18 Hilarious Significant Other Puns

A woman is on trial for beating her significant other with a guitar. “First offender?” the judge asked.

“No” she replied. “First a Gibson , then a Fender”

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👤︎ u/justbeatitTTD

📅︎ Dec 03 2020

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My significant other asked why I never take them out

I said that the scope is broken on my high powered rifle

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👤︎ u/MrPeanut76

📅︎ Jan 31 2021

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What do pandas call their significant other?

Their Bam-boo.

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👤︎ u/PsyBookNerd

📅︎ Jun 24 2020

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My significant other

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👤︎ u/vaselv4evr

📅︎ Mar 04 2020

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Hey dads, get your significant other one of these for valentine's day!

https://imgur.com/VpQ80W3

I know my wife loves a boo-K.

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👤︎ u/surfrock66

📅︎ Feb 11 2020

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Just wanted to remind everyone of all the hard work the significant others of superheroes do. They deal with so much, have to be in their shadow, yet still stand by them...

They really are fucking heroes

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👤︎ u/Uingsz

📅︎ May 05 2019

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Local punster attempts motivating significant other with puns

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👤︎ u/thefizzynator

📅︎ Dec 28 2017

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I took my significant other out on a date to the ice rink.

Entry was half price.

She called me a cheap skate.

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👤︎ u/ScottyUrb

📅︎ Nov 19 2018

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What do you call a significant other you met online?

e-Bae

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👤︎ u/Krackarock

📅︎ Jul 23 2018

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How does your former significant other have food delivered?

Fed-Ex

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👤︎ u/narf007

📅︎ Nov 17 2017

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My significant other was not a fan,

Me: what did the Ocean say to the other Ocean?

Her: What?

Me: Nothing they just waved... Sea what I did there?

Her: groans* I hate you (jokingly)

Me: Why are you so salty about it? don't be such a beach.

EDIT: she actually laughed pretty hard after that.

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👤︎ u/lowdownporto

📅︎ Apr 29 2014

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One of the best ever Dad Jokes, from the thread on parents knowing if their kid's significant other was "the one" reddit.com/r/AskReddit/co…

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👤︎ u/jkonine

📅︎ Oct 30 2013

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My wife treats me like a baby, both in the bedroom and out.

She's my significant other mother.

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline

📅︎ May 18 2020

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I absolutely cannot understand polyamory.

Why would you want >1 significant other yelling at you for loading the dishwasher wrong?

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👤︎ u/OratioFidelis

📅︎ Mar 10 2019

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This belongs here.

My favorite memory of my parents is going to some...

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ar90mx/whats_the_dumbest_thing_your_significant_other/eglz2pb?utm_source=reddit-android

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👤︎ u/Saskatoon_sasquatch

📅︎ Feb 17 2019

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Buddy's wife works for the Census Bureau. He calls her...

"...my statistically significant other."

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👤︎ u/cummy_ant_sock

📅︎ Nov 08 2018

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Post breakup dad jokes can hurt... But damn they can be funny..

Significant other recently dumped me to heal some personal life issues alone. Call the family and explain the situation, tell them that bf was sadly a recovering drug addict.

Go home to enjoy a mom daughter weekend. Bad dad joke ensues.

Dad calls: What are you and your mom up to today? Me: We just finished a manicure pedicure session. Dad: I thought you just got rid of one of those? Me: ...what?.. Dad: A man-to-cure. Me: .....Face palm. Okay dad... That was pretty good.

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👤︎ u/schatraw10

📅︎ Jun 04 2015

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I was dad joked by a customer today.

I work at Goodwill, and while I was working register a customer came up to pay.

He placed a frying pan on the counter, and casually said, "Hey man. What's cooking?"

His significant other just rolled her eyes and walked off. We laughed like maniacs.

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👤︎ u/waitn2drive

📅︎ Mar 26 2014

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