Perhaps they can shed some light on what it's like there
But stealing from this bakery really takes the cake.
A fish in sea
So I have an uncle, once removed.
Good, he said. Take these drinks to table nine.
They're to prevent meltdowns.
Guess I caught M-all
Can't wait to see their faces when they realize they have a puppy.
He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patty Whack.
"Miss Whack, I'd like to get a $30,000 loan to take a holiday."
Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's okay, he knows the bank manager.
Patty explains that he will need to secure the loan with some collateral.
The frog says, "Sure. I have this," and produces a tiny porcelain elephant, about an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed.
Very confused, Patty explains that she'll have to consult with the bank manager and disappears into a back office.
She finds the manager and says, "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000, and he wants to use this as collateral." She holds up the tiny pink elephant. "I mean, what in the world is this?"
The bank manager looks back at her and says, "It's a knickknack, Patty Whack. Give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."
I think I managed to cover my tracks.
I don’t know what to call it!!!! It keeps s-Karen me!!!!
“Like £10 notes” I told him
Ctrl,shift,esc.
(Task manager shortcut)
Congee-rat-lations 😬😬😬
... He always avoid the stakeholders.
When I asked how he managed to keep count,
He replied, "I keep a log"
My secretary looked extra beautiful in that light and atmosphere!
You cantaloupe!
I just lost it.
A woman asked me to check her balance so I pushed her over.
I think that's a record
Yes my horse is a Mustang and it mustang somewhere!
Set to be called the Google Chromosome.
It was my first order of business
A very skilled attorney interviews for a job at a prestigious firm. The managing partner looks over his resume and exclaims with glee, “Oh my goodness! You’re so experienced! You’re hired, and you can name your salary!”
The interviewee paused for a moment and said “Thank you. I’d like to call mine Dennis.”
A bad project manager makes up dates.
“Cardamom”
Because he’s a stable genius.
Everybody thought the game was a real trainwreck
Hats off to them for getting that passed
Nothing, they fast!
So a colleague is leaving my work (transfusion medicine lab) to work as an information manager for the organ transplant service. I make cards and I’m trying to think up something punny to write on/in his card and I’ll paint a picture on the front for context. I was thinking like “bloody good luck” or “sorry you’re transplanting”... but less shitty!
Thanks in advance :)
"Well, I guess you can say...I solved the case!!"
I’m the C I E I O
if he'd lettuce
He used the toilet-trees.
Supplies!
I feel so defeeted.
Me: Thanks for reminding me.
What are the odds?
I had to get a running start, but I managed it.
She wanted the Task Manager.
Regular workers must wear small face shields, while Managers get to use the super-visors.
So, I have an uncle, once removed.
So, I have an uncle once removed.
I have an uncle, once removed.
