The Annoying Orange Puns

To annoy a female housemate we were flicking bits of sweetcorn at her hair. In response, she escalated the game and threw an orange into my face.

The only way i got through the ordeal was because of what another of my housemates said next. After a long silence, as im holding my face he says "..hell hath no fury like a woman corned".

Was buying fruit with the girlfriend. She picked out some cripps pink apples. "Maybe we should be careful buying these. They might start a gang war with our blood oranges" Ziiing. She smiled, but I think I annoyed her by laughing about it for the rest of our shopping.

For starters, I'm allergic to orange peels. Peeling an orange, because asking someone to do it for me all the time gets annoying.

Boyfriend: You sure you should be peeling that with your hands?

Me: Did you want me to use my feet?