What did the left eye say to the right eye?

Between you and me, something smells.

👍︎ 461
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📅︎ Jun 20 2019
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A man attacked me with cheese and milk today

How dairy?!

👍︎ 36
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📅︎ Jan 30 2018
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I'm trying to quit my addiction to smelling saliva.

The whiff drool symptoms are terrible.

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👤︎ u/TommehBoi
📅︎ Jul 19 2019
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I was at the Tigers game last night

I was sitting in some beautiful seats, just past third base down on ground level. A good spot for some foul balls.

After several whiffs, one finally gets close enough to my father, which he promptly takes in the ribs instead of catching, and like before, the bat boy runs by to pick up the ball - only this time he doesn't throw it back into the crowd. Makes our whole section upset (that, and all the beer we were drinking) so he gets booed every time he walks by now.

The dad joke, however, comes from the guy behind me.

"That kid better watch out...I'm gonna talk to his dad. Batman!"

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👤︎ u/d4ed4e
📅︎ Sep 17 2013
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What's the difference between a pun and an odor?

A pun is a shift of wit, an odor is a whiff of shit.

👍︎ 3
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📅︎ Feb 22 2016
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