I heard they were PANTing at the end of the race.
πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MShafiS
πŸ“…︎ May 28 2020
🚨︎ report
You know what type of pants Mario and Luigi wear?

Denim denim denim.

πŸ‘︎ 41
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/n0senuggetz
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2021
🚨︎ report
The lady who hems my pants appeared anxious...

In fact, I know she seamstressed

πŸ‘︎ 179
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hotsprings1234
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2021
🚨︎ report
I always bring an extra pair of pants golfing...

...just in case I get a hole in one.

πŸ‘︎ 28
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Sugar_Wolf
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2021
🚨︎ report
What kind of pants does lightning mcqueen wear?

Car-go Pants

i created this joke while sitting on the toilet.

πŸ‘︎ 71
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Pepe_Le_Frog
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2020
🚨︎ report
A guy sees a pirate walking down the street with a steering wheel in his pants...

He yells, hey! Hey, pirate! There's a steering wheel in your pants! Pirate says, Aarr, I know! It's driving me nuts!

πŸ‘︎ 26
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/FeelixOne
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2020
🚨︎ report
For most people when you lose your 'khakis', you have lost your pants.

But, when you're from Boston and you lose your 'khakis', you can't start your car.

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call a smart pair of pants?

A jeanius

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Ronin861
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2020
🚨︎ report
A pirate walked into a bar. He had a steering wheel in his pants.

He said to the bartender, β€œArr, it’s driving me nuts!”

πŸ‘︎ 54
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/officialsmolkid
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2020
🚨︎ report
I asked you to pretreat those pants, you better not try to make the puppy do it..

or else I'ma start singing "WHO LENT THE DOG ZOUT"

(Alright I think these are out of my system... no promises)

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2021
🚨︎ report
My cousin peed his pants the other day.

I told him "Yer in trouble."

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/soloazn
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2020
🚨︎ report
Last evening I walked up the hill in the park to see the planets. Stumbled over a lip in the concrete and went down pretty hard. Ripped pants and skinned hands and knees. When I got to the top I couldn't see a thing.

The view was not worth the trip.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/I_Think_Naught
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call teenagers who pee in their pants at the age of 14?

Peenagers

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/burijazz
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2020
🚨︎ report
How come the Hulk doesn’t lose his pants when he transforms?

The scientific experiments altered his jeans

πŸ‘︎ 13k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Bueno117
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2020
🚨︎ report
The toddler pooped his pants, but kept on playing...

...Undie-turd.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/KW-DadJoker
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2020
🚨︎ report
Why does a golfer always wear two pairs of pants?

In case he gets a hole in one.

πŸ‘︎ 63
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cosh1990
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2020
🚨︎ report
A man went to the doctor with a steering wheel down his pants

The doctor asked, "Why do you have a steering wheel down your pants?"

The man said, "I dunno, but it's driving me nuts!"

πŸ‘︎ 47
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Will7838
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2020
🚨︎ report
What kinda pants does Mario wear??

Denim, denim, denim.

Hope this hasn’t been posted before.

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dirtydave13
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2020
🚨︎ report
"Trousers" is a fancy words for pants

It's a fancy pants word.

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/misterspaceman
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2020
🚨︎ report
Despite my best efforts, I pooped my pants

It was an undeterred undie turd

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2020
🚨︎ report
What's worse than ants in your pants ?

Uncles.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2020
🚨︎ report
I call these my Vice President Mike Pants.
πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TopGovtOfficial
πŸ“…︎ Oct 08 2020
🚨︎ report
A pirate walks into a bar and the barman says "do you realise that you have a steering wheel down your pants"

The Pirate replies aaarrr it's driving me nuts

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mrjaxson1111
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2020
🚨︎ report
I just tried on my Spider-Man pants for a costume party

They look great but the fly keeps getting stuck

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/crunchybedsheets
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2020
🚨︎ report
What type of pants should you wear ghost hunting?

