A cannibal in Northern Germany is arrested while grilling beef patties.

He is accused of eating both hamburgers and Hamburgers.

πŸ‘︎ 152
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πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2021
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It was really cold in Northern Indiana today so I spent my day huddled in the corner...

It was 90 degrees in there

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lordofthstrings
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2021
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What do you call a woman that would rather stare at her phone than look up at the Northern lights?

Aurora Borealis

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/timthedriller
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2021
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Why are Northern people generally more rich?

Because there are so many snow banks around

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Geb69
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2020
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What do Mexicans eat when it's cold out?

Brrrritos

πŸ‘︎ 10k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Trtlman
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2020
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Ive been reading this book called β€œThe A to Z of Northern Europe”, but it’s taking me ages...

Not sure I’ll ever get to the Finish

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/iamdecal
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2020
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A group of German geologists recently made an interesting discovery within a mountain range of northern Italy

The team unearthed a layer of rock tessellations resembling a violin as viewed from behind.

As of yet they have no name for this strata variance.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Raidenisme
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2020
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U2 is having a concert in northern Ireland.

Halfway through the show, the music stops and Bono stands middle stage clapping his hands every few seconds. "Every time I clap my hands, a child in Africa dies" Without missing a beat, from somewhere in the front of the crowd a man bellows out in a thick Irish accent: "Well stop fucking doing it ya evil bastard!"

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/facts_my_guyy
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2020
🚨︎ report
An Afghan, an Albanian, an Algerian, ...

an American, an Andorran, an Angolan, an Antiguans, an Argentine, an Armenian, an Australian, an Austrian, an Azerbaijani, a Bahamian, a Bahraini, a Bangladeshi, a Barbadian, a Barbudans, a Batswanan, a Belarusian, a Belgian, a Belizean, a Beninese, a Bhutanese, a Bolivian, a Bosnian, a Brazilian, a Brit, a Bruneian, a Bulgarian, a Burkinabe, a Burmese, a Burundian, a Cambodian, a Cameroonian, a Canadian, a Cape Verdean, a Central African, a Chadian, a Chilean, a Chinese, a Colombian, a Comoran, a Congolese, a Costa Rican, a Croatian, a Cuban, a Cypriot, a Czech, a Dane, a Djibouti, a Dominican, a Dutchman, an East Timorese, an Ecuadorean, an Egyptian, an Emirian, an Equatorial Guinean, an Eritrean, an Estonian, an Ethiopian, a Fijian, a Filipino, a Finn, a Frenchman, a Gabonese, a Gambian, a Georgian, a German, a Ghanaian, a Greek, a Grenadian, a Guatemalan, a Guinea-Bissauan, a Guinean, a Guyanese, a Haitian, a Herzegovinian, a Honduran, a Hungarian, an I-Kiribati, an Icelander, an Indian, an Indonesian, an Iranian, an Iraqi, an Irishman, an Israeli, an Italian, an Ivorian, a Jamaican, a Japanese, a Jordanian, a Kazakhstani, a Kenyan, a Kittian and Nevisian, a Kuwaiti, a Kyrgyz, a Laotian, a Latvian, a Lebanese, a Liberian, a Libyan, a Liechtensteiner, a Lithuanian, a Luxembourger, a Macedonian, a Malagasy, a Malawian, a Malaysian, a Maldivan, a Malian, a Maltese, a Marshallese, a Mauritanian, a Mauritian, a Mexican, a Micronesian, a Moldovan, a Monacan, a Mongolian, a Moroccan, a Mosotho, a Motswana, a Mozambican, a Namibian, a Nauruan, a Nepalese, a New Zealander, a Nicaraguan, a Nigerian, a Nigerien, a North Korean, a Northern Irishman, a Norwegian, an Omani, a Pakistani, a Palauan, a Palestinian, a Panamanian, a Papua New Guinean, a Paraguayan, a Peruvian, a Pole, a Portuguese, a Qatari, a Romanian, a Russian, a Rwandan, a Saint Lucian, a Salvadoran, a Samoan, a San Marinese, a Sao Tomean, a Saudi, a Scottish, a Senegalese, a Serbian, a Seychellois, a Sierra Leonean, a Singaporean, a Slovakian, a Slovenian, a Solomon Islander, a Somali, a South African, a South Korean, a Spaniard, a Sri Lankan, a Sudanese, a Surinamer, a Swazi, a Swede, a Swiss, a Syrian, a Taiwanese, a Tajik, a Tanzanian, a Togolese, a Tongan, a Trinidadian or Tobagonian, a Tunisian, a Turkish, a Tuvaluan, a Ugandan, a Ukrainian, a Uruguayan, a Uzbekistani, a Venezuelan, a Vietnamese, a Welshman, a Yemenite, a Zambian and a Zimbabwean all go to a nightclub...

