I've been trying out some new knitting patterns, but I think my yarn is too thin

Sorry wrong thread

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Alecdoconnor
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2020
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I just gave a sick burn to a load of hedges shaped into a pattern.

It was amazing.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kimenon001
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2020
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An alternative... was that A'Tuin was crawling from the Birthplace to the Time of Mating. When they arrived they would briefly and passionately mate, for the first and only time, and from that fiery union new turtles would be born to carry a new pattern of worlds.

This was known as the Big Bang hypothesis.

Joke by Terry Pratchett, β€˜The Colour of Magic’, Prologue.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/WatashiStickKid
πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2020
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I thought the pattern on my coffee mug was defective...
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πŸ‘€︎ u/honeyvcombs99
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2019
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"Ho, ho, ho," the jolly bastard mused, unaware I'd been slinking in the shadows for days, ready to unleash my revenge. I'd memorized his patterns, followed his every move, and had set the perfect trap. Down the chimney, ensnared by my noose, and left hanging above the fireplace; I got what I wanted.

A Christmas stalking.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jeromocles
πŸ“…︎ Mar 05 2020
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So the Norwegian Navy is painting their ships with a bar code pattern

So when then come into port, they can Scandanavian

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ouyin2000
πŸ“…︎ Feb 03 2020
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My smartphone tracks my cat's sleep patterns.

There's a nap for that.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JoeFas
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2019
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My son has recently been starting to suffer from early male pattern baldness, like I did at his age.

I think itβ€˜s haireditery.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/carotoffel
πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2019
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How do sea animals forecast current patterns?

They use algae-rhythms

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πŸ‘€︎ u/chexmp
πŸ“…︎ Mar 31 2019
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When geese and ducks fly in a v-pattern, do you know why one side is almost always longer than the other?

Because there are more birds on that side.

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πŸ“…︎ Oct 08 2018
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After years of studying the flight patterns of ducks, scientists finally determined why one side of the "V" is always longer than the other.

There are more ducks on that side.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zhiva88
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2018
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If you rake a leaf pattern, you leave a rake pattern.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/luleigas
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2017
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Coughing in a pattern is basically dropping a sick beat.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mattatbatt
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2018
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What do you call a vegetable in a particular red white and blue pattern

Onion Jack

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πŸ‘€︎ u/b8410
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17 2018
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In a certain part of Africa, the migratory pattern of lions heralds the changing of seasons

The people say that the lions come at the end of August with such regularity, they can begin to prepare for winter on the day they arrive. After all, The Pride comes before the fall.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cormag778
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2016
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Paisley is such an ugly pattern
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ElegantWeapon
πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2014
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Dad and I were discussing the migration patterns of loons....

Dad - You know why you always see loons by themselves?

Me - Territori.....

Dad - Because if there were more than one, they would not be a-loon

-_-

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πŸ‘€︎ u/manthey8989
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2015
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What do you call it when the crew of the starship enterprise enters a massive, destructive weather pattern?

An Uhuracane

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zibani
πŸ“…︎ Jun 05 2018
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What's the next part of the pattern?

Cat 1

Cat 2

Cat 3

Cat 4

What comes next?

Ethernet

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Gilzabizlo
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2015
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My Mother: This hat pattern looks easier than the other one....

Me: It’s sew easy!

My Husband: It’s not very sewphisticated!...Do my puns have you in stitches? I’m laughing so hard I’m bobbin my head back and forth.

My Dad: Are you starting to see a pattern here?

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2015
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My Wife said she drew her friend a quilting pattern she asked for...

But I told her winners never quilt.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Gunnrhildr
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2015
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Fell into a generational dad joke pattern

My dad passed recently. He was the king of the silly sayings.

Was taking my grandson to go ice skating. We were running late and caught myself saying "We're off, like a herd of turtles!". Something my dad used to say ALL the time. Made me nostalgic...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ssn697
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2014
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Professor asked if anyone knew what "home-range" was in reference to dolphin migratory patterns.

Me: It's Kansas State song.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Schro3der
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2014
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