A cryptic cop in a Coptic crypt.
SIR PRIZE!
I’m on season eight. Still not sure what this has to do with security.
The German coast guard officer replies "Vell, vat are you sinking about"?
But as anyone that has worked the night shift knows it can be a long and boring affair. No great threats to defend against. So this knight decided to improve himself, night after night he would bring books to read while he stood guard. Learning languages, math, philosophy. The smarter he gets the more he realizes that he will likely leave the world and be forgotten. In his depression he turns to music, learning instrument after instrument, style after style. Using his knowledge of math to create beautiful patterns and moving songs. He learns that it is they rhythm more than anything that draws people to a song and sets his nights to finding the rhythm that will be universally loved. Now, hundreds of years after his death, people the world over still remember Sir Cadian's Rhythm.
You're in,mate!
Seeing this, a robber sneaked past, and when the boss ended up being in the next room, the boss asked, “how’d you get past security?” In response to this, the robber said “you let your guard down.”
He’s my Guardian
No tres passing.”
Daughter : Whats Nana's middle name?
Me: the same as mommies, I think
Daughter: her middle name is just i think?
I'm so proud. Sorry if I don't know how to format, I tried.
A gardener.
I thought it was a little condescending.
The Go-stop-o
Because he was too far out, man
you shout "Donald, Duck" & everybody would just laugh
Or is that considered cheating?
When he wakes up, he's going to be a tan gent.
Guardians of the Galaxies
In German Prisoner-of-War camps, escapes were a major problem, so they would try to break the prisoners’ spirits by making them do mindless things. In particular, they would make the prisoners stand in a line and all move their heads like a clock back and forth and say, ‘tick tock tick tock.’
Some prisoners, unable to escape or otherwise change their situation, chose a very subtle rebellion. They would do the head motions, but instead of ‘tick tock tick tock’, they would wait until the guards were further down the line and switch to ‘tick tick tick.’
None of the guards noticed this was going on for many months, until finally, a young lieutenant was caught ticking by a senior SS Captain walking behind the line.
The captain stopped the exercise, walked over, face-to-face with the young man, and “A rebel. Vell, don’t vorry, ve have vays of making you tock.’
Cavity searches.
The pilot responds, "That's not going to fly."
The poolice
I tell everyone she’s into human trafficking.
The Warden said "he's a little condescending"
one watches cells and one sells watches
Try out this almost joke that my 8 year old used on me this morning …
Knock Knock.
Whose there?
Good.
Good who?
Good Morning, I love you.
……
……
He caught me off guard and turned me into a puddle.
Feel free to try it out on your unsuspecting loved ones. They’ll never see it coming from someone who is usually full of the jokes.
You can watch the kids, but don't Overwatch them.
That's just creepy...
They have to yell “Donald, Duck!”
Edit: whoever gave me the gold award, thank you so much. I would repay you in a way, but I don’t know who you are.
As if i care who that Guy F××××s.
Itch-guard.
A bouncer
Mid-knight.
The village elders looked at him and asked, "Didn't you just start your own religion? Ask your followers instead!"
He said, "No problem, I'll be back tomorrow."
The next day he showed up and asked for some bread.
The village elders looked at him and asked, "Doesn't your religion disavow physical needs? Transcend your hunger instead."
He said, "No problem, I'll be back tomorrow."
The next day he showed up and asked for some meat.
The village elders looked at him and asked "Doesn't your religion espouse vegetarianism? You should be asking for bread and vegetables instead."
He said, "I already did, but no problem..."
Finally, the elders called the village guards to get rid of that Hungry Buddha Pest.
They hold a con-test.
In the ship I saw the Master at Arms’ office and weapon storage was right near the ship’s bakery. It struck me as odd, until I realized that the Navy followed the same principles as the Army having the US gold in Fort Knox, surrounded by an armored force.
You have to be able to guard the dough.
I’m on season eight. Still not sure what this has to do with security.
I'm on season six so far, but not sure what it has to do with security.
Because he was too far out man.
I am on season 6 so far, but not sure what it has got to do with security.
The Guardians of the Galaxy
I say, “She’s into human trafficking.”
Guardians of the Galaxy
I'm on season 6 so far, but not sure what its got to do with security.