The doorman stops the

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 111
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Chainz4Dayz
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2020
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You can’t spell the northern most Scandinavian country without the letter β€œR”.

There would be No_way.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LouieNet
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do the subway drivers in a northern Italian city keep quitting?

They find it too hard to work under Brescia

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/vabune
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2020
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A company that makes powerful pick up trucks in a northern city of England started by a famous Icelandic electronic pop artist.

It's BjΓΆrk's York Torque Corp.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dhdoctor
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2019
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What do Scottish people use to wipe after using the bathroom?

Kilted Northern

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2020
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British police confirm that an entire northern town has gone missing

unfortunately, they have no Leeds

πŸ‘︎ 5k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/demon969
πŸ“…︎ May 17 2017
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They also have a shipping number
πŸ‘︎ 953
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jhaiden
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2020
🚨︎ report
Those northern canadians can smell a liar a mile away

And they wont have Nunavut

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2020
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What part of northern Canada is habitable?

Nunavut

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Thats_Folked_Up
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2019
🚨︎ report
I took my gf Alice to see the Northern lights

She didn’t seem interested, so I asked...

Does the Aurora BoreyouAlice?

πŸ‘︎ 32
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Blame-runner
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2018
🚨︎ report
What did Justin Timberlake say when the lead singer of Weezer asked him to name a major peninsula on the northern coast of the Black Sea?

Crimea, Rivers.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/underdog_rox
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2019
🚨︎ report
If Southern California is called SoCal, why don’t we call Northern California...

Diet?

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ“…︎ Jul 05 2019
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When Northern Europe was bartering for its land, all they wanted was a little something to Sweden the deal.
πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/callenreese
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2019
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My friend caught hypothermia while painting outdoor scenes in Northern Canada.

Everyone thinks he needed a second coat.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2019
🚨︎ report
The flags of Northern Europe ipfs.pics/QmfEgrnja9ajfD6…
πŸ‘︎ 151
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dachewie
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2015
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While hiking thru the Northern Canadian Rocky Mountains, I came upon a large member of the deer family...

I thought I might have to fight for my life, but fortunately it had to "va-moose".

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2019
🚨︎ report
What Jewish light phenomenon occurs in the northern sky?

Menorah borealis

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HHStorm21
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2018
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I was sunbathing in Northern Spain when a local came up to me and gave me a bowl of soup.

It was a Basque bask bisque.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ToroZuzuX
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2018
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the guy who was sick and tired of living in northern Canada?

He wanted Nunavut.

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dye_Fledermau5
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2015
🚨︎ report
Why are people in Northern Asia so stressed out?

They're always Russian

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2018
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My new neighbor tried to convince me he was originally from Northern Canada...

But I was having Nunavut.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/_DavidH_
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2018
🚨︎ report
German-English baroque music played across northern Texas.

Texan Pan-Handel.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bigfoothobbit
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2017
🚨︎ report
I just watched this wonderful and touching movie about a chef in Northern China.

Set in Northern China, this movie follows the rite of passage of a jaded, aimless Chinese chef who falls in love with a worn out cooking pan that he and his friends once scorned. The two develop a powerful and inspirational relationship in which they discover truths about cooking that take most people a lifetime to learn. It's called A Wok to Remember

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πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2016
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What if Santa is really from northern Poland, and people just got confused when he said he was North Polish?

Tried this in /r/Showerthoughts but it didn't go over well...maybe too much of a pun?

