I’ve just been charged for using sandpaper to kill my victim.

I only wanted to rough him up a bit.

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👤︎ u/Anytime200
📅︎ Mar 03 2021
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when I was a child we were so poor that my mother made us clothes out of the scraps my dad would bring home from work at the sandpaper factory

It was rough.

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👤︎ u/Kinkybenny
📅︎ Dec 24 2020
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My son stole some sandpaper

It wasn't a serious crime, so the judge imposed the medium fine, payable in due coarse.

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👤︎ u/wcskjb
📅︎ Nov 17 2020
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I've been charged with murdering a man with sandpaper.

But, to be honest, I just intended to rough him up a bit.

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👤︎ u/VERBERD
📅︎ Nov 01 2020
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Proud dad moment - Dad what type of sandpaper does the dog use?

Woof ones

5 year old daughters joke, so proud :)

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👤︎ u/MrWulf360
📅︎ Nov 23 2020
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I was charged with accidentally killing a man with sandpaper.

I didn't mean too. All I wanted to do was rough him up a bit.

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📅︎ Jul 31 2020
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I’ve just been charged for killing a man using sandpaper

In my defence I only intended to rough him up a little bit

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📅︎ Jul 04 2020
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"Dad, do you have any rough sandpaper?" My son asked.

"Of coarse I do," I replied.

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📅︎ Jun 16 2020
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I was able to salvage some sandpaper from my wood shop fire...

But it was in rough shape.

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📅︎ Sep 08 2020
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I used to have a calendar that was normal except September 11 was made of sandpaper.

That was a rough day.

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📅︎ Mar 10 2020
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Why did the student not learn anything at Sandpaper Class?

The class had just scratched the surface!

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📅︎ Apr 08 2020
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I saw my dog walk over sandpaper

He said rough rough

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👤︎ u/paoerfuuul
📅︎ Feb 07 2020
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Why would you take sandpaper to the desert?

So you can have a map.

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📅︎ Aug 15 2019
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I presented a piece of sandpaper to my dog.

My dog said "ruff"

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📅︎ May 21 2019
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My wife sent me an article about "sandpaper spouses..."

I told her she must be 2000 grit, 'cause she's FINE!

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📅︎ Feb 25 2016
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What did the dog say when it sat on the sandpaper?

Rough

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📅︎ Sep 28 2018
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I was arrested this morning for trying to kill a man with sandpaper,

which is ludicrous, I was only trying to rough him up a little.

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📅︎ Mar 31 2018
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I've got a great recipe for "Sandpaper Cookies" ...

... they're made from scratch.

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👤︎ u/GameDevFox
📅︎ Jan 13 2019
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My friend asked me if they should buy a phone made of sandpaper.

I'm not sure. It's a tough call.

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👤︎ u/vaxis2113
📅︎ Oct 03 2018
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It sounds super fun to work for a sandpaper company

Every goal is just sellabrasion

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👤︎ u/ej1oo1
📅︎ Jul 03 2017
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Why did the employee quit his job at the sandpaper factory?

It was rough.

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📅︎ Dec 09 2016
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Sandpaper

On the phone with my dad and he dropped this one... "I got some sandpaper for the dog and asked how it felt. He said ruff." My dad then began to laugh at his own joke.

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📅︎ Oct 03 2013
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Why did the student not learn anything at Sandpaper Class?

The class had just scratched the surface!

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👤︎ u/corbambino
📅︎ Apr 13 2019
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Ive been charged with murder for killing a man with sandpaper

I only intended to rough him up abit

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📅︎ May 08 2019
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