I keep imagining I’m holding an invisible pack of cards.

No one knows what I’m dealing with.

πŸ‘︎ 52
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πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2019
🚨︎ report
It's weird being colorblind in an art gallery. Everything's a pigment of the imagination.
πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CatsCreepMeowt
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2021
🚨︎ report
Can you imagine running into a Greek Gorgon?

I'd be petrified

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/zsm1994
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2021
🚨︎ report
Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight

There would be mass confusion.

πŸ‘︎ 88
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SlovenianGregor
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2020
🚨︎ report
Imagine the waters being filled with orange flavoured soda

That's my fanta sea

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/M_OrangeJu
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2021
🚨︎ report
RIP
πŸ‘︎ 5k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/M_Arslan_Tahir
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2021
🚨︎ report
Imagine being held at gunpoint by (bear with me) a literate animal, and the only hope of rescue is (BEAR WITH ME) posting a coded message on social media.

wHo the hEll would beLieve such a thing can hapPen.

πŸ‘︎ 13k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SocialPerformer
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Imagine a form of public transportation where there is no monetary fee but you relive past mistakes for as long as you are a passenger
πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/C0LL3CT
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Imagine how stressful it would be to be a ski.

I mean, there’s so much pressure on you all the time.s

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/christmasbush
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2020
🚨︎ report
Imagine if you walked into a bar and there was a long line of people waiting to take a swing at you.

That's the punch line.

πŸ‘︎ 52
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πŸ‘€︎ u/a_L_v_e_S
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2020
🚨︎ report
I like to imagine that the guy who invented the umbrella was going to call it the 'brella'....

But he hesitated.

πŸ‘︎ 35
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Imagine Dragons
πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mr-ariyo
πŸ“…︎ Feb 03 2020
🚨︎ report
Imagine you're in a pitch dark room and you have no idea how to escape.

Just stop imagining.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KrisyGGgamer23
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Ho ho ho!
πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ajfoucault
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2020
🚨︎ report
Elon Musk and Bill Gates teamed up and created an erectile dysfunction pill.

It's called Elongates

πŸ‘︎ 60
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PocketPapa22
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2021
🚨︎ report
I imagine when Microsoft's co-founder Mr.Gates gets a suit tailored, they must fit him perfectly.

They have to fit the Bill.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2020
🚨︎ report
I overdosed on Viagra once....

Hardest day of my life.

πŸ‘︎ 178
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MBMV
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12 2021
🚨︎ report
πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/giantyetifeet
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05 2021
🚨︎ report
Imagine the Titanic with a lisp

It’s unthinkable

πŸ‘︎ 56
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mycorona69
πŸ“…︎ Jul 13 2020
🚨︎ report
Imagine how tired Michelangelo was by the time he had finished painting..

..the sixteenth Chapel

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HugoZHackenbush2
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2020
🚨︎ report
I had a dream that I invented a new color

But when I woke up I realized it was just a pigment of my imagination.

πŸ‘︎ 115
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2021
🚨︎ report
"Honey, who might bee at the front door?"
πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Banoooooooo
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Whenever I go to bed I imagine I'm a cop

I go under cover.

πŸ‘︎ 51
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πŸ‘€︎ u/borna761
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2020
🚨︎ report
I have a serious question...

So imagine you are transexual but suddenly one day you decide to stop being it. Then you are Trans former?

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Blaset
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2021
🚨︎ report
Can you just imagine how pterosaurs felt seeing that meteor entering the earths atmosphere?

Probably pterofied.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MasterNova924
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Can you imagine if your dog was an undercover reporter?

They’d be able to dig up so much dirt on you.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AdamAptor
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2020
🚨︎ report
honestly, Imagine.
πŸ‘︎ 133
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Holiday_Volume
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2019
🚨︎ report
If alcohol can damage your short term memory

Imagine the damage alcohol can do.

πŸ‘︎ 100
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nav_the_gamer
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2021
🚨︎ report
Imagine if vampires had blunt teeth and couldn't bite you

They would just suck

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Summetz
πŸ“…︎ Jul 06 2020
🚨︎ report
My son came up to me and said that a bug was flying around his room, my wife said that he just imagined it.

I said that is justaflyable.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AlexNoru
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2020
🚨︎ report
This is (practically) the corniest gift imaginable. At the bottom of the soon to be gift wrapped box of corniness was a pair of Korn tickets for my lady...who enjoys my corny puns.
πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mr-JasonTe
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2020
🚨︎ report
A farmer said to me β€œI have 68 sheep. Can you help round them up for me?”

I said sure. 70.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rfcoc
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Told my wife I was quitting my job today to become an electrician

She was shocked.

πŸ‘︎ 67
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πŸ‘€︎ u/yet-another-dad
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2020
🚨︎ report
Can't imagine someone not understanding what erectile dysfunction is

I mean, it's not hard.

πŸ‘︎ 8k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/GoliathTheTitan
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Her: Honey can you pick up some milk

Him:* lifts gallon * done

Her: no from the store

Him: I imagine it weighs the same there too

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DJonesy007
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2021
🚨︎ report
Imagine eating a clock...

That would be time consuming...

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2020
🚨︎ report
I went to see a psychiatrist to get over my crippling fear of palindromes.

The bastard put me on Xanax!

πŸ‘︎ 37
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/klwill1192
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2020
🚨︎ report
Not cool Dad...not cool

So my dad's telling my relatives the story of how my mom was in labor for 12 hours so they named me 'Laura' which if you say it in Vietnamese accent it's 'Lau-ra' which means "Long time to come out"...

IMAGINE FINDING OUT AFTER 21 YEARS YOUR NAME IS A FUCKING PUN ..

πŸ‘︎ 66
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πŸ‘€︎ u/stneutron
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2020
🚨︎ report
Name woes... translation: imagine the difficulty when she is ashes what her name is by French people..
πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Slipstreme
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16 2020
🚨︎ report
I keep imagining I'm holding an invisible pack of cards.

No one knows what I'm dealing with.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/simplyGagi
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2019
🚨︎ report
Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight

There would be mass confusion

πŸ‘︎ 229
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Alluxin_
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2020
🚨︎ report
Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight

There would be a mass confusion

πŸ‘︎ 150
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DeletedForSpamm
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2020
🚨︎ report
Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms over night

There would be MASS confusion

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/300_Black0ut
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2020
🚨︎ report
Imagine if America switched from pounds to kilograms overnight.

There'd be mass confusion.

πŸ‘︎ 196
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cyclopropagative
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2020
🚨︎ report
Imagine the titanic with a lisp..

It’s unthinkable

πŸ‘︎ 218
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/LTenaciouSD
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight.

There would be a mass confusion

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/throwawaytrol7134
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2020
🚨︎ report

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