My six year old just cooked this up; you're welcome.
He told me it was bread in captivity.
I was reading through current articles of world news today and came across this relatively lighthearted article. My Father's response made it even better.
Iceland will halt construction of a new road as they have received concerns about the safety of elf habitats.
My father determined that the department responsible for this decision was the "Department of Elf and Safety".
So I'm visiting home in Chicago, and my father took my daughter and I to the zoo. We're at the lion habitat and my dad says to my daughter:
"Hey, you know what that lion is doing? He's just lion around!"
And not 2 seconds later I hear another dad tell his kids:
"Hey! The lion just jumped! Haha no, I'm lion."
Immediately after another dad to his kids:
"You know you can't trust lions, because they're always lion to ya!"
Please send help
It's called habitat for huge manatees.
Because its habitat was fragmented
I’m going to a used car dealership to watch them in their natural habitat
I work at a pet store and our order of reptiles came in...
Me: I soaked the new guys and put em in there habitats.
Manager: how are they looking?
Me: Good but there's something about the new chameleon.. he might be a problem
Manager: Whats wrong with him?
Me: I don't trust him, he's got shifty eyes
Manager: Oh god, go get ready for the cricket shipment please.
Edit: wall of text
I was at the zoo with my girlfriend and we went to the primates area last. When we got there, they had already put the gorillas up and there was a zookeeper in the open-air habitat cleaning it up. I turned to my girlfriend and said, "why is that gorilla wearing clothes?" My girlfriend groaned and the zookeeper shot me the dirtiest look I've ever received in my life.