Apparently he's a bit Turklish.
I guess beauty is in the eyes of the beer holder.
The doctor took one look and said, "Well, I can tell that you're not eating right."
Wife: "I hate these underwires. I think I want to get a wire-less one next"
Me: "I can stop by Radioshack on my way home to pick you up one"
Wife: "What?"
Me: "Well I'm sure Victorias Secret doesn't carry WiFi bras."
Wife: Heavy sigh.
Mom: I know I'm tired, but I got to get those extra hours whenever I can. My checks are getting smaller and smaller.
Dad: No, the checks are always the same size.
Doc: Your finger is broken.
Poker Face
P-Ouch!!
Now our relationship is tainted.
One makes you see bad, the other makes a bee sad.
I measure your patience.
I did not see that one coming.
I stopped seeing her for a while.
A slowpoke!
*a friend of mine told me this and I thought it would fit well here
Damn near poked my eye out!
You poke him on.
Poke her face.
The Jamaican man replies he just wanted to poke a mon.
Or, worse yet, get kilt.
Tap water
r/jokes thought that this joke belongs here
βYou wanna take this outside?β
I canβt see myself doing that again any time soon.
You poke em on! Am I relevant yet?
A Pokèman
Because they're lashing out!
PokΓ©-mon
I call it SoCal commentary.
You po-po-po-poke her face!
A slow poke
I threw it away got another and called it The Straw Shank Redemption.
I poked my head in his room, and he was blathering about how he wanted to quit school and be a truck driver.
"I'm gonna get one of those big beautiful Peterbuilts, with all the running lights everywhere. Or maybe a Mack with an extended cab..."
"Better brew him a pot of coffee," I told his mother. "The final is in a half hour, and he's only semi-conscious."
The Pillsbury Doughboy, remembered best as "Pop N Serve", and/or "Pop N Fresh", died yesterday of a severe yeast infection and trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71.
Doughboy will be buried in this lightly greased coffin.
Dozens of celebrities will turn out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch.
The grave site is expected to be piled high with flours.
Aunt Jemima will deliver the eulogy and lovingly describe Doughboy as "a man who never knew how much he was kneaded".
Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers.. He was considered a very smart cookie, but wasted much of his dough on half-baked schemes.
Despite being a little flaky at times, he still was a crusty old man and was considered a positive roll model for millions.
Doughboy is survived by his wife, Play dough, three children: John Dough, Jane Dough and Dosey Dough, plus they had one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop tart.
The funeral will be held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.
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Pa pa pa poke her face pa pa poke her face.
So i decided to look into one
...so I stopped seeing her for a little while.
You poke-him-on
Damn near poked my eye out.
Damn near poked my eye out.
