What would happen if America switched from using pounds to kilograms as a unit a measure?

Mass confusion.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mighty_Platypus
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16 2021
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What does a Mandalorian say when they see they've gained a few pounds?

This is the Weigh.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/StephenHunterUK
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2021
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An udder day ... An udder pound ...
πŸ‘︎ 133
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nukes-n-Nudes
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Went to the grocery store and asked for 3 pounds of potatoes. "We don't have pounds", the grocer stated, "only kilos".

Annoyed, I went, "fine. I'll take 3 pounds of kilos then".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Arr_jay816
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2021
🚨︎ report
Why won’t Americans switch from pounds to kilos?

It would cause mass confusion

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πŸ‘€︎ u/fuckleberyfinn
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2020
🚨︎ report
We Tried Getting Americans to Start Measuring Weight in Kilograms Instead of Pounds

But they were very cagey about it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/adhoc42
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife got me today. Me, I'm making pound cake. I'm going to half the recipe

Her... so your making half a pound cake?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jrobertson50
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2020
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Last night I had a dream that I ate a twenty pound marshmallow.

I woke up this morning and my pillow was gone.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/crank740
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2020
🚨︎ report
I lost 80 pounds.

Now I won’t be able to pay for that new toaster I wanted.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KirbyBWCH
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2020
🚨︎ report
I lost 15 pounds on my Wii Fit

It was the best trade-in deal I could find

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πŸ‘€︎ u/danius353
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2020
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I was talking to a butcher the other day who showed me a 10 pound bratwurst

So I said "A ten pound bratwurst? I never sausage a thing!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CaptainAmerilard
πŸ“…︎ Jul 11 2020
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My friend dumped a five hundred pound load of pig intestines on his boss's desk in protest...

That took a lot of guts!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Aug 27 2020
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It didn't even cost me a pound.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/orlanthi
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28 2020
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I've gained almost 20 pounds since the quarantine...

I call it my Covid- 19

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RustyWood86
πŸ“…︎ Jun 16 2020
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Which weighs more, a pound of water or a pound of kerosene?

The water, because the other one is the lighter fluid.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/themeatbridge
πŸ“…︎ Apr 13 2020
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I just lost 50 pounds!

HAS ANYONE SEEN MY SON?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pokenerdgamer
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2020
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The local dragon regularly poops hundreds of pounds of ore directly into the sea.

It's a gross waste of resources.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Impybutt
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31 2020
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If you add a dollar and a pound what do you get?

$quid.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/wootangAlpha
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the 600-pound canary say to the cat?

[[in your deepest possible voice]] Here kitty kitty kitty....

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mikerowave
πŸ“…︎ Jun 22 2020
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Did you hear about the 500 pound man that they had to bury with a backhoe?

It was a huge undertaking.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lfantine
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call 100s of pounds of bread?

Crou tons

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RedFish12094
πŸ“…︎ May 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Is that what they call a 900 pound Guerilla?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/puppylove1000
πŸ“…︎ Apr 19 2020
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Son: Dad if I'm 99 pounds and eat 1 pound of nachos I would be 99% human 1% nachos!

Dad: you're 100% my son you will not !

Son: 99% your son.

Dad:...?

Son: 1% nacho son.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Messicanhero
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2020
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I saw 2000 pounds of quarters the other day

That’s a ton of money!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NekoLover72
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2019
🚨︎ report
Why didn’t USA switch from pounds to grams?

Because of mass outrage.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/slashmatt-the-cat
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2020
🚨︎ report
I lost 150 pounds!

Unfortunately it was at a casino in England

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πŸ‘€︎ u/charlie2135
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2020
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I lost 30 pounds in a week...

I really hate losing money.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/noneoftheless
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2020
🚨︎ report
I keep trying to make pound cake, but it never comes out right.

It's always off by a few ounces.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/manuel_f_p
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2020
🚨︎ report
I lost 10 pounds

But don't worry, I found it

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Trtlman
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2020
🚨︎ report
Why is the USA afraid to convert to using kilograms instead of pounds?

We're afraid of mass confusion!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BartlebyX
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2020
🚨︎ report
If I want to lose a couple of POUNDS

...I’ll just pay England.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ithinkhisnameis
πŸ“…︎ Mar 07 2020
🚨︎ report
In for a penny out for a pound
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Skelopun
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2019
🚨︎ report
A pound of bricks weighs more than a pound of feathers

In America you can buy a square foot of bricks for around $8.50. There are 7 bricks in a square foot, meaning you are buying each brick for about a $1.21. Today one dollar is 0.75 pounds, so $1.21 is about 0.92 pounds, meaning for a full pound you can buy 1.087 bricks for about a pound. Each brick weighs 5 pounds, which means 1.087 bricks weighs 5.435 pounds. Now on the other hand you many buy 48 feathers for one dollar in America , considering that one dollar is 0.75 ponds, you could buy 64 feathers. with one pound. Each feather weighs around 0.0003 ounces, which multiplied by 64 is 0.0192 ounces , which is 0.0012 pounds. 5.435> 0.0012. There you have it a pound of bricks weighs more than a pound if feathers .

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Depressed_Citrus
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a 1000 pound gorilla with a suit and tie and a machine gun?

β€œSir”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VictorHelios1
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2020
🚨︎ report
What happens when you drop a 14 pound weight on 2 canaries?

You kill 2 birds with one stone.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NSSupervisor
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2019
🚨︎ report
I ran for an hour today and lost one pound!

Maybe I should take the money out of my pockets next time.

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πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2020
🚨︎ report
Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight

There would be mass confusion.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SlovenianGregor
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2020
🚨︎ report
Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight

There would be mass confusion

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Alluxin_
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2020
🚨︎ report
I had a dream I ate a ten pound marshmallow

When I woke up my pillow was gone

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight

There would be a mass confusion

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DeletedForSpamm
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2020
🚨︎ report
Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms over night

There would be MASS confusion

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πŸ‘€︎ u/300_Black0ut
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2020
🚨︎ report
Imagine if America switched from pounds to kilograms overnight.

There'd be mass confusion.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cyclopropagative
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2020
🚨︎ report
Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight.

There would be a mass confusion

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πŸ‘€︎ u/throwawaytrol7134
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2020
🚨︎ report
If Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight, there would be mass confusion
πŸ‘︎ 10k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TimHP
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2018
🚨︎ report
If Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight.

There would be mass confusion

πŸ‘︎ 5k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bignate1213
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2018
🚨︎ report
Imagine what would happen if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight...

There would be mass confusion!

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AYKW
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2018
🚨︎ report
Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight…

There would be mass confusion.

πŸ‘︎ 71
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πŸ‘€︎ u/yoitsrebeca
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2019
🚨︎ report

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