What did the Dean Martin say when he went scuba diving?

That’s a moray!

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 09
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My brother and I are really competitive, and he just broke my record for deep sea diving.

This is a new low.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01
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A buddy of mine wanted me to go scuba diving..

I just couldn’t fathom the idea

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PrisonMike1111
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29
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I quit my job as a scuba diving instructor after my first day at work.

Deep down I realized it wasn’t for me.

πŸ‘︎ 64
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2019
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Is the pool safe for diving?

It deep ends.

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2019
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Why do blind people hate sky diving?

It scares the hell out of their dogs.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/simplyGagi
πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2019
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My friend wanted to go cliff diving but he had to take his emotional support device for unclogging using suction...

So he took the plunger.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2019
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I'm considering marrying a high earning ceo who doesn't want children, but I'm sad about the prospect of giving up my scuba diving hobby.

It's illegal to DINK and dive.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/arrenlex
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2019
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I applied for a job as an Instructor at a Scuba Diving center... The interviewer asked me if I can work well under pressure
πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dubaidadjokes
πŸ“…︎ Jul 13 2019
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What do you get for diving into a wave of oranges.

Vitamin Sea.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bbbbra
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2019
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I went deep sea diving and a mollusk wanted to give me a hug!

Damn cuddlefish always wanting to participate in PDAs...

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2019
🚨︎ report
I asked if the pool was safe for diving.

They said, β€œIt deep ends.”

πŸ‘︎ 36
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πŸ‘€︎ u/labink
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2019
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My friend was telling me about how a shark attacked her while she was diving

I told her, that bites.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cantseemeatall
πŸ“…︎ Aug 14 2019
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I just got my degree in Sky Diving.

I had to drop out to graduate.

πŸ‘︎ 74
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2019
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I surprised the judges at my last diving competition by performing a cannonball.

I made a huge splash

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/buckeyespud
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2019
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My wife drove our German car off the pier into the sea. The next day I went diving to look for it.

I got the Benz.

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wabisabi68
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2019
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I went to the veterinarian hospital the other day and was surprised to see that they had a small room reserved just to treat diving birds.

It was a little aukward.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2018
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I hate when I have to stop scuba diving

If makes me deep-pressed

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πŸ‘€︎ u/awesomeguy51303
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2018
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"What are your thoughts on sky-diving?"

"Well, I guess it's descent as a hobby"

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SimenZhor
πŸ“…︎ Sep 20 2018
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Went on a diving trip with strangers and found a sunken vessel. We're all pitching in to salvage and rebuild it.

I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2018
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I can't decide if I want to go sky diving

I'm still up in the air about it

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Haydn_Seek
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2017
🚨︎ report
Are pools safe for diving?

Well, it deep ends.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ericmc80
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2017
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The scuba diving boxer was an honest man

even when bribed he refused to take a dive.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Stroke_n_Smoke
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2017
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Why don't blind people go sky diving?

Because it scares the fuck out of the dogs

πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ“…︎ Sep 16 2017
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My dad cracks this one every time he tells me about his diving lessons.

"Why do divers fall backwards off the boat?"

"I don't know, why?"

"Because if they fell forwards, they'd still be in the boat."

I love you, dad, but Jesus...

πŸ‘︎ 315
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Draygn
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12 2014
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Scuba diving

Wife an I are watching a nature show and they are about to make a dive.

Me: Do you know why Scuba Diver's have to fall backwards out of the boat?

Her:No why?

Me: if they fell forward they would fall into the boat.

Her: wha... oh damnit! That was terrible

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TxJoker88
πŸ“…︎ Mar 11 2017
🚨︎ report
Why is it important to fall backwards off the boat when scuba diving?

Because if you fell forwards you'd still be on the boat

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/schaumann
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2016
🚨︎ report
Watching Olympic Synchronized Diving

Daughter: "Wow - they were not in sync."

Me: "I don't know. It looks like they went into a big sink."

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nub98
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2016
🚨︎ report
Brother: "I saw a seahorse scuba diving"

Dad: "Wow that's amazing, I didn't realise they had the technology."

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tooposhtofunction
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2014
🚨︎ report
I quit my job as a scuba diving instructor the first day I was hired.

Deep down, I realized it wasn’t for me.

πŸ‘︎ 80
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2019
🚨︎ report
I just quit my job as a scuba diving instructor.

Deep down, I realized it wasn’t for me.

πŸ‘︎ 100
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2019
🚨︎ report
Is the pool safe for diving?

It deep ends.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2019
🚨︎ report
Is the pool safe for diving?

It deep ends.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2019
🚨︎ report
Is the pool safe for diving?

It deep ends.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2019
🚨︎ report
Is the pool safe for diving?

It deep ends.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2019
🚨︎ report
Is this pool safe for diving?

It deep ends.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TightSurprise
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2019
🚨︎ report
Is the pool safe for diving?

It deep ends.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife drove our German car off the pier and into the sea. The next day I went diving and found it.

I got the Benz.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wabisabi68
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2019
🚨︎ report
Is this pool safe for diving?

It deep ends.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kaidendeck
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Is this pool safe for diving?

It deep ends.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/IDontClickAds
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2018
🚨︎ report
I can't decide if I want to go sky diving

I'm still up in the air about it

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Haydn_Seek
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2017
🚨︎ report
Are pools safe for diving?

It deep ends.

πŸ‘︎ 77
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πŸ‘€︎ u/slightlee_browne
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2016
🚨︎ report

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