A chemist froze himself at -273.15Β°C

everyone said he was crazy but he was 0K.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 118
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SlovenianGregor
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 13 2021
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

You Barium

πŸ‘οΈŽ 20
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ryan22000044
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 01 2021
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Did you hear about the new dating website for chemists?

It's called carbon dating.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 62
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Imholt11
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 27 2020
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A chemist plants a seed

He takes good care of it every day. He waters it and fertilizes the soil around it. As it becomes a big and healthy tree, the chemist thinks to himself: What a good chemist-tree.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/therderper123
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 15 2020
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Unbelievable...Just been to the chemist, asked the lady if she had something to clear up diarrhoea...

She gave me a mop.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 10 2021
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What did the chemist say when he dropped a bar of gold on his foot?

Au!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 51
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Salman_R
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 29 2020
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How does a chemist come out of the closet?

-"mom, dad, im made of gallium and yttrium"

-"what?"

-"im GaY"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/rozsaszin
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 28 2020
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A chemist froze himself at -273.15Β°C

Everyone thought he was crazy but he was 0K

Taken from u/HassanMehdi on r/technicallythetruth

πŸ‘οΈŽ 474
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Bruinsfan011
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 25 2020
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Two chemists walk into a bar. "I'll have H2O," says the first. "I'll have H2O, too," says the second.

The bartender gives them both water because he is able to distinguish the boundary tones that dictate the grammatical function of homonyms in coda position, as well as pragmatic context.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/NullVoidPointer
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 12 2020
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A duck walks into a chemist and says, "Do you have any lip balm?"

Chemist says, "Sure, that'll be 95 cents!"

Duck: "Put it on my bill please."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/El_Sidgio
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 22 2020
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Was at a dinner with a chemist when all of a sudden she became angry and starting throwing sodium chloride at me.

I'm pretty sure that's a salt.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 16
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/TheNeutralParty
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 10 2020
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I considered becoming a polymer chemist...

...but I thought the work would be too repetitive.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/klwill1192
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 21 2020
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What did the chemist say when they found two new isotopes of helium?

HeHe

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ashwynee
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 10 2020
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Do we cremate dead chemists?

No, we Barium.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/icemage27
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 10 2020
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How many Helium molecules does it take to make a chemist giggle?

Three.

HeHeHe

πŸ‘οΈŽ 55
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/dvdcrlsn
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 12 2020
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My dad is a chemist

He tells jokes periodically

Edit: spelling

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/mndaver24
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 06 2020
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What kind of letter does a lawyer send a chemist he wants to stop doing something?

A cesium and desist letter.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ICWhatsNUrP
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 10 2020
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How to tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber
πŸ‘οΈŽ 2k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Pegacornian
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 28 2019
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How do you dispose of a dead chemist's body?

You barium

πŸ‘οΈŽ 42
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/beebeepsheep
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 26 2020
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The chemist who created the periodic table was stumped during his process of developing the table. Suddenly, he realized:

He was missing a key element the whole time

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/AnthMaster7
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 12 2020
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What do you do with a chemist with Corona virus?

If you can't Curium or Helium you must Barium.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Cankles_of_Fury
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 11 2020
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Did you hear about the chemist who died?

Not even the best doctors could Helium.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 16
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Xakik
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 16 2020
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Why are chemists good problem solvers?

They have all the solutions.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 25
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/RedCakesYT
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 04 2020
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Did you hear about the chemist who was arrested?

He threw sodium chloride at his wife, that's a salt.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/zSilverFox
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 29 2018
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What would a chemist say to a corrupted hero?

You argon far from serving a noble cause

πŸ‘οΈŽ 24
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/1aim1
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 12 2020
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Lawyer, chemist and a statistician goes hunting

Lawyer, chemist and a statistician are out in a forest hunting for deer. After one hour of patiently waiting lawyer finally spots one. The lawyer shoots at a deer and misses half a meter to the left. The chemist takes a shot and misses half a meter to the right. Both are furious and dissapointed as they see the deer escape.

Chemist asks statistician - "why you didn't shoot ?"

Statistician replyes - "I didn't need to, we already shot him !".

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/CheeserLP
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 20 2019
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What's the difference between a chemist and plumber?

Ask them to pronounce "unionized."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 17
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/AustenGray
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 01 2019
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A chemist died

Press Fluorine to pay respects

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/CoruscareGames
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 22 2019
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So I accidentally killed a chemist the other day.

I asked my friend what to do. he said, "Just barium before the coppers catch us."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 14
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/greencash370
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 24 2019
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Why are Chemists good Psychotherapists?

Because they always have a good solution.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 40
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Marv1236
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 24 2019
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What did the chemist say after being tired of living a life full of sins?

"I must acetone for my sins"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/FlourineVsCopper
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 08 2019
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A chemist froze himself at -273Β°C.

People asked him if he was hurt but he said he was 0K.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 68
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/yalam_boi
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 23 2019
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Kids can become chemists after the primary schooling

Cuz they have the necessary ELEMENTARY education.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/evamPUNdit
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 11 2019
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When I have a problem, I go to a chemist

They usually have the solution.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 18
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/namingisdifficult5
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 11 2019
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A chemist froze himself to -273.15Β°C and everyone called him crazy but personally,

I think he was 0K

πŸ‘οΈŽ 19k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Niyi_M
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 11 2020
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

You Barium.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Saosin713
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 28 2020
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

You barium!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 53
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/DeletedForSpamm
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 27 2020
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What do you do when a chemist dies?

Barium

πŸ‘οΈŽ 36
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/speedyeddie
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 19 2020
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What do you do with a sick chemist?

If you cant helium Or curium You'll have to barium

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/BiscuitaBoyo
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 26 2020
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What do you do with a dead Chemist?

You Barium.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/OppositeWolf770
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 02 2020
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What did the chemist say when he dropped a bar of gold on his foot?

Au!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 137
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/shopcounterbill
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 02 2019
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What do you do with a poorly chemist?

Well, if you can't curium or helium, you have to barium

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Anassis
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 08 2019
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How can you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber?

Ask them to pronounce unionized.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 42
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/LaBiscuit
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 13 2019
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What do chemists do with the dead?

They Barium

πŸ‘οΈŽ 46
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/touchableuntouchable
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 25 2019
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How do you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber?

Ask them to pronounce "unionized".

πŸ‘οΈŽ 34
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/HunterMusicLover
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 19 2019
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How do you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber?

Ask them to pronounce unionized

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Amphibatron
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 03 2019
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What do you do with a sick chemist?

If you can't Helium, and you can't Curium, Barium.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/finestjuggler
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 31 2019
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Two chemists walk into a bar

The first one said," I'll have a glass of H2O" The second one says, " I want a H2O, too." The second chemist dies.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 91
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Lokwaileong2003
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 31 2018
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