Bridesmaid Proposal Puns for a Doctor and a Lawyer?
I am asking two of my girlfriends to be my bridesmaids and wanted to word the question in a punny way related to their careers- one is a first-year medical resident and the other is a law student. I would like to flatter them/make it funny. Any and all ideas are appreciated!! If there is a better sub to ask this question please let me know:))
Request: going into business as a wedding celebrant, looking for business name suggestions that are punny and memorable
Request for a pun with the word Brook
Please let me know if this kind of post isn't allowed but I wasn't sure where to ask. I'm looking for puns including the word Brook. Even better if it's plural (brooks).
What did rosemary say when sage proposed?
Why did the fan say no to Paul McCartney’s marriage proposal?
Because it could only oscillate horizontally
Why did a father who's son was just born today refused a marriage proposal of a father who's daughter was born just the previous day?
He didn't want his son marrying a girl twice his age.
A man in my gym just proposed and she said no.
They didn’t workout.
Edited: It changed to they.
Thanks lornstar7
A friend of mine planned to use balloons to propose to his internet girlfriend, but then they finally met face to face.
He immediately popped the question.
My son proposed to his girlfriend while they were at the gym and she said no...
I guess they didn't work out!
I bought an imitation diamond engagement ring to propose to my Irish girlfriend on St Patrick's day. I just hope she doesn't notice..
I proposed to my girlfriend, who is the VP of marketing at her company.
Hi there, I'm Buzz Aldrin, the second person to ever walk on the moon..
I got banned from /r/DadJokes for posting, "Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms! Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms! Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms! Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms! Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms! Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms!"
Mods said I'm a cereal reposter...
In light of his record with these mega-projects, Elon Musk's proposed new Miami-tunnel gives new meaning to the term
"car-pool tunnel syndrome."
Woman turned down the marriage proposal of a gardener. She wasn't ready to shear her life with him.
For my birthday my brother bought me an elephant for my room.
I said "Thanks." He said "Don't mention it."
Two larger women walked into a bar and requested drinks in a hard UK accent.
The bartender asked are you ladies from Ireland?
The girls smiled and said Wales.
The bartender replied are you two whales from Ireland?
I wanted to go to the local aquarium to see the new dolphin show, but when I got there I couldn’t get in.
It was closed for training porpoises.
I have a pun for you guys, it’s a one liner
Before you say yes to a proposal, there is one thing you have to consider
On one hand, you get a really nice ring, but on the other hand, you won't.
Not a joke for written context, but one you can use on your family.
You just say to your family member - "Did you hear someone in the family is part owl?"
They'll reply with "who?" And you look at them with a raised eyebrow.
Tell this joke over dinner if youd like to be the life of the party. You're welcome.
Why did the farmer request a divorce?
A man is being taken to the gallows for his execution. The executioner asked if he had any last requests, and he asked for a high five.
The executioner left him hanging.
my grandfather said this today on the dinner table and i was the only one that found it hilarious for no reason at all
G : what type of apples grow on trees ?
my dumbass : idk red and green ?
G : all of them do
wheezes
T-shirt is actually short for tyrannosaurus shirt
It’s because of the small arms
Today I learnt what Yoda was short for,
Because he's got little legs.
Not sure if OP was going for a pun
A friend of mine is quite well known for sweeping girls off their feet.
He’s an extremely aggressive janitor.
The police arrested a dog for giving birth on the street.
Nade is buying meat for your proposal surprise party.
Perfect for the kids - what do you call a bear with no teeth?!
I saw male wigs on sale for $1
It’s a small price toupee
(Warning: Morbid dad joke) True Story -- My family were planning my mum's funeral. We always try to keep things light and try to stay positive, just as Mum would have it...
The funeral director was asking us what we think Mum should wear in her casket.
Mum always loved to wear sarongs (fabric wraps that go around the torso and drape downward a bit like a long skirt would), so my uncle suggested that she wear a sarong in there.
The funeral director looked a bit confused, as did some of our family members, to which my uncle added:
"What's sarong with that?"
I started laughing like an idiot. He was proud of it too. The funeral director was rather shocked. We assured her, and our more proper relatives, that Mum would've absolutely loved the joke (which is very true).
His delivery was perfect. I'll never forget the risk he took. We sometimes recall the moment as a way help cushion the blows of the grieving process.
--Edit--
I appreciate the condolences. I'm doing well and the worst is behind me and my family. But thanks :)
--Edit--
Massive thanks for all the awards and kind words. And the puns! Love 'em.
I gave my daughter a watch for her birthday. She thought it was so cool and when she showed it to the next door neighbor, he asked, "That's a pretty watch you've got there! Does it tell you the time?"
She laughed and said, "No, this is an old-fashioned watch! You have to look at it!"
They renamed the charger for the iphone.
Now they just call it apple juice.
Wife says I won’t get 5 upvotes for this, but... Did you hear the one about the dog and the tree?
They had a long conversation about bark.
Edit: Y'all are nuts! We're somewhere north of 10k upvotes now, so I'll direct any remaining attention to Boot Camp for New Dads.
REQUEST : Need help with a punny (sorry) construction site related safety slogan
I have to make a slogan for safety week at a construction site I work at. Can you guys help?
I went to an Indian restaurant last night for some garlic bread.
I grilled a chicken for two hours.
It still wouldn't tell me why it crossed the road...
Asked my contractor why he didn’t bill me for my new roof
He said “Don’t worry about it, it’s on the house!”
Just had an officer at the door saying he was looking for a man with one eye...
Told him to use both and he’d probably find him a lot quicker.
I forgot to post this on Pi Day. Oh well! The Argyle Sweater for 3/14/21
If Chewie is short for Chewbacca, and Ben is short for Obi Wan, what is Luke short for?
After being single for years, my best friend said, "Can I set you up?
I said "Go on then!!"
Now I'm doing 12 years for a crime I didn't commit.
It’s kind of sad that Christianity, Judaism, and Islam have been fighting each other for centuries.
Hindus, on the other hand, never had any beef.
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