After mathematicians wondered for many years about the rational numbers, they realised there's more!

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π€︎ u/jeetsampat
π︎ Mar 17 2021
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My son asked me whether Ο was a rational number, even though he knows i didnt go to school...

I mean that's just not rational.

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π€︎ u/HertzMcGertz
π︎ Jul 28 2020
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Thatβs a rational expression.
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π€︎ u/chocolaterush
π︎ Mar 22 2019
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"Dad, I know about real numbers, natural numbers and rational numbers. But what are imaginary numbers?"

"It's the numbers you use to call your imaginary girlfriend."

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π€︎ u/kuroha_zone
π︎ Oct 01 2019
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Why are musicians such rational people?

Because they always make sound decisions.

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π€︎ u/OiTheRolk
π︎ Nov 29 2018
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Reich Rationer is the best
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π€︎ u/ArvasuK
π︎ Feb 04 2021
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My girlfriend is a square root of -100

Perfect 10, but purely imaginary.

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π︎ Mar 27 2021
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Yummy 3.14159
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π€︎ u/amirlopez
π︎ Mar 14 2021
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Found guilty on all charges, the train couldn't rationalize his off-the-wall behavior.

It was a loco motive.

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π€︎ u/jeromocles
π︎ Aug 03 2020
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The Costco employee said "I'm sorry Sir, we're rationing.

[Looking over cart full of TP]

Me: "Nice to meet you Rationing, I'm Hoarding"

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π€︎ u/robinson217
π︎ Mar 13 2020
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Bop
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π€︎ u/TelepathicPsych
π︎ Jul 28 2020
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Why did the sushi chef go to the capitol riots?

To protest the Unagi Ration.

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π︎ Jan 17 2021
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I speak in simplified fractions

Half of what I say makes sense

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π€︎ u/DongLongus
π︎ Oct 16 2020
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There is a fine line between the denominator and the numerator

Only a fraction of people would get this.

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π€︎ u/TickleLife
π︎ Oct 03 2020
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Found this in class
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π€︎ u/SmolloSmoller
π︎ Nov 11 2019
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I bet the Department of Defense gives the low-quality rations to submarines.

After all, they're sub-optimal.

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π€︎ u/i-kant_even
π︎ Mar 30 2017
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I tried to fight a fraction once

It wasnβt a very rational decision though.

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π€︎ u/Xakik
π︎ Feb 03 2020
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What did the stout, starving sergeant eat in the army?

Alliter o' rations.

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π︎ Aug 12 2020
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9/11 jokes are not funny

But the other 2 are

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π€︎ u/M-L125K0
π︎ Jun 13 2019
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What do you call a snake that's 3.14 meters long?

A Οthon

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π€︎ u/nickyno
π︎ Mar 14 2017
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My older kid likes to eat frozen corn for a snack

But he is being rationed to one bowl a day right now and he already had his today. So when he asked me for more just now, I told him he couldn't because he's on cornantine.

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π€︎ u/proscriptus
π︎ Mar 29 2020
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How did 8 kill 18?

8/8/18

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π€︎ u/towntown1337
π︎ Aug 08 2018
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Where did ancient mathematicians hold their funerals?

Pyre Square

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π€︎ u/xwhy
π︎ Mar 15 2018
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New weights and measures
1. The ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter = Eskimo Pi2. 2000 pounds of Chinese soup = Won ton3. 1 millionth of a mouthwash = 1 microscope4. Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement = 1 bananosecond5. Weight an evangelist carries with God = 1 billigram6. Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour = Knotfurlong7. 16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone = 1 Rod Serling8. Half of a large intestine = 1 semicolon9. 1,000,000 aches = 1 megahurtz10. Basic unit of laryngitis = 1 hoarsepower11. Shortest distance between two jokes = A straight line12. 453.6 graham crackers = 1 pound cake13. 1 million-million microphones = 1 megaphone14. 2 million bicycles = 2 megacycles15. 365.25 days = 1 unicycle16. 2000 mockingbirds = 2 kilomockingbirds17. 52 cards = 1 decacards18. 1 kilogram of falling figs = 1 FigNewton19. 1000 milliliters of wet socks = 1 literhosen20. 1 millionth of a fish = 1 microfiche21. 1 trillion pins = 1 terrapin22. 10 rations = 1 decoration23. 100 rations = 1 C-ration24. 2 monograms = 1 diagram25. 4 nickels = 2 paradigms26. 2.4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University Hospital = 1 IV League27. 100 Senators = Not 1 decision
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π€︎ u/kickypie
π︎ Sep 22 2019
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Pun converter
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π€︎ u/afroman_17
π︎ Nov 17 2013
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I was sitting in a class about fractions, and someone said they were leaving early.

I responded "I guess you can say he was only here for a fraction of the class." my classmates are not happy with me.

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π€︎ u/thatoneidoit
π︎ Oct 21 2015
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How do SWAT teams celebrate Cinco de Mayo?

With Tac-taco rations

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π€︎ u/PaxPaw
π︎ Mar 30 2018
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My boyfriend whipped this one out on me today.

I've been hardcore PMSing lately, so I made brownies. I messed up the recipe somehow so, rationally, I started crying because I really wanted homemade brownies.

He walks in, hugs me, and says babe, it's okay. You're ovary-acting.

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π€︎ u/flynngravy69
π︎ Nov 10 2015
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Watching the NOVA on mathematics

I responded, "It is not supposed to be rational."

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π€︎ u/macx333
π︎ Apr 19 2015
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Calvin's Father is my role model

I totally believe in parenting similar to Calvin's father. As such, when my 6 year old son came to me and asked me why his index finger was shorter than his middle, I rationally explained to him that it had to be shorter because he'd poke his brain when he picked his nose.

It's been 3 weeks and he still believes me. :D

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π€︎ u/DavidTigerFan
π︎ Feb 24 2016
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Got the whole council with this one...

I am on the city council and we had a workshop about why utility rates are lower inside the city compared to outside.

It came down to this:

1. No study was done to show the validity of the difference.
2. It was strictly a policy decision with an arbitrary number.
3. The reason for this approach was simply that it is "standard in the industry" and because it is "what every other city does".

Prefacing that I was a dad so I had to say it: I suggested the rational wasn't the most sound since "just because every other city jumped off a bridge, it didn't mean I wasn't going to jump off a bridge."

Mixture of groans and laughter.

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π€︎ u/gabeanzelini
π︎ Apr 11 2015
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There's a fine line between the numerator and the denominator.

Only a fraction of the people will get this joke

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π€︎ u/Reasonable-Loan
π︎ Feb 15 2020
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What do you call a snake that is exactly 3.14 meters long

A Οton

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π€︎ u/Jesse0172
π︎ Oct 12 2018
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