Have you heard about the mystery writer who was a Chubby Checker Fan?

All of his stories had Twist endings.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sharksandwich70
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21 2020
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GROCERY STORE CHECKER: "Paper or plastic?" DAD: "Either, I’m bisacktual.”
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AshleyJack
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2017
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What do you call a girl who's very good at human chess and checkers?

Ingrid.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/spar_wors
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2019
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Did you hear about the microphone checker that got really drunk?

He had one two one two one two many.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2019
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The grocery store checker just asked if I wanted my milk in a bag.

I said "No! Leave it in the jug!" Can you imagine the mess?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/nyquill81
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2017
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What did the mic checker say to his girlfriend after she told him that he's her 'one'?

You're my one two, one two

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CosmicJoker96
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2018
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Dadjoked by the Costco receipt checker

Ran into Costco to grab a take and bake pizza for dinner. As I handed my receipt (the only item was the pizza) to the guy at the door, I tried to give a lame joke and he returned the favor.

Me: don't lose count now, this is a tough one

Costco guy: well that's awfully cheesy

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jonstradamus
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2014
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There is a board game that I stopped playing years ago.

But I don't like talking about my checkered past.

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πŸ“…︎ May 13 2021
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My friend doesn't want anyone else to know that he used to play board games a lot.

He's had a checkered past.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sodrohu
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2021
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I don’t care what all the SJW say, Winnie Harlow giving the checkered flag early at the Canadian Grand Prix absolutely was...

...a race issue.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SoDakZak
πŸ“…︎ Jun 11 2018
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dad, checkered napkins, cat.

During lunch, dad takes the blue/white checkered napkins, wraps it around the cat's head and proudly exclaims, "look! Yassir Aracat!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/chubaccatron
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2013
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What game do you play with a wombat?

Wom!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/wollphilie
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2015
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Dad joked by control systems prof

When asked why he always wears a checkered shirt he replied "I like to wear grid patterns so I always look like I'm plotting something"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ComicSansofTime
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2014
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I had dinner with Garry Kasparov last night...

I had dinner with Garry Kasparov last night and there was a checkered tablecloth. It took him two hours to pass me the salt.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2019
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I think the Indianapolis 400 is better than the Charlotte 400.

Did I just break the rules by being racist?

I hope nobody says I just colored outside the lines. Wait, did she say colored? But I guess everyone knows my checkered past.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Spotted_Lady
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2018
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Why did Harry Potter fail his O.W.L.S?

Because he didn't use a spell checker!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jamesdhanjal
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2016
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My dad got everyone at the airport today

So we're flying SouthWest airlines, which means that everyone has a boarding group A to D and a boarding number 1 to 60 to determine when everyone gets to board. As soon as they call boarding group A, my dad walks right up to the ticket checker with a big smile on his face and says, "Excuse me, but I believe I'm supposed to board before everyone else. She is confused for a moment and then he proudly holds up his ticket which has "B4" on it. Everyone kind of chuckled and I quickly buried my face in my hands.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/EvTheSmev
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16 2014
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[Pun Request] I need something punny for my email subject line!

Hey Redditors, I am helping to host a trade show and the theme is "Game Changer." One subject line I made was "Still Pawn-dering about -trade show-?" and I am trying to keep it along the lines of Chess, Checkers, and Scrabble, or other board games. Thank you in advance for reading and/or your help!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LoneWolfTraveler
πŸ“…︎ Oct 08 2014
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What are a man's favorite games?

Checker, chess, and poker.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DocDerz
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2017
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Our cashiers name tag read "Hello my name is Brie"

My dad leans over to to me and says "I think our checker is a little cheesy"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Awesomebra
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2015
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Dadjoke while working at the grocery store.

I have a job bagging groceries at a grocery store. A woman came up to the checkstand with a bunch of red, white, and blue plates. I said to her, "You must be feeling very platriotic. Both her and the checker just gave me a blank stare.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DuncanJJewell
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2014
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There is a board game that I stopped playing years ago.

But I don't like talking about my checkered past.

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πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2020
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