Smelled Puns

Used the wrong flower

So we did it squid pro quo

He was a cinnamon bum.

Ofcourse it does! With my salary I can't afford any Champagne!

They loved chalk lit.

How’d you get their little legs apart?

"Whew, what a skink!"

How did you get their little legs open?

He was de odor ant.

I can't get their tiny legs spread apart far enough.

My porking brake was on.

It was absolutely pootrid.

Badumm tss.

She gave me the stink eye as she recoiled away.

As I was grabbing a plate, she said, "It's nacho casserole."

I hung the plate behind my side and lamented, "If it's not my casserole, what am I supposed to eat?"

She started to tell me to eat some of the casserole, but stopped and rolled her eyes at me.

I frickin got'er good, fellas!

...and soon grew and sold thousands to florists around the world. He called the flowers Nomasia, both singular and plural. Soon, almost every field and house had Nomasia.

One day a man was found dead with Nomasia in his hand and a joke written on his shirt. A detective arrived at the scene and instantly saw the pun on the dead man's clothes. "What's that?" he asked an officer nearby. The officer answered, "Oh, that's just a pair o' Nomasia."

But I could never get their tiny little legs apart

I think the break-in was pre-meditated.

A fragrant foul

He said, "I dunno, I guess with their beaks."

I found some other good ones on this video chain of dad jokes on hoop.

It made me pine for the woods.

"Yeah... Hasn't everybody? Why do you ask?"

"I was just wondering how you got their legs to spread apart?"

I said, "They don't smell bad, just not very appealing."

Hoof hearted?

So, I work with a woman named Libby who is finally retiring in two days. It's no secret that she has a crush on Dwayne Johnson, so as a parting gift/joke some other coworkers bought a figurine, a wall poster, and a life-size cardboard cutout of him and put them at her desk.

When I was visiting her, her manager swung by to see her 'guest,' and he asked if the celebrity was going to be staying in the office. Libby said "Oh no no--he's coming home with me!" He says, "Huh. I thought the pet rock fad died out thirty years ago."

He tried to play it cool, but it was pretty easy to tell that he was absolutely tickled with himself.

How do you get their tiny legs apart?

How'd you get their little legs apart?

How do you pull their little legs open?

Yes? How did you get their little legs apart?

How did you get his legs apart?

Yeah? How'd you get your nose between their little legs?

And if so, how'd you get their little legs open?

How'd you get their little legs apart?

Did you hold them by the wings?

how did you get his little legs apart?

How did you get their legs apart?