I recommend a pair a normal jeans.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Buttlerubbies2
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2020
🚨︎ report
Why Do Pilgrim's Pants Always Fall Down?

Because There Buckles Are On There Hats!

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/barbetto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2020
🚨︎ report
Pirate goes to doctor to have groin pain checked. Dr. looks down pirates pants and says, β€œyou have a captain’s steering wheel in your pants.”

Pirate replied, β€œarghh, it’s driving me nuts”.

πŸ‘︎ 41
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/legendary-jake
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2020
🚨︎ report
What happens when Eren's pant is loose?

He titans it.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Artisticspawm
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2020
🚨︎ report
Why don't birds wear pants?

Because their pecker is on their head

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/timeforchange32
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the pirate put pants on his treasure?

To hide his booty!

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CyberOGa3
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2020
🚨︎ report
Love is like peeing your pants...

... Everyone can see it, but only you can feel the warmth.

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TickleLife
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2020
🚨︎ report
After 30 years of marriage, I can both proudly and firmly declare that I still wear the pants in my family...

My wife just tells me which ones to wear.

πŸ‘︎ 82
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/andersonfmly
πŸ“…︎ Sep 19 2020
🚨︎ report
A Scottish man was just forced to wear pants!

It damn nearly kilt him...

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/clark_creationz
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2020
🚨︎ report
Dad told me to wear my pants very high due to the pandemic

He said the best way to not get infected is to practice proper high-jeans

πŸ‘︎ 86
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/a_cat_says_woof
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2020
🚨︎ report
"Are those your pants, stumbling around by themselves and puking all over everything?"

"Yeah, they're my high/wasted jeans."

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/pj566
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2020
🚨︎ report
Why doesn’t a chicken wear pants?

Its pecker is on his face

πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hungry-fangirl
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2020
🚨︎ report
If you go golfing, make sure to wear two pair of pants

In case you get a hole in one

πŸ‘︎ 28
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Shalopalop
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2020
🚨︎ report
What does a pirate say when he’s got a steering wheel in his pants?

Arghhh you’re driving me nuts

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thebettereli
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18 2020
🚨︎ report
I had to take dad shopping for pants....

When asked how they fit he replied: "like a cheaply made castle, no ballroom".

πŸ‘︎ 65
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MrBlue08
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2020
🚨︎ report
A pirate with a ship’s wheel in his pants walks into a bar. The bartender can’t help but ask about it.

The pirate replies, β€œArrgh, it’s driving me nuts!”

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/sauron3579
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2020
🚨︎ report
These pants crack me up...

https://preview.redd.it/294ds0yrw2h51.jpg?width=1000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=59aecd04a9f1a84f21ea972df9bb31ca8d0bf046

Puma pants.

Pu...ma...pants.

Poo my pants.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ConstipatedGibbon
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2020
🚨︎ report
I pead my pants
πŸ‘︎ 64
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ May 17 2020
🚨︎ report
My pants always fall down when I wear my Airbus belt

It was made Toulouse

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AzZaRRaZzA
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2020
🚨︎ report
An ancient Greek walks into his tailor’s shop with a pair of torn pants.

β€˜β€™Euripides’’ says the tailor. β€˜β€™Yeah, Eumenides?’’ replies the man.

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/lastatlongbourne
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2020
🚨︎ report
What Mr. Crabs wears under his pants?

Crabby panties

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/farquaadschin
πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do golfers wear 2 pairs of pants

In case they get a hole in one

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BurnedTatti
πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2020
🚨︎ report
What kind of pants does Mario wear?

Denim denim denim.

πŸ‘︎ 56
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Beerfix
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2020
🚨︎ report
What kind of pants does Mario wear?

Denim denim denim

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/InterwebWeasel
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Whats worse than ants in your pants?

Uncles

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hayeshilton
πŸ“…︎ Sep 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do golfers wear two pairs of pants?

In case they get a hole in one.

πŸ‘︎ 76
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SyncingShiip
πŸ“…︎ Jul 08 2020
🚨︎ report

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