To the person who stole my MS Office License.

I will find you. You have my Word.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Regclusive
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2021
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Why don't women like MS office

Because it's Micro and Soft

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Esmeralda_i
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2021
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Ms Wilson, Australian star of the Pitch Perfect movies has announced she no longer believes in Santa.

She is a Rebel without a Claus.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kouroshkeshavarz
πŸ“…︎ Apr 19 2021
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The Mandalorian came across Little Ms. Muffet having difficulty with her meal. He stopped to help, letting her know...

"These are the curds and this is the Whey."

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/drwheatie
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2021
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I hear Ms. Parton became a Buddhist teacher...

She's a Dolly lama!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2021
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Someone from Southern France sent me an MS Word file with 200 pages.

It's a Languedoc.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/notBjoern
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2020
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A Pun I Made In 5 Minutes On MS Paint... Merry Christmas!
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KLMkid10
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2019
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I bought a copy of MS Office, but I dropped it on the road going back to my car...

...well, that's the Word on the street.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KW-DadJoker
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2020
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Ms. Richie: Hey, remind me what comes after Do and Re on the musical scale?

Lionel: Hello, is it Mi you are looking for?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 26 2020
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Butterfingers and M&Ms are okay...

... but Mars Bars and Milky Way are out of this world!

(Not a great joke, but I've found its good for a few Snickers)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DrFurball
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2019
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I busted out MS Paint today
πŸ‘︎ 744
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mike_pants
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2018
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Why wouldn’t Ms. Potato Head marry Tom Brokaw?

He was just a common-tater.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bullhead20
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2020
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Everytime I open a bag of M&Ms it's like the final question in a round of Mastermind...

.... I've started, so I'll finish.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/queen_zombie
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2019
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True story: I wanted to print a dozen copies of a document, but selected 'Number of Copies: 12' on both MS Word and the printer itself, just to be sure. Turns out, it treated that as 12 times 12 copies.

I soon discovered that I had made a gross error of judgment.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheAnagramancer
πŸ“…︎ Sep 11 2019
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I’m sorry Ms. Jackson..
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DrunkOnOrange
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2018
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A frog hops into the credit union and meets with his loan officer, Ms. Black. She asks if he has any collateral for the loan?

The frog pulls out a small weird shaped item, made of ceramic. Ms. Black isn’t sure what to make of it, so she asks her manager. He takes one look at the item, and says, β€œWhy that’s a knick knack Patty Black, give that frog a loan!”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/iamkeerock
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2019
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How would Kermit and Ms Piggy get married?

Pastor of Muppets, pulling the strings...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PowerRaptor
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25 2018
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Gallman, MS

So driving home last night, as we pass the Interstate exit for Gallman, MS, my 16 year old daughter remarks "Wow, they sure do have some gall, man."

I have never been more proud.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/scotch-o
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2019
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The Spanish branch of Microsoft worked on a successor to MS-DOS for years

Sadly, MS-TRES never became popular.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Re4l1ty
πŸ“…︎ Nov 03 2018
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I need to immediately upgrade my version of MS Office.

For lack of a better Word.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2018
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I could make a lot of money if I tore the label off of a bag of M&Ms and rename them "purified trail mix"
πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2019
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Anything except MS Paint is for amateurs.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DankOfTheEndless
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28 2017
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The doctor told the patient that he had MS.

The patient responded,"that's unnerving".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Theeclat
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2018
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Mr. Mushroom asked Ms. Brocoli for a date...

She said 'no'. He said, "Why not? I'm a fun guy."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SpecOpsAlpha
πŸ“…︎ Sep 20 2017
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My favourite thing to say whenever I'm eating M&Ms

I take an M&M and turn it so the M is upside down and I say, "Hey they put the M on upside-down on this one!" Gets occasional chuckle.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shipless_Captain
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2017
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How do M and Ms keep in touch?

Smartiephones.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bigfoothobbit
πŸ“…︎ Jan 26 2017
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If you sleep with Ms. Incredible, it's only an average performance

Cause you're on Helen Parr

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πŸ‘€︎ u/geckothegeek42
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2017
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FIFA Games are a lot like Ms Frizzle

Take chances, make mistakes, and get Messi!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mpo9
πŸ“…︎ Feb 19 2016
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Ms. Voorhees

When I was in fifth grade, I had a teacher called Ms. Voorhees. Every single day when I was going to the bus stop my dad would yell at me "Don't forget to ask how Jason's doing!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Germanfries
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2013
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To the person who stole my MS Office, I will find you.

You have my word.

πŸ‘︎ 103
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 06 2018
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To the person who stole my MS Office, I will find you.

You have my Word.

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2018
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