Anytime someone looks at her she starts justifying her actions
He shut the whole league down this year!
Apple Turnover
...sorry for the riposte.
Is real.
to Pascal. He hopes to contain Cam Newton to a one meter square area.
I guess you can say it's my fort eh?
I had to do a quick test where one of the questions asked how humans normally breathe. The answers were; a) subconsciously b) rapidly c) under water or d) only when you need to
I answered c, and when the instructor told me I was wrong I replied that i thought my answer sounded a little fishy :)
Krav MAGA.
Because anything more than one is murder.
I guess it was too offensive
I've done that, but what do I do with the letter.
It was shelf defense.
They were just following the chicken!
I’ve had a lot on my plate recently
So I got real defensive
Karate is a method of self defense, while judo is what bagels are made from.
They were taught Kung Flu.
“In my defense, Your Honor, there were no signs of fowl play”
They have good D
Convict: Well if u r what you eat, I'm an innocent man.
(Credit to my man Bryce)
So they don't get assaulted.
Personally, I think it’s nuts
It was a brisk Saturday morning when Gerald arrived at “The Café,” a hip coffee shop right down the street. Wearing his large, burly black coat, he stared hesitantly at his watch. Thick glasses adorned his bright blue eyes, his gaze like starlight in a clear night sky. He was waiting, intently twiddling his thumbs. After a buzz of his phone, the message from Dad popped up: “Parking now, be there in 5.”
“Dad,” he whispered under his breath, swiping the message away to once again reveal the image on his lock-screen: a hazy picture of an ultrasound.
Gerald had not spoken to his father for three years. They had had a falling out, over which he did not remember. To him it was a competition of who could wait the longest without calling or sending a text. Who could wait the longest: him without a father, or his father without a son? The idea of friction in the relationship hurt like a thorn; piercing his soul more and more everyday. Until recently, out of the blue, “Dad” popped up on his phone. The rest is history. The rest leads to that Saturday morning, at The Café.
Bang! A car door rang out not too far from where Gerald stood. Gerald saw him. His father wore his tweed jacket like a coat of armor. His strut was now weaker than before they stopped talking; a weakness evident in his cane which supported every right step. His shortly trimmed white beard juxtaposed against his uncut, curly grey hair gave him the image of a wise wizard from a fairytale. He used to be that figure to Gerald, yet instead of a nice ancient being acting like a stone to keep him grounded, Gerald had felt as though his father was a rock pulling him deeper and deeper into a sea of monotony. Holding him back from his true potential. Maybe that was why he left? He still did not know.
“Hello, son,” came the withered voice Gerald had sook for so long, yet now that it had arrived wanted to avoid. “I can’t believe it’s been so long!”
“Yeah,” said Gerald, allowing a smile to grace his face. “Too long!”
Then they hugged, signifying a change in their relationship. Gerald had hoped something could happen to bring them closer together. He did not want to go on wondering what could have been. The regret and sadness weighed him down. Before starting a new family, Gerald wanted to be reacquainted with his own.
After finding their table and sitting down, the two began to discuss life. It was like old friends catching up after a long break. Although it took some time, Gerald began to warm u
... keep reading on reddit ➡To 45 it
Life in General
...it was purr-chased
I wouldn’t recommend anyone attack me in slow motion now…
He's pentagone
Says he was framed.
A martial artist!
Now that's offensive.
https://i.redd.it/4nxahotzfku11.jpg
As mentioned on /r/funny, it's a shame we don't know the actual joke used here.
Because 7 was a registered 6 offender
He was just doing asbestos he could!
He nearly kilt me. I poked him in the aye in defense.
Krav MAGA
Jew Dough!
In self defense, I put a steak through his heart
Sikh and destroy
Let us spray.
After all, they're sub-optimal.
