He’s got the spirit
πŸ‘οΈŽ 146
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/According-Ad8779
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 29 2020
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The trail blazer lost his Christmas spirit.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 25
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/bev_err
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 25 2020
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My ex actually has 3 spirit animals:

Lion, Ass, Cheetah

πŸ‘οΈŽ 82
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/medimanager
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 11 2020
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Want to contact the spirit of a dead Italian ?

Use a Luigi board.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 25
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 11 2020
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He has good spirit though
πŸ‘οΈŽ 30
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Average-Fool
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 23 2020
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She fell in love with a spirit

She got ghosted

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Josentangles
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 20 2020
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What did the encouraging girl spirit say to the other ambitious girl spirit?

β€œYou ghost girl!”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/CryonicImmateriality
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 18 2020
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That's the spirit
πŸ‘οΈŽ 155
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/danieltan1502
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 15 2020
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Why don't spirits wear shoes?

Because they're...

...sole-less!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/weirdgroovynerd
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 25 2020
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Why witches should not ask underground spirits for an advice?

Because they live under the rock.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ChillySunny
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 02 2020
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I heard people are blaming imaginary evil spirits for Micheal Jackson's death.

Guess they're blaming it on the boogie.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Aniketraghav7
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 31 2020
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Sitting in the ER with my son last night, he got me with this one. I was trying to lift his spirits and was pointing out all the crazy equipment they have in the room. I said "Oh look. They have tongue depressers." He says "Those won't work on me." I asked why and he says...

"I'm on antidepressants."

He's going in for surgery at 3:30pm Pacific. All your positive thoughts and prayers are appreciated.

Edit: Thank you all for the kind words and omg for the gold! He's out of surgery and looks to be recovering nicely. All your well wishes helped cheer him and his parents up.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/thebikerdad
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 19 2019
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The immaculate conception? The Holy Spirit was in the womb where it happened.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/innerstrife
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 14 2020
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Where does a spirit of a cat live?

In the purrgatory.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/danielsoft1
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 10 2020
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I will hit the holy spirit into you if I have to.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 38
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Tj4y
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 03 2019
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Singer of Smells Like Teen Spirit
πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Darkathion890
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 24 2020
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In the spirit of sharing our kids attempts at dad jokes,

My daughter had to wire an essay about her hobby, which is softball. Her opener:

Pitcher this, you’re standing on a mound.

I was overwhelmed, and more proud than ever. She threw in some other puns too, it was an excellent essay, she’s giving me a run for my money, I batter watch out.

Edit: thank you u/PsychicGnome for the reminder that my kids are better parents than I am

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/OnionShanty
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 15 2020
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You know what would really lift my spirits these days?

If I integrated a gym into my liquor store.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/DoorHalfwayShut
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 07 2020
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After drinking mineral spirits...

I told the minerals to go home, they were drunk.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/mindfullsilence
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 14 2020
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What do you call a dwarven convict who can talk to spirits and escape prison?

A small medium at large.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Hufflestuff33
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 04 2020
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Lifting your spirits
πŸ‘οΈŽ 27
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/sketchb02
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 12 2019
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Lifting spirits!
πŸ‘οΈŽ 24
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/blazinfastjohny
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 24 2019
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What do you call the spirits of honey bees?

Boo-bees

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/kickypie
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 31 2020
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My brother took a test to see his animal spirit...

He couldn't bear the results

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Bro-mine
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 11 2020
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Getting into the holiday spirit with this Missile Toe I 3D Printed
πŸ‘οΈŽ 641
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/HumbertoL
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 22 2017
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My friend got attacked by a spirit

It got charged with a-soul-t

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/toban6273
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 29 2020
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Dont we all love the christmas spirit
πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/an-original-URL
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 29 2019
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I'm trying to get into the Christmas Spirit

But I just can't seem to open the bottle

πŸ‘οΈŽ 50
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Twigsnapper
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 17 2019
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The spirits have spoken... /r/AskOuija/comments/fdoq…
πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Satolah
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 05 2020
🚨︎ report
A Jim Beam warehouse caught fire, destroying 40,000 barrels of bourbon. Warehouse workers were reported to be in "low spirits."

Seriously though, terrible loss.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 19
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/relativelyben
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 03 2019
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When drinking spirits, it’s important to be responsible.

Otherwise you’re decisions could come back to haunt you.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 33
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/LyricalWillow
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 05 2019
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I relate to this on a spirit level
πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Girthquakenz
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 01 2019
🚨︎ report
What's Donald Trumps spirit animal?

A Wall-rus.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 28
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Pdonkey
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 22 2018
🚨︎ report
My spirit animal is the crocodile

I live in denial.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ElZoof
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 27 2019
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Do you guys know which album Smells Like Teen Spirit was on?

wait I got it, nevermind

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Hank_the_Hand
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 19 2019
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you shouldn't date spirits

they'll always ghost you

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/PdawgUltimate
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 02 2019
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Spirit Level, enough said.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/spinekar123
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 09 2019
🚨︎ report
A ghost walks through a bar and orders the Christmas Spirit.

The bartender says, "Sorry, but Christmas passed."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Helpful_Game_Artist
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 25 2019
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In the spirit of the season, here’s a meme I made years ago.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 26
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Otto-Erotic
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 25 2018
🚨︎ report
πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/DemonSlayerShadow666
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 04 2019
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Hyenas hate Spirit airlines.

The are too cheap to pay for carrion luggage.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/PdSales
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 31 2019
🚨︎ report
When I told my friend about my intention to stop drinking, he said β€œthat’s the spirit!”
πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/dubaidadjokes
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 13 2019
🚨︎ report
My spirit animal
πŸ‘οΈŽ 39
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/rasamson
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 14 2018
🚨︎ report
How do you summon an Italian Spirit?

With a Luigi Board.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 83
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/BlissedIgnorance
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 12 2020
🚨︎ report

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