should have seen her face light up.
Especially since they probably have the same names...
Dad: Nick is a great kid, I thought only BAD kids got Khol's for Christmas!
I actually said this one tonight and thought I'd share since my wife's eye roll was amazing.
Mom saying, “Go get Buzz and Woody.” takes on a whole new meaning.
Ever since we got home, she wont stop crying. I guess she's just a little melon collie.
What's a mix of Viagra and alcohol have in common with Toy Story?You get a buzz and a woody.
Is a small toy a toilet?
My supervisor at the toy factory said I was the worst employee they'd ever had.
https://preview.redd.it/h62wqcpqck491.jpg?width=480&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3b4ac5cd1c8e7b96c9e5659fe343e55fb13362f7
OK, this technically isn't a dad joke, but it is the first time I've ever seen one of the granddaddies of all dad jokes work in the wild.
I was in PetSmart buying kitty litter. There was one checkout line open and a lot of people waiting. The woman in front of me was getting rung up when one of her items, a dog toy, didn't ring up. Now my first thought is always ALWAYS to say "well, I guess it's free then." But I also know most checkout clerks have heard it a billion times, so I read the room and decide not to say it. The woman that is checking out starts to get flustered because she doesn't want to be rude and keep all the rest of us waiting in line. The manager comes out to help and find the price. The woman keeps getting more nervous and agitated. (My wife has social anxiety and I know what it looks like.) So I look at the woman and the clerk and say, "OK, we've tried the bar code, and checking the system for the price, has anyone said "Well, I guess it must be free then?" I mean that's the next step in the process, right?" The lady and the clerk both chuckle a bit and the tension is broken. The manager heard me say it and was like, "Yep, it's free." The lady looked at her and blinked. The manager repeated herself. And the woman took the toy and left.
IT WORKED PEOPLE!!! THE DAD JOKE WORKED!!!
An overworked elf walks into a bar and orders a beer. "What have you little guys been working on lately?" the bartender asks. "Today we worked on a new design on a special spinning toy," the elf says. "What's it called?" the bartender asks. "I can't tell you," the elf replies. "It's a top secret."
You can never find the barcode.
