Got my sisters whole family with my dumb owl joke, with a bonus follow up groaner
Me: I don't wanna alarm anyone, but I think someone in this room might be an owl.
Sisters kids: Who? WHO?
Me: gasp OH NO IT'S WORSE THAN I THOUGHT!
cue 2 hours of 4 small kids running around the house like nutcases screaming who at each other
Sister: You don't get to tell my kids dad jokes anymore. You're not even a dad
Me: I'm a faux pas
π︎ 11k
π
︎ Jan 05 2021
Why owls are so smart?
π︎ 5
π
︎ Apr 18 2021
Ancient South American owls always worked together secretly.
π︎ 15
π
︎ Apr 12 2021
I bought an owl that produces pasta from its mouth when it makes a sound.
I got it at a carb hoot sale.
π︎ 6
π
︎ May 11 2021
In my early years I gave my friend an owl
Back then I used to give a hoot.
π︎ 12
π
︎ May 07 2021
Did you hear about the 2 owls?
They're in cahoots with each other.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Apr 18 2021
Imagine how excited Barn Owls were....
....when humans invented barns ?
π︎ 3
π
︎ May 10 2021
What did the owl say when her son talked back to her
π︎ 7
π
︎ May 04 2021
Want to know something fascinating about the female owl?
Itβs the only bird to be classified as a mamowl.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Apr 26 2021
What did the cow say to the owl when they were playing chess?
The cow said: Moooooooo
The owl asked: who?
π︎ 5
π
︎ Apr 16 2021
What do you call it when one owl samurai wins a fight with another owl samurai?
π︎ 2
π
︎ Apr 20 2021
What type of owl is the worst at flying
π︎ 2
π
︎ Apr 06 2021
What do you call a magic owl?
π︎ 7
π
︎ Apr 07 2021
You notice how you donβt ever see rich owls?
They all work for an owly wage
π︎ 10
π
︎ Mar 04 2021
The main purpose of the call-response hooting that many owls engage in is to find and attract a potential mate.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Mar 29 2021
Possessed by an owl
π︎ 109
π
︎ Jan 23 2021
What do you call an owl that does magic tricks?
π︎ 16
π
︎ Feb 12 2021
I don't trust the owls at Machu Pichu...
I reckon they are all Inca hoots.
π︎ 27
π
︎ Feb 05 2021
My shift at work ends at midnight, but I'm a night owl so I find staying up late easy...
...I could stay up until midnight with my eyes closed.
π︎ 7
π
︎ Feb 15 2021
You know, owls never go on a date if it's raining.
π︎ 11
π
︎ Jan 05 2021
Fred: βSomeone said that you look like an owl?β Meg: βWho?β
Fred: βYou sound like one, too.β
π︎ 5
π
︎ Feb 12 2021
What does a grammatically-correct, upside-down owl inquire?
π︎ 14
π
︎ Feb 01 2021
Me: someone we know is possessed by an owl
Friend: who?
Me: [narrows eyes]
π︎ 31
π
︎ Jan 22 2021
The YouTube Owl-gorithm decides hoo to watch π¦
π︎ 5
π
︎ Dec 29 2020
What's the most common form of Owl on Owl attack?
π︎ 5
π
︎ Jan 06 2021
what did the owl say when he didnt know someone
π︎ 2
π
︎ Jan 22 2021
Someone told me you sell owls.
Hoo?
(From my daughter. Made me laugh)
π︎ 7
π
︎ Dec 13 2020
What's an owl's favorite rock band?
π︎ 6
π
︎ Dec 12 2020
Owl jump on the barn-wagon
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Who
... who who?
How did you know I'm an owl! :o
π︎ 5
π
︎ Jan 05 2021
Some consider owls to be symbols of death.
π︎ 13
π
︎ Dec 07 2020
Owl to cop: βIβd like to report an incident..β
Cop: Giggling βDo you know HOO dunnit?β
Owl: βSir, eight people were murderedβ
Cop: O_O
π︎ 5
π
︎ Dec 22 2020
If a male owl's sibling adopts a baboon,
then owl be a monkey's uncle.
π︎ 11
π
︎ Nov 01 2020
Dad: What does the owl say?
π︎ 8
π
︎ Dec 04 2020
What External Organ does an Owl use to Breathe?
π︎ 9
π
︎ Nov 29 2020
I love owls
π︎ 27
π
︎ Sep 24 2020
Why does the owl turn off it's phone at night?
So it doesn't get any hooty calls.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Dec 08 2020
What's the difference between a bad marksman and a constipated owl?
The marksman can shoot but not hit...
π︎ 45
π
︎ Sep 25 2020
Out of all the birds that exist, owls are the most beautiful.
They are quite the head turner.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Nov 29 2020
Why don't owls fly in a V formation?
Because if they did they'd be vowels.
π︎ 7
π
︎ Oct 13 2020
What is the call of a Spanish speaking owl?
π︎ 3
π
︎ Nov 16 2020
Owl tell you a joke
π︎ 114
π
︎ May 09 2020
If an owl is like a well read chicken, what is an owl's favorite food?
π︎ 6
π
︎ Oct 30 2020
Whatβs an owls favorite city?
π︎ 6
π
︎ Oct 22 2020
The rapper Mike Jones and a owl walk into a bar.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Aug 30 2020
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.
