Checkout Counter Puns

Clerk, attempting to add me to their email list: “Do you have a good email?”

Me: “It’s pretty good but I don’t know that I would brag about it. Thank you for asking.”

Clerk, as everyone around begins to laugh: “I love dad jokes. I need to call my dad”

My daughter tried to fain embarrassment but still tells that story at family gatherings.

and the checkout girl asks if I want a bag for them. I say "No thanks, I'll wear them out." She actually smiled. Yes, I'm a dad.

A man goes to the grocery store and buys 2 apples, a banana and an onion.

The lady at the checkout counter says, "You must be single".

The man says, "Wow, how did you know?"

The lady says, "Because you're ugly."

My dad and I were at the checkout counter:

Dad: "I love cider."

Me : " the only cider I like is 'Hot Dicken's'"

Dad: "Hot dicken's cider, never heard of it."

Cashier : groan

Dad: groan