Justified Puns

I really like her fairer moans

The first one was probably justified, the the second one was just re-volting.

The N’s justify the means.

http://i.imgur.com/IDcfdGB.png

My dad used to always say "DAMN" when my sister and I were little (he still does).

We used to always say "Daddy stop saying that! It's a bad word."

He would always reply "It's not a bad word, that's what beavers build!"

Now I say damn all the time.

Anytime someone looks at her she starts justifying her actions

But I felt it was justified

It was entirely justified!

But part of me feels justified because one would have been enough

It wasn’t justified.

People would routinely bring him bread in an attempt to get him to eat. What people don't understand though is that Gandhi was actually a very temperamental man, and prone to anger. So even when his friends and family were the ones bringing him bread, he would take it and hurl it at them, sometimes leaving bruises and welts. He justified it by saying it was all a part of his philosophy of naan-violence.

When the winner was asked how she could justify the expense for old towels? Her response was that it is still the best way to dry Hoff.

But she’s a housefly so it’s totally justified.

Affirmed!

Wife (making sandwiches and referring to the end slices of bread): “Do you want the ends?”

Me: as long as they justify the means.”

Wife: (groans)

a group of crows spaced evenly between two margins is a justified murder.

The ends justify the mean.

As they say, the n’s justify the means.

Coworker: This is a racket. How do they justify charging an extra $3000 for something like sodium bicarbonate?

Me: Right? It's not like it's some fancy, top-secret compound. It's pretty basic.

My other coworker is a chem major about to enter grad school. He made me go work in the corner for a while after that one.

Superfight is a tabletop game where you make a character with random attributes from the selection of cards dealt to yourself. You will need to justify how your character and their attributes can beat your opponent's character.

We were playing this through Tabletop Simulator and I played a character card titled "Leonardo".

Gf: Dicaprio or Da Vinci

Me: No, DaTurtle

Me: "You've been reading that book for a really long time. Does it suck?"
Wife: "Not really. It's mostly just heavy"
Me: "I could get you a little stand to hold it if you would like."
Wife: doesn't look up from book as i stare at her "I'm not going to justify that with anything"