Haveli Puns

I wasn’t feeling quite like myself one day, so when she ran to me and shouted, “Aluminum!” I responded, “Can it! My plans have been foiled and I’m not in the mood to scrap.”

I'm planning a murder mystery game (you know, where everyone has a character and whatever) and they always have pun titles, but I'm stuck.

It's set in the future, in a semi-dystopian steam punk-inspired kinda setting. A scientist was murdered, while doing research into a new drug that would have had questionable effects on society. I know it's not much to go by, but any ideas?

EDIT: thanks heaps everyone! You guys are awesome!

Theoretical Fizz-ics

We'll see about that...

Nell, Edna, Leon, Nedra, Anita, Rolf, Nora, Alice, Carol, Leo, Jane, Reed, Dena, Dale, Basil, Rae, Penny, Lana, Dave, Denny, Lena, Ida, Bernadette, Ben, Ray, Lila, Nina, Jo, Ira, Mara, Sara, Mario, Jan, Ina, Lily, Arne, Bette, Dan, Reba, Diane, Lynn, Ed, Eva, Dana, Lynne, Pearl, Isabel, Ada, Ned, Dee, Rena, Joel, Lora, Cecil, Aaron, Flora, Tina, Arden, Noel, and Ellen.

If you get fired, you still have to show up the next day.

They say it’s a blast from the past!

*credit to my 9 year old daughter

Hindus, on the other hand, never had any beef.

It's half empty.

Because, they use honeycombs.

I think she is in love with me.

For example, I know what all you are thinking right now. "It's spelt psychic, you idiot. "

Cause they lactose

"Well son , now that you have got a kid of your own, i think it's time to give you this."

"Dad you don't mean-"

"Yes son ,i do" Dad pulls out the copy of 1001 Dad Jokes,5th Edition

"Dad... i am honoured..." , He says , tears sparkling in his eyes.

"Hi honoured" , replies his father , "i'm dad".

Then how can it choo choo?

Complements of my 6 year old.

I burst into tears. 12 years old and he still doesn’t know my name is Brian.

I call it my trail mix

I haven't touched it in years.

a Brrrrr-ito

"Don't worry," he replies, "It's carrion."

I hope it's not terminal.

You don’t know what you’re missing

I just see it rising up.

Unbelievable

It’s due to my weekend immune system

Exactly. Because they're damn good at it!

So he gave it to her.

I will find you. You have my Word.

I wasn't too bad, but I could have been grater.

First I find a hat full of money then I get chased by an angry dude with a guitar.

So they can see the battlefield

Xfinity