Came in from the cold and my girlfriend said “Your eyelashes are icicles!”
I said “and my balls are testicles”
Eyelashes are supposed to keep things from getting into your eyes, but when I do have something in my eye it's almost always an eyelash...
... how EYEronic!
You know what I do when someone pulls on my eyelashes?
I lash out.
if you attack someone with eyelashes does it mean you lash out at them
Why do eyelashes poke you in the eye?
Because they're lashing out!
An eyelash just fell into my dessert
Good thing I ordered eyes-cream
GF this morning: *Rubs my face* I have an eyelash
Me: yes, and you've got many more
Dadjoked my gf about her nipples
After sexy time last night, she goes "why do you always like my nipples so much?". I responded... "because without them your boobs are pointless". I died laughing and she sat there batting her eyelashes at me in disbelief.
What did the eye get from its dad after being naughty?
Eyelashes
Dadjoked my fiancée last night...
As she was doing her makeup in the car, she was looking around for something she lost.
Me: Did you lose your eyelash brush?
Her: Eyelash brush? That's not a thing.
Me: Sorry, eyelash comb.
Her: No! That's not a thing either!
Me: Hey now, there's no reason to lash out at me...
Her: glares
Eyelashes are supposed to prevent things from getting in your eyes but when I do have something in my eye, it's always an eyelash.
Eyeronic!
