A list of puns related to "Stained"
Something is telling me to ab-stain
It’s always looking sharp!
A pigeon just flew right into it.
That was a royal pane in the ass.
While the vest was waiting to be cleaned it had a chat with 2 other vests around it It said “ My owner stained me and I’m scared it won’t get off
One said “It’s going to be okay no need to worry”
The other one said “ Yeah it happens to the vest of us”
What a pane on the ass!
He replied with "yeah, the carpet."
Dad: Instead of "Hanes" they're "Stains"!
Me and family: Groans and laughing...
Is paintball a form of Enterstainment?
We need to solve it quickly. Send for Det. Urgent
We've tried everything, but it remains undie turd.
So I screamed at my shirt.
Liechtenstain.
So she decided to steel it
....just to watch him dye.
I think I'll sleep on it.
I said, "Why Shout, when we can Resolve it instead?"
Should I teller?
Mountain residew.
He let me know what it was when he replied, "grassy ass".
It is Ancient Grease.
So I say "of course, that's a great idea. That's really thinking outside the box."
I got punched.
A dried grape. Cause it's a raisin.
My wife said I lacked Resolve.
An Oximoron.
“Residoo-doo”
Son: Dad! I learned an awesome new trick at school in science class. Can I borrow your tie?
Dad: Let's see it.
Son: if we fold your tie in half, and roll the fat end toward the middle, and the thin end toward the middle, we have two rolls - one big and one small, both the same length, right?
Well, if I hold up the tie from the middle, and let go of both sides at the same time, which side will unroll first?
Dad: I have no idea.
Son (drops both ends, which open at the same time):
It's a tie, dad.
Because it has nothing to hide
They've been on shelves for quite a while now, you probably just never never noticed.
They're hard to spot.
I hate when she eats on the bed! Hot sauce stains, Woman!
That explained the stains next to it.
A Denmark.
No one ever under stained...
I had a stain on my shirt and I pointed it out.
Me: "Oh man I have a stain."
Friend: "Oh! Don't worry just use Shout and it will take it out."
I look down at it and scream very loudly towards it.
Me: "Yeah, that didn't work."
Oh the groans were perfect.
Because Dave must stain.
You could say that I am abstaining from ab staining...
A guy robbed a house and spilled some grape juice. Thankfully though, he managed to wipe it up before it left a stain.
I guess you could say it was a stainless steal.
Paul has a shitty life, his wife constantly berates him, his job sucks, his boss is a bully, his car is a shitty 85 ford pinto with a cracked windshield and is in bad need of a new transmission and to top it all off he's chubby, balding, and he has a small penis.
The only thing good in Paul's life is his friend Artie. Artie isn't the brightest bulb in the world, but he's always been there for Paul in the tough times. On October 5, 1953 Artie stood up for Paul against his bully in 7th grade. Artie got his ass handed to him at that time, but so did Paul. That incident resulted in a life long friendship. Paul and Artie went to the same High School together. They traveled around Europe that one summer in college. Artie was Paul's best man at his wedding. Everyone thought speech Artie gave was terrible, But Paul loved it Artie was his best friend.
Artie's life wasn't much better either, he never had the smarts for that great Job. In fact he was stuck in a dead end job as a construction labourer. Artie's car was pretty shitty too. Artie never married, but he was happy in the knowledge that at least he didn't end up with Paul's shitty wife.
For Paul's 46th birthday Artie was pretty broke, so all he could get his friend was a single lottery ticket. Artie being the sentimental guy that he was picked the date of the start of their friendship, and their respective ages (46, 45). Paul loved the present, and thought that the two of them should go to the Legion that friday to split a round of beers and listen to them call out the numbers.
On Friday they are both sitting there at the Legion having a laugh over a couple of beers when the cute lottery girl comes on the t.v. to read out the numbers. Paul pulls out the ticket and spreads it out on the beer stained table in front of them. The lottery girl starts reading out the numbers, 45, 10, 05. Both of Paul and Artie's hearts start beating, thats 200$ already. 53, Holy crap thats like a 10, 000 ticket. They both start losing their shit. 46....... Paul feints. He just won the jackpot. 37million dollars.
Two minutes later Artie finally revives Paul. Paul and Artie celebrate the night away, buy round after round for the people at the Legion and get absolutely shittered. They close out the bar and as the ugly lights come on they stumble blitzed, singing, onto the street arm in arm with the winning lottery ticket in hand and start the long walk back to Paul's place.
Halfway home, Paul comes to two drunken
... keep reading on reddit ➡Because he was ab staining.
Should I teller?
What fruit can you use to remove pencil stains from a wall? A dried grape. Cause it's a raisin.
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