My girlfriend thought I'd be lonely after she broke up with me,
Little did she know that I immediately bought stocks just to have some company.
What do you call a lonely satellite?
https://preview.redd.it/dhtn36un8qw61.png?width=960&format=png&auto=webp&s=44a92e65eec7b2fa52bc6e3a0b70bc354bf8546a
You hear about the retiree who opened a bar for lonely roofers?
It was a shingles bar...
🥸
He must feel lonely at (k)night
What do you call lonely cheese?
Sent this to my gf cuz I felt lonely.
I was feeling lonely so I bought shares of GameStop stock.
I just wanted some company.
Ronald McDonald was lonely.
So God made a woman for him from his McRib.
What do you call a lonely and cheesy joke
Why is a lion never lonely?
If you are feeling lonely during the Covid lockdown, why not buy some shares?
It’s always nice to have a bit of company.
Why are skeletons so lonely?
Because they have no body.
Why was the anteater so lonely?
Cause there’s no such thing as an uncle-eater
A lonely tobacconist signed up to Tinder.
Unfortunately, he couldn't find a match.
Why are skeletons so lonely?
I was lonely until I glued a coffee cup to the roof of my car
Why did the lonely chess player go to Czechoslovakia?
Because he wanted a Czech mate!
Ghosts are so lonely that...
Why are breads always lonely?
The semicolon was invented because the colon was lonely...
It just wanted a little comma-raderie.
If you are feeling lonely during the lockdown, try buying a few shares from the financial market.
Then you’ll have a little bit of company.
Why don’t palm trees ever get lonely?
Because they have lots of fronds.
My daughter has been particularly moody and lonely recently...
Perhaps it’s because she’s a quaranteen.
Why is 1 such a lonely number?
Because people only ever say I love you too.
It’s lonely between Germany and Spain
Not many France, nobody’s Nice to me, everyone seems to be Lyon. It’s just Eiffel
So you all feel a bit less post ma-lonely
What’s the only fruit that never gets lonely?
What state did the lonely cow moo to?
This bicycle is lonely. It has no body.
If you're ever feeling lonely, just remember...
Why was the skeleton so lonely?
Because he ain't got no body.
In the forest, a sad lonely looking turtle begins to climb slowly up a huge tree. Half way up, it edges along a branch, sighs, then jumps. It falls smacking into the ground, bouncing and tumbling across the forest floor...
Recovering and bruised, he slowly climbs the tree again, jumps and falls to the ground.
The turtle tries again and again, while a couple of birds sitting on a branch watch his pathetic efforts.
Finally, the female bird turns to her mate, “Darling, don't you think it’s time to tell him he’s adopted?"
Why did the lonely millionaire sell the majority of his business?
He wanted a little company.
Why do batteries feel lonely?
Because they are never included in anything.
Some Dadjoke advice for all the lonely hearts out there
Here's what you should do:
Step 1: Buy a sheep
Step 2: name it "Relation"
And now... *drumroll* ... you have a relationsheep
Why did the lonely man work on his days off?
Why was the variable so lonely?
Because everyone isolated them
What kind of car does a lonely golfer drive?
Why was the skeleton lonely?
I was feeling lonely so I bought some shares
It's nice to have some company
My cheese is great at being lonely...
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