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2015
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What is a fleet of helicopters called?

Hellacopters

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PanPitza
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Uncle took an Alaskan cruise. Asked how it was to see the Northern Lights

He said, β€œit gave me chills”

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hutimuti
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2018
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I heard they're wanting to change the name of the Northern Lights

They're looking for an Aurora Bore-alias.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rwaynick
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you call the Northern Lights after you get tired of watching them?

Aurora Bore-alis

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hansenator
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2017
🚨︎ report
Which piece of my deck furniture originated in Northern Africa?

Moroccan Chair.

Came up with this just now and made my girlfriend roll her eyes at me. Not a dad myself, but I hope you appreciate some OC!

πŸ‘︎ 31
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jeauxoxo
πŸ“…︎ Aug 29 2013
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I tried to get my girlfriend to go with me on a vacation to northern Canada...

But she wasn't having Nunavut.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sax45
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2014
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What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale?

A Northern fairytale begins with "Once upon a time..." A Southern fairytale begins with"Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit!"

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ“…︎ Jul 25 2016
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Last week in Warsaw the government asked its people how they felt about an expedition to stick large metal rods in the northern and southern ends of the globe.

it was the Poll of Poles on the pole poles.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zeinshver
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2014
🚨︎ report
Found this Roman around the internet
πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/grootisgod
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12 2018
🚨︎ report
An Afghan, an Albanian, an Algerian, an American, an Andorran

An Angolan, an Antiguans, an Argentine, an Armenian, an Australian, an Austrian, an Azerbaijani, a Bahamian, a Bahraini, a Bangladeshi, a Barbadian, a Barbudans, a Batswanan, a Belarusian, a Belgian, a Belizean, a Beninese, a Bhutanese, a Bolivian, a Bosnian, a Brazilian, a Brit, a Bruneian, a Bulgarian, a Burkinabe, a Burmese, a Burundian, a Cambodian, a Cameroonian, a Canadian, a Cape Verdean, a Central African, a Chadian, a Chilean, a Chinese, a Colombian, a Comoran, a Congolese, a Costa Rican, a Croatian, a Cuban, a Cypriot, a Czech, a Dane, a Djibouti, a Dominican, a Dutchman, an East Timorese, an Ecuadorean, an Egyptian, an Emirian, an Equatorial Guinean, an Eritrean, an Estonian, an Ethiopian, a Fijian, a Filipino, a Finn, a Frenchman, a Gabonese, a Gambian, a Georgian, a German, a Ghanaian, a Greek, a Grenadian, a Guatemalan, a Guinea-Bissauan, a Guinean, a Guyanese, a Haitian, a Herzegovinian, a Honduran, a Hungarian, an I-Kiribati, an Icelander, an Indian, an Indonesian, an Iranian, an Iraqi, an Irishman, an Israeli, an Italian, an Ivorian, a Jamaican, a Japanese, a Jordanian, a Kazakhstani, a Kenyan, a Kittian and Nevisian, a Kuwaiti, a Kyrgyz, a Laotian, a Latvian, a Lebanese, a Liberian, a Libyan, a Liechtensteiner, a Lithuanian, a Luxembourger, a Macedonian, a Malagasy, a Malawian, a Malaysian, a Maldivan, a Malian, a Maltese, a Marshallese, a Mauritanian, a Mauritian, a Mexican, a Micronesian, a Moldovan, a Monacan, a Mongolian, a Moroccan, a Mosotho, a Motswana, a Mozambican, a Namibian, a Nauruan, a Nepalese, a New Zealander, a Nicaraguan, a Nigerian, a Nigerien, a North Korean, a Northern Irishman, a Norwegian, an Omani, a Pakistani, a Palauan, a Palestinian, a Panamanian, a Papua New Guinean, a Paraguayan, a Peruvian, a Pole, a Portuguese, a Qatari, a Romanian, a Russian, a Rwandan, a Saint Lucian, a Salvadoran, a Samoan, a San Marinese, a Sao Tomean, a Saudi, a Scottish, a Senegalese, a Serbian, a Seychellois, a Sierra Leonean, a Singaporean, a Slovakian, a Slovenian, a Solomon Islander, a Somali, a South African, a South Korean, a Spaniard, a Sri Lankan, a Sudanese, a Surinamer, a Swazi, a Swede, a Swiss, a Syrian, a Tajik, a Tanzanian, a Togolese, a Tongan, a Trinidadian or Tobagonian, a Tunisian, a Turk, a Tuvaluan, a Ugandan, a Ukrainian, a Uruguayan, a Uzbekistani, a Venezuelan, a Vietnamese, a Welshman, a Yemenite, a Zambian and a Zimbabwean all go to a bar..

