I have a Pierce Brosnan sticker I can't remove

It's bonded, James Bond-ed

👍︎ 3
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👤︎ u/plunged_ewe
📅︎ Jan 08 2021
🚨︎ report
How much did it cost the pirate to pierce his ears?

A buck an ear...

...it was a real barrrrgain

👍︎ 11
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👤︎ u/Sleepwalker696
📅︎ Feb 07 2020
🚨︎ report
Sean Connery. David Niven. George lazenby. Roger Moore. Timothy Dalton. Pierce Brosnan. Daniel Craig.

They all share a bond

👍︎ 19
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👤︎ u/obiworm
📅︎ Mar 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Luke Skywalker works at an Inking and Piercing Parlor. What is his specialty?

Tatooine.

👍︎ 8
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👤︎ u/blaizesparks
📅︎ Mar 13 2021
🚨︎ report
Pirate gets his ears pierced. How much did it cost.

A buccaneer.

👍︎ 196
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👤︎ u/Kevin407
📅︎ Nov 11 2020
🚨︎ report
Captain Hook was upset about the cost of his ear piercings.

But it was only a buck an ear.

👍︎ 6
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👤︎ u/kdlaz
📅︎ Feb 19 2021
🚨︎ report
How much does it cost to get your ears pierced in Tampa Bay?

A Buccaneer

Good win for them tonight.

👍︎ 9
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👤︎ u/NaviSkater
📅︎ Feb 08 2021
🚨︎ report
Medium rare, please
👍︎ 51
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👤︎ u/SnooCakes2241
📅︎ May 01 2021
🚨︎ report
Nipple Piercings should be called nipholes
👍︎ 7
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👤︎ u/BBQChipCookie2
📅︎ Oct 07 2020
🚨︎ report
Not a big fan of piercings is the key takeaway
👍︎ 14
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👤︎ u/Amateurlapse
📅︎ Nov 04 2019
🚨︎ report
My friend got her leg pierced with a lot of diamond studs...

She might have a gam-bling addiction.

👍︎ 10
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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ Dec 19 2019
🚨︎ report
That's a wHOLE lot of piercings! I guess this singer really is metal.
👍︎ 3
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👤︎ u/phantomlordpt
📅︎ Jul 18 2019
🚨︎ report
Pirate ear piercing artists are really cheap

They're just a buck an ear.

👍︎ 4
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📅︎ Nov 01 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the pirates who started the ear piercing shop?

it costs a buck-an-ear

👍︎ 12
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👤︎ u/TheEmeraldKing15
📅︎ Sep 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Why would anyone think priests don't have piercings?

I mean, they're holy.

👍︎ 16
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👤︎ u/se1nsss
📅︎ May 07 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a bar of soap that has been pierced by a nail?

Pears soap

👍︎ 5
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👤︎ u/Mayteras
📅︎ Jan 24 2019
🚨︎ report
I bought a universal small pointed tool used for piercing holes

awl for one and one for awl

👍︎ 5
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👤︎ u/hotsprings1234
📅︎ Apr 19 2019
🚨︎ report
You shouldn't get a penile piercing...

It hurts like the dickends

👍︎ 6
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👤︎ u/8PhantomProphet8
📅︎ Oct 23 2018
🚨︎ report
The best way to get dad joked:

I know it's been done before, and many a dad before me and many a dad after me will get to experience this, but in these dark times this was a ray of light that pierced me right to the core with joy.

I came home, and my bright and bubbly ballerina 6 year old runs up and says can I have a hug!?

She asks very tentatively because she knows I have been out all day and the routine is for me to grab a shower (COVID) before I let them get all over me.

So I say, not yet I'm dirty.

She says awww... then she turns to walk away, but then spins back around and looks at me dead in the eye and says:

Hi! um...

wait a sec,

um, I know um,

um, wait.... dir...

[Face beams the biggest smile of accomplishment]

Hi Dirty! I'm [daughter]!

I know we have those proud moments when they turn, but man her delivery, the awkwardness, and the sheer pride she beamed out when she realized she just pulled the reverse dad joke on me...

It's not the getting reverse dad'd, it's the joy and pride she had... she could have just graduated college, and that's how big her beaming smile was right then...

It's a memory I am going to keep and it really lit up this dark time.

👍︎ 50
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👤︎ u/leyline
📅︎ Jun 24 2020
🚨︎ report
Overheard a super dad at a restaurant today: "Why do pirates get their ears pierced?"

Because it's only a buccaneer..

👍︎ 32
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👤︎ u/ChiefSparty10
📅︎ Jul 08 2017
🚨︎ report
My little brother sat down at dinner after getting his ear pierced for the first time...

No one notices for a minute or two until my dad catches sight of it.

"Oh H! You got a bit of metal in your ear."

Mum starts fussing straight away but quickly calms down.

"Where'd you get it done?" She asks.

Without skipping a beat dad says.

"In his left ear"

👍︎ 216
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👤︎ u/littlelondonboy
📅︎ Jan 25 2014
🚨︎ report
My sister wants her nose pierced

At dinner my sister told my dad she really wants a hole in her nose. My dad replied, "You've already got two."

👍︎ 17
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👤︎ u/Ps3FifaCfc95
📅︎ Apr 20 2014
🚨︎ report
I was passing by my son's bedroom and was astonished to see the bed was nicely made and everything was picked up…

Then, I saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow.

It was addressed, 'Dad'.

With the worst premonition, I opened the envelope and read the letter, with trembling hands:

"Dear, Dad.

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you.

