They always wanted a father figure.
Because everyone is married.
So I went home and put on some carstop shorts, and had much better success at hitchhiking after that.
I said "Go on then!!"
Now I'm doing 12 years for a crime I didn't commit.
People must be stuck in it
The worst fruit allergy I've ever seen.
But parking 200 cars, now that requires a lot.
Nothing happens, You don't take a photo of anything with a wheel, you use a camera/mobile phone instead.
Guess it’s true what they say, you can not hit what you can Nazi
I guess nobody Reddit.
From reality.
Which was really strange, since I'd thought that I had left her at home looking after the kids.
Because they have little antibodies.
Or Can I say I graduated my Bachelor's Degree?
It is just a mono-log.
But then I got married and we bought a second night stand.
I said YES. And she said "Cool' and took the chair to her table for her boyfriend.
But I have no idea how to tell if a lemon is in a relationship or not
Maybe I could be her new taste in men
Bought-a-Bing, Bought-a-boom
They both got six months.
State-of-the-Ark technology
Now that I listen to full albums, I hardly ever leave the house.
It's called "I Don't Want a Snot for Christmas"
A trophy!!!
It was always so jaded.
He was sailing on the seven C’s
Age 6 they were separated in a successful 13hr surgery. Later in life they went to prison for armed robbery. They served 10yrs. Afterwards they wrote their book about being ex-con joined twins.
She responded, “ because you are ugly!”
He scored a home run every single at bat, and always the exact same way. Way over right field, too high for anyone to reach, and it always landed in exactly the 17th row of the stands, give or take a couple feet.
He earned the nickname “the machine” for how consistently he hit the exact same spot every time. Right field, 17th row, every single time. He did this for 20 years before he retired. Tickets to the 2-3 seats that the ball always landed on sold for over $2k a pop by the time he retired because you were guaranteed at least a couple home run balls.
And the day he retired a reporter asked him “How does it feel to be retiring as the greatest hitter of all time?”
Hugh just looked at the reporter puzzled. “What do you mean?” He said.
The reporter clarified “literally over 5,000 times you went to the plate and hit a home run to right field, 17th row of the stands!”
Hugh looked dejected and disappointed “yeah, my greatest failure...”
“What do you mean?” Said the reporter incredulously.
Hugh let’s out a long sigh, and looked down at the ground quietly for a moment before finally speaking.
“I’ve been aiming left this whole time”
I guess I'm suffering from 'stalk home' syndrome.
“...cereal killer.”
He was absolutely delighted.
He painted loads of them
...that only happens once in a blue moon.
We are in a very serious relationship.
