A list of puns related to "Committed Suicide"
He lost the huile d'olive.
He didn't even leave a note
The coroner's report read that the student died on their terms.
At least he died on his own terms.
He just couldn’t handle the pressure.
Just imagine how surprised he was.
She came out with this one today:
"I don't know why he jumped in front of the train, but he must have had a real loco motive."
Never doing that again, I could've killed myself!
She says, “Absolutely not. I know you’re not gonna return it.”
Because he had a lot of problems.
To get to the other side.
a hypotenoose
I told her that’s the sixth time she’s said that today.
did they kill themselves a-ledge-dly?
It pulled the twigger.
then come in and tell us kids Santa Claus had committed suicide.
His life had no porpoise.
He couldn't handle the repercussions.
they all commit suicide because they have too many problems!
I'm going to be a dad in a week, training.
My grandfather, in his younger days, retired from his NASCAR dreams to do construction so he could raise a family. Fast forward 45 years to 1994. I was around 15. My grandfather, grandmother, her mother, and I were on the return trip from the Costco and liquor store just inside the no sales tax state of Oregon. My grandfather was, as usual, driving. He raced for Lincoln and they sponsored him so they gave him a really good lifetime discount. He drove a brand new Continental his entire life. He always raced down to Oregon as fast as he could and then tried beating his time while driving back. Suddenly, at about 140mph, a Pheasant committed suicide on the front end. We could see feathers occasionally come loose. Grandpa already had a couple minutes to make up. Needless to say, despite my grandma's insistance, stopping to investigate wasn't in the plans. When we got home, he was cussing an ill timed traffic light with a bored motorcycle cop parked on the sidewalk waiting for his target. My grandma and great grandma nearly died when, without batting an eye, grandpa pulled the Pheasant off the car, grabbed his Gerber knife, and stripped, cleaned, and threw the bird on the BBQ. I was in dying from laughter at this point. Grandma and my great grandma were dying from embarrassment. He offered them some and grandma angrily refused for the 3 of us, calling it road kill. Without skipping a beat, he calmly replied "This isn't road kill, it's Continental Wild Pheasant, Twice-Grilled."
I work a cancer hospital and schedule patients for surgery and procedures and stuff. I had this one couple who I knew I would like as soon as they sat down. The first thing the man says to me “you wanna hear a joke?” Me “ah, of course!” ....a few moments of silence go by... dad “did you hear about that actress? I think she played in miss congeniality? It was Reese something? She committed suicide.” Totally buying the story I go, “are you serious!? Reese Witherspoon!?” And with out a beat he says “No, with a knife.” And I looked at him for a few seconds to comprehend the joke and then lost it! I know this is probably old but it’s a classic.
He had a hard time committing suicide because he couldn't C4 himself.
He lost his huile d'olive
He lost his huile d'olive
Apparently he'd just completely lost the huile d'olive.
To get to the other side
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