The doorman stops them and says sorry I can’t let you in without a T

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 143
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Frase32
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2019
🚨︎ report
A bar joke for y'all

An Afghan, an Albanian, an Algerian, an American, an Andorran, an Angolan, an Antiguans, an Argentine, an Armenian, an Australian, an Austrian, an Azerbaijani, a Bahamian, a Bahraini, a Bangladeshi, a Barbadian, a Barbudans, a Batswanan, a Belarusian, a Belgian, a Belizean, a Beninese, a Bhutanese, a Bolivian, a Bosnian, a Brazilian, a Brit, a Bruneian, a Bulgarian, a Burkinabe, a Burmese, a Burundian, a Cambodian, a Cameroonian, a Canadian, a Cape Verdean, a Central African, a Chadian, a Chilean, a Chinese, a Colombian, a Comoran, a Congolese, a Costa Rican, a Croatian, a Cuban, a Cypriot, a Czech, a Dane, a Djibouti, a Dominican, a Dutchman, an East Timorese, an Ecuadorean, an Egyptian, an Emirian, an Equatorial Guinean, an Eritrean, an Estonian, an Ethiopian, a Fijian, a Filipino, a Finn, a Frenchman, a Gabonese, a Gambian, a Georgian, a German, a Ghanaian, a Greek, a Grenadian, a Guatemalan, a Guinea-Bissauan, a Guinean, a Guyanese, a Haitian, a Herzegovinian, a Honduran, a Hungarian, an I-Kiribati, an Icelander, an Indian, an Indonesian, an Iranian, an Iraqi, an Irishman, an Israeli, an Italian, an Ivorian, a Jamaican, a Japanese, a Jordanian, a Kazakhstani, a Kenyan, a Kittian and Nevisian, a Kuwaiti, a Kyrgyz, a Laotian, a Latvian, a Lebanese, a Liberian, a Libyan, a Liechtensteiner, a Lithuanian, a Luxembourger, a Macedonian, a Malagasy, a Malawian, a Malaysian, a Maldivan, a Malian, a Maltese, a Marshallese, a Mauritanian, a Mauritian, a Mexican, a Micronesian, a Moldovan, a Monacan, a Mongolian, a Moroccan, a Mosotho, a Motswana, a Mozambican, a Namibian, a Nauruan, a Nepalese, a New Zealander, a Nicaraguan, a Nigerian, a Nigerien, a North Korean, a Northern Irishman, a Norwegian, an Omani, a Pakistani, a Palauan, a Palestinian, a Panamanian, a Papua New Guinean, a Paraguayan, a Peruvian, a Pole, a Portuguese, a Qatari, a Romanian, a Russian, a Rwandan, a Saint Lucian, a Salvadoran, a Samoan, a San Marinese, a Sao Tomean, a Saudi, a Scottish, a Senegalese, a Serbian, a Seychellois, a Sierra Leonean, a Singaporean, a Slovakian, a Slovenian, a Solomon Islander, a Somali, a South African, a South Korean, a Spaniard, a Sri Lankan, a Sudanese, a Surinamer, a Swazi, a Swede, a Swiss, a Syrian, a Tajik, a Tanzanian, a Togolese, a Tongan, a Trinidadian or Tobagonian, a Tunisian, a Turk, a Tuvaluan, a Ugandan, a Ukrainian, a Uruguayan, a Uzbekistani, a Venezuelan, a Vietnamese, a Welshman, a Yemenite, a Zambian and a Zimbabwean

All go to a bar

The doorm

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zarni1410
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2019
🚨︎ report

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