Punstoppable
A list of puns related to "Lawyers"
He is in a cent
He could never pass the bar
Because he had lots of experience in sewing.
Expunge Bob
Because they can never just pass a bar.
He didn't mind cause he was practicing
Pro-vlono
‘Cause it was in a jam!
De’bait’!
or, alternate punchline:
Bating tactics!
Call myself the bar inspector
Cop: But you are the lawyer? Me: Then where’s my present?
Because that would be
E-legal.
She was filing suits.
Just so I can say, "Your honour!! My client clearly isn't a flight risk."
Sounds like a huge pain in the butt
They're very affordable, but you have to build your own case.
Ace attorney's
Judge - Yes, that's assault!
Lawyer - I know it's a salt but is it a crime?
"I rest my case."
Tailor: you said the there was one hole the pocket only, there are definitely more! Lawyer: I lied, sew me!
Apparently deep down they are good people.
Everything he did was pro Bono
He was Diss-Bard.
His stage name "Diss-Bard"
I have a mother-in-law.
They'll add consult to injury
There’s no way he’ll succeed without his legal briefs.
Dad calls him "Chop Suey."
Legal briefs
I can’t take credit for this joke; I got it from Frasier.
The policeman says “You are the lawyer!”
“Exactly, so where’s my present?” Replies the lawyer.
He asks the nurse why the blinds are drawn.
She says, "There's a fire outside and we didn't want you to think the operation was a failure."
I'll be suing ya !
A cesium and desist letter.
A father-in-law
Help! I’ve been framed.
The first one claims his client is trapped in a penny. Answering the second lawyer's confused look, he says, "My client is in a cent."
the second lawyer nods, then says, "Well. My client is a fish head steeped in hot water. You could say he's gill tea."
Me: So where’s my present?!
Debate.
A lawsuit
The lawyer shrieks, "Exactly! So where’s my present?!"
Legal briefs
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