Severe Puns

A list of puns related to "Severe"

Two men were caught in a severe storm

John saw a tornado out the window of Frank’s house and said to Frank

“Jesus man! that’s an F5! We gotta get to cover Frank!”

Tornado rapidly approaches within 100 yards

John was looking for the cellar door and found 2 different ones

“For Fuck’s sake Frank which is the best cellar!?”

With the tornado bearing down on them, Frank sprang into action and grabbed the latest James Patterson novel.

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👤︎ u/dudemansick
📅︎ Feb 09 2021
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My doctor just diagnosed me with a severe lack of awareness.

Man! That came out of nowhere!!

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👤︎ u/amar610
📅︎ Oct 26 2020
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Apparently there is a severe shortage of doulas around the world...

It's a real mid-wife crisis!

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👤︎ u/scrollholio
📅︎ Oct 08 2020
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Having severe throat pain

Must be because Ice-cream a lot.

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👤︎ u/wassup369
📅︎ Oct 07 2020
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I used to have a severe addiction to soap

I'm clean now

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👤︎ u/Brosthetic
📅︎ Aug 22 2020
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My mate Gav sadly passed away this morning. Doctors say it was severe heart burn.

Cannot believe Gaviscon

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👤︎ u/schwifty98
📅︎ Aug 10 2020
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My wife and I were recently hospitalized for very severe, persistent headaches. After a few hours of testing and waiting

I informed my wife that we had ourgrains

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👤︎ u/linknt01
📅︎ May 06 2020
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Stadiums across the country are experiencing severe overheating

Experts say its the lack of fans.

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👤︎ u/Loosebutt
📅︎ Jun 30 2020
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I’ve recently developed a severe phobia of elevators.

I’m taking steps to avoid them.

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👤︎ u/ENJOYblet
📅︎ Jul 20 2019
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Doctor: You have a severe iron deficiency. Me: How did you know? I just walked in!

Doctor: Your shirt is all wrinkled.

👍︎ 6k
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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Aug 02 2018
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Did you know that there is a severe lack of properly sourced info about whales?

[cetacean needed]

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👤︎ u/this_time_i_mean_it
📅︎ Apr 04 2020
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I once got severe pain in my head from inhaling too much of steam.

It was a big mist-ache

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👤︎ u/x_amxxn_x
📅︎ Mar 11 2020
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Where does a female sheep with severe hypothermia go?

The ICU.

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👤︎ u/the_friendly_one
📅︎ Dec 01 2019
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My pet viper swallowed a sheet of window glass causing the snake severe physical discomfort.

It was a real pane in the asp.

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👤︎ u/DreadMoor
📅︎ Dec 20 2019
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Doctor: Did you know that you have a severe inability to vocalize your emotions?

Me: “I can’t say I’m surprised.”

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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Jan 20 2019
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Did you guys hear about that monkey with severe digestive issues?

The shit was bananas

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👤︎ u/breauxdle
📅︎ May 01 2017
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I’m applying shaving cream everyday because of my severe santaphobia.

I heard it protects you from nicks.

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👤︎ u/NotSoFr0sty
📅︎ Nov 24 2018
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I'm so mad that I've got severe burns this morning because the smoke detectors didn't work.

I'm still fuming!

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👤︎ u/CFDMoFo
📅︎ Jun 19 2018
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Severe withdrawal from not reading Mark Twain

Delirium Clemens

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👤︎ u/brainbanana
📅︎ Mar 16 2013
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Sherlock Holmes: doctor, i i have severe constipation.

Doctor: No shit Sherlock?

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👤︎ u/that_introverted_guy
📅︎ Aug 06 2014
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Some time in the future, after Michael Bluth became a web developer, he started experiencing severe narcolepsy

Apparently he was suffering from arrested development.

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👤︎ u/AnOrnateToilet
📅︎ Oct 09 2017
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A man would experience severe pain in his eye every time he drank tea[X-Post from r/jokes]

He went to his doctor, who referred him to an eye specialist. They performed every test possible, but found nothing wrong with his eye. Since the pain was still persistent, he showed a number of specialists, had every test done on him, consulted quacks, and all to no result. He still felt excruciating pain whenever he had tea. Finally, he decides to visit an old sage. The sage sits him down and pours him some tea. As soon as he takes a sip, he feels the pain again. The sage sets his own cup on the table, and quietly says "Next time you drink tea, remember to remove the spoon from the cup."

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👤︎ u/gulzaar
📅︎ Aug 20 2014
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My doctor diagnosed me with severe lack of observation.

That came out of nowhere.

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👤︎ u/Rav4xle
📅︎ Jun 05 2020
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Doctor: I think you have severe iron deficiency. Me: How do you know?? I just walked in!

Doctor: Your clothes are all wrinkled.

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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Jan 25 2020
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Doctor: I think you have severe iron deficiency.

Man: How do you know? I just walked in!

Doctor: Your clothes are all wrinkly.

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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Jul 18 2019
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I've recently developed a severe phobia of elevators.

I'm taking steps to avoid them.

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👤︎ u/keithasaurus
📅︎ Aug 01 2018
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The doctor said to me, “You have a severe iron deficiency.” Baffled, I asked, “How do you know? I just walked in!”

He sighed, “Your shirt is all wrinkled.”

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👤︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
📅︎ Jan 24 2019
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My doctor just diagnosed me with a severe lack of awareness.

That came out of nowhere.

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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Jul 27 2018
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