My dad was so cool and collected when he explained the tanker rupture to the president...

It was a slick performance.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ May 24 2020
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A jelly tanker overturned

It made a lot of traffic jam

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πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2019
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A tanker ship full of red and blue paint crashed into a shelf and sank

All the crew were marooned

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jacksoncranford
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31 2019
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There was a collision at sea between two tankers...one carrying blue paint, one carrying red paint.

There were no casualties but a number of crewmen were marooned.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ohsureyoudo
πŸ“…︎ Sep 30 2016
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Why did the man sleep under the tanker truck?

Because he wanted to wake up oily in the moining.

Thanks, Dad.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BanzaiTree
πŸ“…︎ Feb 17 2017
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BBC coming up with an atonicshing pun
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πŸ‘€︎ u/smallest_ellie
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2019
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Did you hear about the large petrol truck that liked to fix gadgets and children's toys?

It was just tankering.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mitfrenzy
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2019
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Got an eye roll from my wife for this one

How can you tell if a fuel tanker is bad? It's all full...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/z0rk5
πŸ“…︎ Feb 04 2017
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The best dad jokes are the ones you laugh at more than the audience...

I didn't come up with this but its been flying around reddit for a while...

A day before his 15th birthday, the son of a wealthy family was asked by his father, `Well my son, what would you like for your birthday?' The son hesitated a moment and his father's thoughts leapt ahead to a new computer and similar things. However, his son had had a new computer only recently and could have a new one any time he wished.

Finally, the son said, `Father, I have everything a boy could wish for, but there is one thing I would really like. I would love to have a pink ping pong ball.'

The father was rather astonished at this wish, but said, `If it is a pink ping pong ball that you want, a pink ping pong ball you shall have.'

And so, the next day, the son was given as his bithday present a pink ping pong ball.

The boy took the ball to his room and the next morning the pink ping pong ball was gone. The father was mildly surprised but decided not to say anything. The pink ping pong ball, however, was never seen again.

The next year, a day before his 16th birthday, the father asked his son what he would like for his birthday.

Father,' replied the son,I have everything a boy could possibly wish for, but there is one thing I would really, really like. I would love to have a tenpack of pink ping pong balls.'

The father was more surprised than the year before, but kept his curiosity at bay, for he knew that his son had a right for privacy. he said therefore, `If it is a tenpack of pink ping pong balls that you want, a tenpack of pink ping pong balls you shall have.'

And so, the next day, the son was given as his birthday present a tenpack of pink ping pong balls.

The boy took the tenpack of balls to his room and the next morning, not a single ball remained, merely the empty husk of the tenpack. The father wondered where ten pink ping pong balls might disappear to, but decided not to say anything. The pink ping pong balls, however, were never seen again.

The next year, a day before his 17th birthday, the son was asked by his father what he would like for his birthday.

Father,' said the son to this,I have everything a boy could wish for, but one thing would make my happiness complete. I would dearly want a carton of pink ping pong balls.'

The father was beyond surprise, but decided to make sure he had not misheard. `A carton of pink ping pong balls?'

`A carton of pink ping pong balls,' the boy confirmed.

I can't understand your fascination with pink ping pong balls

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Sven
πŸ“…︎ Oct 27 2013
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What's Red and smells like Blue Paint?

Red Paint.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/rush_dar
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2018
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Did you hear about the large petrol truck that liked to fix gadgets and mechanical toys?

He was just tankering.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mitfrenzy
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2019
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