A list of puns related to "Pitchfork Media"
This company? Shit. They must have taken a business and music 101 class at the local primary school and decided that they were capable enough to start an entertainment company because oh my GOD. They have made some questionable decisions.
So this is in response to MCNDs latest comeback because I'm a huge Gem they are my ults.
These fuckers really chose the absolute WORST songs the actual PITS of their latest album to promote. No wonder everyone hates 4th gen boy groups because they keep making boring and average songs their lead singles when they have GORGEOUS and DELECTABLE bsides that no one's ever going to listen to because you, YOU TOP MEDIA decided that singing about MOVING while DANCING (So creative wow) was more attention grabbing than singing about being cat boys walking across keyboards and dancing in the street. THATS SO CUTE HELLO????? AND YOU CHOSE TO PROMOTE THESE FLOP SONGS INSTEAD???????
You must have actually never spent a day on social media if you don't think people would EAT UP these cute songs we want these cute boys to be cute NO ONE wants them to literally just repeat what they did last time with Crush but a little bit worse. Yes I said it Movin' is crush but a 6/10 instead of a 10/10.
"But it's their signature sound" No. their first comeback was Spring. They can do cute.
AND NOW ONTO YOUR PROMOTION TACTICS.
Where. Are. The. Cover. [Dances.](https://www.youtube.com/wa
... keep reading on reddit β‘Pitchfork News will be dedicated to AustraliaSim music news and reviews, as well as surprisingly hard hitting politics journalism (like how Rolling Stone does it). It will be run by press person Tim Schenectady.
#A ROAST OF PITCHFORK MEDIA
Essentially a one way trash talk thread of a single artist entity. This is a weekly thing that covers artists and other things in the indie music sphere.
GUIDELINES
This is a roast thread, please take all jokes as wellβ¦..a joke. Jokes are Jokes, donβt like it? Move on.
NO OTHER ARTIST BASHING, save that precious ammo for when that artist's time to be roasted comes. This includes suggesting artists for future roasts, it detracts from the focus of the post. If you want to suggest an artist, PM me.
No malicious posts, trolling, or over the top comments attacking r/indieheads users. As i said before this is supposed to be light hearted and fun, lets keep it that way.
The next artist/thing up will be posted in the thread the week before, so you guys will have time to come up with material and decent jokes referring to the artist.
Have fun! This is meant to be lighthearted thread and they are to be taken as such. Roast away!!
Previous Roasts
Next Week's Artist - Bon Iver
Surprising to see love and loyalty on here sadly no duckworth or fear.
This is Kendrickβs third album of the year award for anyone whos curious.
So I keep seeing lots of people on Twitter and Forms tying to Correct Gun Media say its not a "Pitchfork" for the Savini Skin insisting its a "Trident" because it has 3 Prongs. 1st I think its Crazy to pick at something so small but since people want to get technical then here you go.
A Trident is not a Trident because it has 3 prongs as there are 3 pronged Pitchforks as shown by this famous painting here which I am sure everyone has seen before http://i.imgur.com/1oRsqlK.jpg but instead what makes a Trident a Trident is because it has Barbed Points at the ends to secure fish from sliding off since they were typically used for spear fishing http://i.imgur.com/JlBz1Ur.png?1
So to be clear, so everyone is on the same page. A Pitchfork like the weapon the Tom Savini Jason uses has no hooked "barbed" ends instead they are straight so they can quickly stab into something and exit easily for smooth throwing meaning Pitching.
Where a Trident is designed to stab in and keep ahold of something so it doesn't slide off.
Why are love and lust for life the only songs on the album appearing on these lists?
Okay so anyone reading the title will see that the examples I have given are really popular and apparently "baseline" (more like "bass line") sources for music criticism, but I've been having trouble finding sources for album or single reviews and music history/culture essays, particularly in an online format.
Suggestions could be as varied in their content or as specialized as you want, I'm primarily interested in the criticism and "voice" of the reviews/essays so anything that you guys like would be awesome!
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