Got my sisters whole family with my dumb owl joke, with a bonus follow up groaner
Me: I don't wanna alarm anyone, but I think someone in this room might be an owl.
Sisters kids: Who? WHO?
Me: gasp OH NO IT'S WORSE THAN I THOUGHT!
cue 2 hours of 4 small kids running around the house like nutcases screaming who at each other
Sister: You don't get to tell my kids dad jokes anymore. You're not even a dad
Me: I'm a faux pas
You notice how you don’t ever see rich owls?
They all work for an owly wage
What do you call an owl that does magic tricks?
My shift at work ends at midnight, but I'm a night owl so I find staying up late easy...
...I could stay up until midnight with my eyes closed.
I don't trust the owls at Machu Pichu...
I reckon they are all Inca hoots.
Fred: “Someone said that you look like an owl?” Meg: “Who?”
Fred: “You sound like one, too.”
What does a grammatically-correct, upside-down owl inquire?
You know, owls never go on a date if it's raining.
Me: someone we know is possessed by an owl
Friend: who?
Me: [narrows eyes]
The YouTube Owl-gorithm decides hoo to watch 🦉
what did the owl say when he didnt know someone
What's the most common form of Owl on Owl attack?
Someone told me you sell owls.
Hoo?
(From my daughter. Made me laugh)
Owl jump on the barn-wagon
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Who
... who who?
How did you know I'm an owl! :o
What's an owl's favorite rock band?
Owl to cop: “I’d like to report an incident..”
Cop: Giggling “Do you know HOO dunnit?”
Owl: “Sir, eight people were murdered”
Cop: O_O
Some consider owls to be symbols of death.
Dad: What does the owl say?
What External Organ does an Owl use to Breathe?
Why does the owl turn off it's phone at night?
So it doesn't get any hooty calls.
If a male owl's sibling adopts a baboon,
then owl be a monkey's uncle.
Out of all the birds that exist, owls are the most beautiful.
They are quite the head turner.
What's the difference between a bad marksman and a constipated owl?
The marksman can shoot but not hit...
Why don't owls fly in a V formation?
Because if they did they'd be vowels.
What is the call of a Spanish speaking owl?
If an owl is like a well read chicken, what is an owl's favorite food?
What’s an owls favorite city?
The rapper Mike Jones and a owl walk into a bar.
Why did they arrest the owl?
Wife took a picture of Doctor Hoo
Just thought of an Owl joke.
What language do birds speak?
Winglish!
Owl see myself out now.
Why don’t owls breed in the rain?
Because it’s too wet to woo.
I've got a friend who is an owl, and the other day he told me he's getting married....
So I said, you twit to who?
Friend: someone here is possessed by a owl
What’s the difference between a bad marksman and a constipated owl?
One can shoot but can’t hit
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