I had to elope with my new girlfriend, because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.

I've been finding real passion with Stacy.

She is so nice, but I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercing's, tattoos, her tight motorcycle clothes and because she is so much older than I am.

But it's not only the passion, Dad.

She's pregnant.

Stacy said that we will be very happy.

She owns a trailer in the woods, and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter.

We share a dream of having many more children.

Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone.

We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people in the commune for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want.

In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so that Stacy can get better.

She sure deserves it!

Don't worry Dad, I'm 15, and I know how to take care of myself.

Someday, I'm sure we'll be back to visit so you can get to know your many grandchildren.

Love, your son, Joshua.

P.S. Dad, none of the above is true.

I'm over at Jason's house.

I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the school report that's on the kitchen table.

Call when it is safe for me to come home!"

👍︎ 8k
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👤︎ u/madazzahatter
📅︎ Jun 01 2017
🚨︎ report
My uncle had a look which could slice through homosexual people.

It was a piercing gays.

👍︎ 5
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👤︎ u/OnTheEdje
📅︎ Feb 17 2019
🚨︎ report
How much does it cost a pirate to pierce his ears?

A buck-an-ear

👍︎ 52
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👤︎ u/blueboy9120
📅︎ Mar 10 2019
🚨︎ report
How much does it cost to pierce a pirate's ear?

A buccaneer

👍︎ 23
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👤︎ u/DudleyDawson18
📅︎ Aug 18 2018
🚨︎ report
How Much does a pirate charge to pierce your ears?

A Buccaneer.

👍︎ 24
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👤︎ u/Insert_delete
📅︎ Dec 09 2016
🚨︎ report
How much does it cost for a pirate to get his ear pierced ?

A Buccaneer

👍︎ 9
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👤︎ u/JayQnz
📅︎ Oct 09 2020
🚨︎ report
How much does it cost a pirate to get his ear pierced?

Its a buccaneer

👍︎ 100
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👤︎ u/poojabber84
📅︎ May 12 2020
🚨︎ report
How much does it cost a pirate to get their ears pierced?

A buck an ear.

👍︎ 78
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👤︎ u/Perrin42
📅︎ Mar 21 2020
🚨︎ report
How much does it cost pirates to get their ears pierced?

About a buccaneer.

👍︎ 20
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👤︎ u/dandan_56
📅︎ Mar 06 2020
🚨︎ report
How much does it cost for a pirate to get his ears pierced?

About a buccaneer.

👍︎ 15
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👤︎ u/Mama_Bear15
📅︎ Mar 10 2020
🚨︎ report
How much does it cost a pirate to get his ears pierced?

About a Buccaneer.

👍︎ 18
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📅︎ Mar 04 2020
🚨︎ report
How much to get a pirate piercing?

A buck an ear...

👍︎ 12
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👤︎ u/breakone9r
📅︎ Jan 09 2020
🚨︎ report
How much should a pirate pay to get his ears pierced?

A buccaneer

👍︎ 24
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👤︎ u/IMightNotBeKevin
📅︎ Feb 11 2020
🚨︎ report
My friend likes to get her leg pierced with diamond studs...

I think she might have a gam-bling addiction.

👍︎ 2
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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ Jan 25 2020
🚨︎ report
How much does a pirate pay to have his ears pierced?

A buccaneer

👍︎ 14
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👤︎ u/EchoThatEnds
📅︎ Sep 19 2018
🚨︎ report
How much did the pirate pay to have his ears pierced?

A buck an ear

👍︎ 3
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📅︎ Nov 03 2019
🚨︎ report
How much does a pirate pay for ear piercings?

A buck an ear

👍︎ 121
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👤︎ u/Skycannon7
📅︎ Apr 09 2018
🚨︎ report
How much does it cost a pirate to get his ears pierced?

A buccaneer.

👍︎ 9
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👤︎ u/Spotted_Lady
📅︎ Nov 27 2018
🚨︎ report
How much does a pirate charge for ear piercings?

A buck an ear.

👍︎ 158
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👤︎ u/FranksRumHam
📅︎ Feb 01 2018
🚨︎ report
How much for a pirate to get his ears pierced?

A buccaneer!

👍︎ 37
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👤︎ u/Isodoper
📅︎ Sep 20 2017
🚨︎ report
How much did it cost the pirate to get his ears pierced?

A buccaneer.

👍︎ 50
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👤︎ u/dothepropellor
📅︎ Oct 10 2017
🚨︎ report
How much does it cost for the pirate to get his ears pierced?

A buccaneer

👍︎ 10
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👤︎ u/UcHiHa_0bIt0
📅︎ Aug 12 2018
🚨︎ report
How much did the pirate pay for his piercings?

A buck-an-ear.

👍︎ 6
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👤︎ u/yoeyz
📅︎ Sep 20 2018
🚨︎ report
How much does it cost for a pirate to get his ears pierced?

Buccaneer.

👍︎ 2
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👤︎ u/cross_beaux
📅︎ Jun 04 2018
🚨︎ report
How much is it for a pirate to get his ear pierced?

a buck'n'ear

👍︎ 127
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👤︎ u/darrenja
📅︎ Nov 01 2015
🚨︎ report
How much does a pirate pay to have his ears pierced?

About a buccaneer!

👍︎ 52
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👤︎ u/Joblolboj
📅︎ Oct 24 2015
🚨︎ report
How much did the pirate charge for ear piercing?

A buccaneer.

👍︎ 6
💬︎
👤︎ u/pappster
📅︎ Apr 03 2015
🚨︎ report

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