Inmates at HMP Manchester are refusing to eat the Moroccan spiced chicken dish they're given every Friday, claiming it is being used to secretly medicate them with aggression-suppressants hidden in the sauce.

That sounds to me like one of those cons' piri piri theories.

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2021
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If a child is refusing to go to bed

Are they resisting a rest?

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πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2020
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Last night at dinner, we were eating sushi, so I asked my wife, "What do you call refusing to incriminate your salmon?"

She swung and missed (getting to "Pleading the fifth" before eventually ending up at "Salmon the fifth?").

Then my 5-year-old daughter asked, "What was the first word you said?" and when told it was "Pleading," she said, "It would be 'Pleading the FISH'!"

I've never been so proud of her.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JoshSamBob
πŸ“…︎ Jun 26 2020
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I started a garden and the basil is refusing to grow.

It’s being such a pesto.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CodyClay1
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2020
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There are reports that, because of the covid outbreak, Rick Astley is hoarding copies of a 2009 Pixar film, and all albums by a southern metal band from New Orleans. He is not allowing anyone to borrow them. It's also said that Mr. Astley is refusing to go out and purchase cake for others.

To summarize:

He's never gonna give you Up

Never gonna lend you Down

Never gonna run around, and dessert you.

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πŸ“…︎ Mar 23 2020
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Did you hear about the three year old arrested for refusing to take a nap?

He was resisting a rest.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/seausi
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2020
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To keep the virus away, I'm taking forever to open the door, refusing to change the temperature and only playing games in single player mode.

In other words, I'm doing everything I can to be a bad host.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/karmaniak
πŸ“…︎ Mar 24 2020
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If a child is refusing to take their nap or go to bed... can I call the cops on them?

Technically they are resisting a rest!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/EvilWebMistress
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2020
🚨︎ report
Why is Robert Downey Jr refusing to take new roles?

Cause he's Dolittle now.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dori_lukey
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2020
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Police were called to a day care to investigate a 3yo who was refusing to take a nap

They charged him with resisting a rest

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KetoNun
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2019
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My son got sent to jail for refusing to take a nap

He was resisting a rest

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πŸ‘€︎ u/euratowel
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2019
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I was sick and tired of my wife refusing to have sex with me.

So I took matters into my own hands...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Golden5StarMan
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2019
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My son was refusing to eat dinner, so I tried to force feed him.

My wife said, β€œUse the fricking spoon. You are not a Jedi.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 06 2019
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The hot air balloon driver is refusing to come down, and the cops are still trying to figure out why.

Everything is still up in the air.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2019
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What do you call it when a janitor is fired for refusing to unclog the restroom toilets?

Dereliction of doodie.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/boogerknows
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2019
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My wife was trying to feed our son a pear, and he was refusing.

I said, Good news. Our son is immune to pear pressure.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2017
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Did you hear abou the guy thrown in prison for refusing to take a nap?

He was resisting a rest

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fisteves
πŸ“…︎ May 17 2019
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Some Decepticons are refusing to have their kids vacuumed

because they believe the new car smell causes autoism.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Turtle_Sweater
πŸ“…︎ Mar 07 2019
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There is one animal in the ocean that marine biologists are refusing to release any date on. Apparently, it’s a sea crit.
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πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2018
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Mike Tyson is refusing to support Playstation.

...because he's an X-Boxer.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kahne_Fan
πŸ“…︎ Aug 29 2016
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They Stared at me from the Couch, Refusing to Acknowledge What I had Done

We were ordering chinese food and deciding on what to get.

My dad: Pick a chinese dish you'd like to eat for tonight.

Me: I'd rather not honestly, they're so hard and porcelain. I don't think I'd like to eat a chinese dish tonight.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ReadShift
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2014
🚨︎ report
If your toddler is refusing to take a nap…

Are they resisting a rest?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/agaconn
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15 2020
🚨︎ report
I had to call the cops on my son for refusing to take a nap.

He resisted a rest.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VeryLastBison
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2019
🚨︎ report
If a child is refusing to take a nap.

Is it resisting a rest?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Idrvfastt
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2018
🚨︎ report
My daughter is refusing to nap

She's resisting a rest

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MageKorith
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2018
🚨︎ report

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