Headbutting Puns

It was a ram-done act of violence

But he just keeps headbutting people.

One bigger goat was headbutting the smaller ones, and I had to say:

"Most of these are billy goats, but that one's a bully goat"

Once upon a time Quasimodo was growing old and wanted to retire. Before he could, he had to hire someone new to ring the bells of the Church of Notre Dame in his place. He placed an ad in the newspaper but only one man showed up for the interview. This man happened to have no arms. The man begged Quasimodo to give him a chance, and that despite his appearance he could indeed perform the duties of the job. Quasimodo eventually caved and gave him a chance. The next day at 1:00 sharp they met in the bell tower. The man with no arms takes a wide stance near the edge of the room and charges directly towards the bell at a dead sprint. He smacks the bell squarely with his head and it produces a wonderful sonorous ring. Pleased with the results, Quasimodo tells him that if he can continue to ring the bell for the rest of the day he has the job. 2:00 passes and the man with no arms headbuts the bell twice, at 3:00 three times, and on and on until at 12:00 he produces only 11 rings before he was so disoriented and concussed that he charges right past the bell, over the railing, and falls to his death. The next day when the police investigate the mysterious death of an unknown man with no arms Quasimodo was asked if he knew anything about the dead man. He told them " I don't know his name, but his face sure rings a bell"

I work at a pub and this was after hours when we were cleaning up.

Coworker 1: "Some guy tried to headbutt me tonight because I asked him to move whilst i was mopping"

Coworker 2: "Aha, what a nutter!"

Groans were had.

Not sure if it's just a UK thing, but 'nutting' someone is slang (I think) for headbutting someone.