My love for my wife is like the national debt.

It's enormous. It seems likes it's been around forever. It is growing every day. It's something that will be passed onto our children and grandchildren.

πŸ‘︎ 60
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hoetted
πŸ“…︎ Feb 14 2021
🚨︎ report
How can there be a national coin shortage?

Makes no cents.

πŸ‘︎ 580
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/i_live_in_a_truck
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2020
🚨︎ report
What genre are national anthems?

Country

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/elitePP69lmao
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2020
🚨︎ report
What is the most sought after nation right now?

Vaccination.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/pohpia
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31 2021
🚨︎ report
Technically all national anthems

Are country music

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/d3athsdoor1
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2021
🚨︎ report
The nation of Iran lies between the ancient lands of Babylon to the west and the mountains of Afghanistan to the east...

In other words, it’s between Iraq and a hard place.

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/watercolorfiddle
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2020
🚨︎ report
What nationality makes the best Mechs?

Mechs-icans!

(Actually a kid joke from my boy)

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/biffbobfred
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2021
🚨︎ report
Today is National Sound Check Day

1 2 / 1 2

πŸ‘︎ 32
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thisisnotnorman
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2020
🚨︎ report
Have you seen the car crash at the national association for blind people?

Witnesses claim they didn't see it coming

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/5wiipr29
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2020
🚨︎ report
This tasty plant wasn't just a big dill, it was the National Anethum
πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/danarchist
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you know that you change nationalities when you really have to go to the bathroom?

When you’re trying to find the facilities, you’re Russian. Once you get there though, European.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/halokost
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2020
🚨︎ report
There's a department of the United Nations which tries to improve the quality of food in restaurants.

UNEEDCHEF

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/sodomicity
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2020
🚨︎ report
What does the director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases say when he stubs his toe?

Fouchy!

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2020
🚨︎ report
How many bodies are buried in Arlington National Cemetery?

All of them

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AwwwwwwYeahhhhhhh
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2020
🚨︎ report
The president of the National Referees Association has been arrested for corruption.

Investigators haven't released the name of the whistle-blower.

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/big_macaroons
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the Canadian racist when he heard the First Nations people were getting their own territory?

Well he was having Nunavut.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Malcolm_Y
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2020
🚨︎ report
What is the national dish of Sweden?

Swedish

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/equiinferno
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2020
🚨︎ report
I hurt myself while stacking up all my old National Geographics ...

Now, I have back issues.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MisterBigDude
πŸ“…︎ Oct 11 2020
🚨︎ report
What a sexist society we live in, today is National Daughter's Day and it's celebrated once a year.....

But we celebrate Son day every week!

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/heybuddy313
πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2020
🚨︎ report
Aang must be so proud
πŸ‘︎ 5k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AJSaporno
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18 2020
🚨︎ report
I once visited a country where a lot of people were called Yuri and it stank of pee.

It must have been the Yuri-nation.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Bbew_Mot
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2021
🚨︎ report
Sometimes nationality matters
πŸ‘︎ 62
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Roaming_Dinosaur
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2020
🚨︎ report
A man was sentenced to 20 years in prison when he inadvertently contaminated the food supply of 30 specimens of America’s national bird.

His actions were highly ill-eagle

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/linknt01
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you know, the national arcade game of Mexico is...

Gu-whack-a-mole

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/rekt555
πŸ“…︎ Oct 10 2020
🚨︎ report
Question

Why is today not National ballerina day?

I mean it is 2-2 after all

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/taterheadx2
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2021
🚨︎ report
Ron worked at Chihuahua Nation Incorporated.

One day, a blind customer came in with his chihuahua and demanded a return. β€œWhat’s wrong with your CNI dog, sir?” Ron asked. He yelled, β€œThis isn’t what I meant!”

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/morsodo99
πŸ“…︎ Sep 16 2020
🚨︎ report
A national coin shortage must provide some much needed relief for people who don’t like change.
πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jeepinmama
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2020
🚨︎ report
We will never run out of puns now!

A giant list of puns

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.

I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.

Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.

Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!

I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.

What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.

How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.

I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.

I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.

My cat was just sick on the carpet, I don’t think it’s feline well.

Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.

How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.

What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

There’s a new type of broom out, it’s sweeping the nation.

What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.

What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.

Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.

Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

The shovel was a ground breaking invention.

A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."

A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."

Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.

What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.

I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.

What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.

I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.

Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.

Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"

Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.

What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.

Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.

A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.

After the accident, the juggler didn’t have the balls to do it.

I used to be afraid of hu

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/communist_scumbag
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
🚨︎ report
My girlfriend is from another nation.

She’s from imagination.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2020
🚨︎ report
Allegedly there’s a national coin shortage

I asked someone to explain it to me and they didn’t make cents.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Bradb717
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2020
🚨︎ report
My friend from Paris took part in a national barista contest

And he won! I read it in the French press

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HiTek_142857
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2020
🚨︎ report
What nationality is Santa Claus?

North Polish

πŸ‘︎ 1k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/linkhandford
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2019
🚨︎ report
The national coin shortage is a problem that we can solve if we all...

Be the change that we wanna see.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Kinjesus
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2020
🚨︎ report
News broke today that due to salmonella concerns, there is a national recall on just about every type of onion in the united states...

To be honest, I'm not shedding any tears over it.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thejohnblog
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2020
🚨︎ report
My first time posting on my cake day!

What nationality is Santa Claus? North Poleish

Merry Christmas!!!

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/nbudri
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2020
🚨︎ report
Yesterday was national sewing day..

.. or so it seams

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/drk311
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2020
🚨︎ report
I have a spouse in a different nation.

The Imagination

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Manggg1
πŸ“…︎ Jun 16 2020
🚨︎ report
What genre is national anthems ?

Country

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2021
🚨︎ report
What genre of music are national anthems?

Country music

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/IAmTheSovietUnion
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2021
🚨︎ report
What genre are national anthems?

Country.

πŸ‘︎ 30k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/rupanath97
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Technically all national anthems are...

Country music

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/yourstangecousin
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2020
🚨︎ report
They should rename national anthems to...

...Country music.

πŸ‘︎ 166
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Anxious_Gay99
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2020
🚨︎ report
A giant list of puns from r/copypasta

A giant list of puns

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.

I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.

Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.

Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!

I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.

What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.

How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.

I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.

I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.

My cat was just sick on the carpet, I don’t think it’s feline well.

Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.

How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.

What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

There’s a new type of broom out, it’s sweeping the nation.

What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.

What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.

Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.

Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

The shovel was a ground breaking invention.

A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."

A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."

Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.

What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.

I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.

What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.

I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.

Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.

Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"

Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.

What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.

Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.

A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.

After the accident, the juggler didn’t have the balls to do it.

I used to be afraid of hu

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
🚨︎ report
There's a new type of broom out

Its sweeping the nation and the competition

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Russell_Pinto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2020
🚨︎ report
Technically, national anthems are just country music.
πŸ‘︎ 6k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/surgicalfunnel
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you hear the news about the shovel? It's ground breaking. But the broom?

That really swept the nation.

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/the_houser
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2020
🚨︎ report
There’s a new type of broom out

it’s sweeping the nation.

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/lolyfe-dc
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
🚨︎ report

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