Pretzel Puns

A list of puns related to "Pretzel"

Why aren't pretzels counted as bread?

Because they're knot-bread.

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👤︎ u/Xenonthewizlard
📅︎ Jan 16 2021
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What secret society loves to eat pretzels?

The Illumi-Knotty

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👤︎ u/BobIsMyCableGuy
📅︎ Nov 17 2020
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What did the pretzel say when it was pulled out of the oven?

Gluten-tag!

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👤︎ u/Waffles_on_acid
📅︎ Oct 15 2020
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Two pretzels...

...were walking down the sidewalk. One was asalted

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👤︎ u/kritter826
📅︎ Aug 12 2020
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A bunch of rioters looted my pretzel shop.

Unfortunately, they got all my dough.

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👤︎ u/RunescapeCoin
📅︎ Jun 02 2020
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Two pretzels were walking in a bad neighborhood

One was assaulted

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👤︎ u/dannycorvette
📅︎ Feb 18 2020
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Why did the pretzel file a police report?

Cause he got assaulted.

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👤︎ u/KillerRedPanda14
📅︎ Dec 26 2019
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Did you know that pretzels are not bread?

*Knot bread

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👤︎ u/mustwarnothers
📅︎ May 06 2019
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Kids dumped a whole bag of pretzels on me

I was so salty

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👤︎ u/cenofwar
📅︎ Nov 14 2019
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How did the spaetzle greet the pretzel?

Gluten tag!

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👤︎ u/static612
📅︎ May 02 2019
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Did I tell you the one about the pretzel?

It was assaulted.

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👤︎ u/plmcalli
📅︎ Dec 07 2018
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Do you guys like dark humor? 'Cause I got this joke about pretzels...

But it's pretty twisted.

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👤︎ u/JinglesRasco
📅︎ Jun 16 2017
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Two pretzels walk into a bar

One was a salted

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👤︎ u/piatek30
📅︎ Jan 22 2019
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Detective movies often feature pretzels in them.

They both have a lot of twists.

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👤︎ u/Pun-isher42
📅︎ Jan 11 2019
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Joe walked by a bowl of pretzels in a lobby and got confused whe the pretzals said "you are very good at reading" You look Nice".Joe looked confused. The nearvy receptionist said "the pretzas are complimentary."
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👤︎ u/thatspunnyxd
📅︎ Oct 08 2018
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Most pretzels are dough knots
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👤︎ u/Quenoquesoporque
📅︎ Dec 04 2018
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Did you hear what happened to the pretzel?

He was assaulted.

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👤︎ u/Baby-Nugget
📅︎ Jan 28 2018
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2 pretzels were walking down the street thru a dark alley.

One was a salted.

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👤︎ u/shortydog05
📅︎ Dec 26 2016
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A sandwich walks into a bar and orders some pretzels.

The bartender says, "Sorry we don't serve food here."

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👤︎ u/FunnyBunnyEmoji
📅︎ Sep 18 2017
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I never could figure out how they make the glaze on pretzels.

Turns out, there's a very basic solution for that problem.

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👤︎ u/nuez_jr
📅︎ Feb 06 2015
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Was making hot pretzels and went to talk to my dad...

Timer went off and I said I had to go knead my dough. Dad replies, "Your dough needs you."

Dammit, dad.

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👤︎ u/kepotter
📅︎ Nov 18 2014
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Two pretzels were walking down the street...

One got assaulted.

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👤︎ u/Passerby49
📅︎ Dec 26 2019
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Two pretzels are walking down the street

One was assaulted

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👤︎ u/nickant81
📅︎ Jan 06 2020
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Pretzels

They're knot bread

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👤︎ u/Liv_Kato
📅︎ Jan 21 2019
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So two pretzels are taking a walk down the street.

One is a salted.

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👤︎ u/MostLikelyHandsome
📅︎ Dec 15 2017
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