So proud of my 6 year old. While teaching her to hit a softball, I told her to β€œsquare up on the ball”

She replied β€œthe ball is round daddy” (with a straight face) So I tell her β€œno, what I mean is, get mad! I want you to hit the ball really hard like if you were mad at it!”

She grabs the ball, stares right at it and says β€œI’M REALLY DISAPPOINTED IN YOU, BALL!” Then throws it right back at me.

Proud dad moment.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Itsjorgehernandez
πŸ“…︎ Jun 23
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This just happened at a softball game and didn’t get the props it deserved.

My son was playing with a fly. It’s wings were messed up so it couldn’t fly away. He was holding it and said, β€œDaddy, this fly’s wings are broke.” I said, β€œthen it’s not a fly, it’s a walk.”

I got utter silence from the people around me, though my daughter giggled a little.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/UmraTiwil
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20
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Why did Cinderella get cut From the softball team?

She kept running away from the ball.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/labink
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2019
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Who calls balls and strikes at the annual Vatican softball game?

The Holy Roman Umpire!

... sorry.

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/yeowvan
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2015
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softball player get a music deal?

Why did the softball player get a music deal? -Her first single was a hit!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/euwrank3262
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2018
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My 80yo Grandma threw me a softball...
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wefeedu
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2018
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A coach at softball practice said, "where did my bat go?" I said...

... maybe it flew away.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/197708156EQUJ5
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2018
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Why can't you trust a softball pitcher?

Because they use underhanded tactics.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Maimonides_vii
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2016
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In the spirit of sharing our kids attempts at dad jokes,

My daughter had to wire an essay about her hobby, which is softball. Her opener:

Pitcher this, you’re standing on a mound.

I was overwhelmed, and more proud than ever. She threw in some other puns too, it was an excellent essay, she’s giving me a run for my money, I batter watch out.

Edit: thank you u/PsychicGnome for the reminder that my kids are better parents than I am

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πŸ‘€︎ u/OnionShanty
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15
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My son just asked me, "Can we pick my friend up?"

Me: I dunno. How heavy is she? Son: In a car dad

This happened only moments ago. You can't just softball 'em in like that, son.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/89iroc
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19
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Me: Dad I have bats in my attic

Dad: baseball or softball?

Real life encounter with my dad. The legends are true. Dad jokes prevail.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/crisp-high-five
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25 2019
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I was casually interviewed by an athletics coach today.

He asked a lot of softball questions.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/conundrumbombs
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2019
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I made a dad joke I'm proud of last night...

I was watching my friend's softball game last night, sitting with his wife as their two twin 4-ish-year-old daughters ran around. One of them was intent on finding the crickets that were chirping all night. Finally she runs up to us and says "I hear the crickets over there. I'm going to go look for them!"

As she runs off I say "Watch, all she'll find over there is a bad comedian."

Forgive me, it's a problem.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kr580
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2014
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Daughter gave me a taste of my own jokes tonight.

We are driving home from softball practice i was telling her about christian betancourt, the padres catcher who is going to be used as a pitcher. He will be the first guy in many many years to pitch and catch on the same team.

She looks at me straight faced and asks.....wait so you're saying hes going to pitch and catch at the same time?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/succaneers
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2017
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Murder dadjoke.

Out with some friends, when one says "I just read that a couple of teenagers killed a cow with softballs" the others that were with us agreed with the girl who said how horrible it was. Then I said, with a smirk "I guess you could say that was a mooorder" Everyone facepalmed at once, as the girl said "oh goodness gracious".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jesusdo
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2014
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I think this may qualify, even though it was before I was a dad, and it wasn't really a joke.

'Interactive lecture' in a Systems Engineering class (not that that's relevant) when the Assistant Professor starts directing questions to the students to move forward in the lecture material.

Settles on me and asks me a pretty straightforward question that I started overthinking and got all deer-in-the-headlight-y.

Fancies himself some sort of comedian so he quips "C'mon, I'm throwing you a softball (question)."

To this I come up with an immediate response: "I don't play softball."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LickItAndSpreddit
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10 2015
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Teacher dadjoked an athlete

The girl plays softball and had recently jad a game so he was talking to her about it:

Teacher: So what position do you play?

Student: I play first and second base and right field.

Teacher: Wow you must be really fast to play all of those positions in a game

Confusion and groans ring out among the students surrounding her and they proceed to stare at me as I chuckle in my seat.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kiefgarrett
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2014
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