[Warning 18+]
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︎ Feb 16 2021
My programmer husband insists he has to be the one to change the channel
He has a lot experience working remote
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︎ Jan 24 2021
Showtime has far too many commercials on their channel.
Itβs just Shameless plug after Shameless plug.
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︎ Feb 09 2021
I bring my TV remote into every sports bar I go to so I can change the channel to whatever I want.
Itβs a real game changer
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︎ Jan 13 2021
Just finished reading a book on Channel swimming.
It was written by Francis Near.
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︎ Dec 14 2020
They actually made a KFC movie on the Hallmark channel
Itβs suppose to be a romance but donβt be surprised if thereβs some Fowl play.
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︎ Dec 09 2020
My wife was changing through channels on TV. She asked me if I skip, too.
I said, βNo, running is faster.β
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︎ Nov 29 2020
There was a television channel ran by pets, the weather forecast was on and inclement weather was being predicted...
High chance of it raining cats and dogs, howling winds, and a possible purricane.
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︎ Nov 15 2020
I can't tell you all Japanese history in one joke...
π︎ 5k
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︎ Oct 24 2020
Whats a good Spanish sports channel?
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︎ Sep 29 2020
If Smellevision existed, what channel would you smell wrestling?
π︎ 12
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︎ Aug 12 2020
From the yt channel dad how do I
Singing in the shower is all fun until soap gets in your mouth. Then it becomes a soap opera
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︎ Sep 22 2020
The ESPN Network should have a channel for drama and theatre
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︎ Jun 03 2020
My college friend got accepted to a social group by having to float out in the bay to mark a channel for their boats....
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︎ May 29 2020
Haven't been able to find the channel changer in a few days
It must be in a remote location
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︎ May 09 2020
I had a YouTube channel where I talked about famous painters, but YouTube took it down
I've been de-Monet-tized.
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︎ Apr 26 2020
The weatherman for our local TV channel broke both his arms and his legs in a car accident.
He is calling in from the hospital with his four casts.
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︎ May 29 2020
Channel Shark News
I wrote a little skit for my grandkids let's see how much I remember. CHUM 8 news Ted Hammerhead reporting with sky Chompter traffic report. Top story, a lone shark, who is a loan shark is alone in the dark making loans to sharks! There is a new place to gamble, the place is full of sharks who turn out to be card sharks playing card games with sharks on the cards. Imagune the dogs playing poker for this story, but it's sharks. The other reporter asks Ted Hammerhead how he did on his recent drivers test, Ted responds "nailed it". Crime scene where a clown has been killed and the Detective states, " No way a shark did this as they taste funny". On a comment about the victim. I never did the weather or figured out names for the other reporters we used to laugh and laugh at my stupid puns.
Edit: I can't spell fixed typos
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︎ Feb 15 2020
Channel 19 isn't working on my Tivo!
My worst fears confirmed. I have Novid-19!
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︎ Mar 15 2020
I really don't like my kids watching Little Einsteins on the Disney channel.
There's too much sax and violins.
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︎ Nov 30 2019
There's a show that consists only of people peeing.
You can see it on a number of streaming channels.
π︎ 19
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︎ Nov 07 2020
This just happened like 2 minutes ago and my dad is creased at himself
My mam saw a channel on the telly called the Deja Vu channel so she asked my dad what it was.
He replied with βIβm not sure but I swear Iβve seen it beforeβ
Heβs now pissing himself laughing and mam doesnβt get it
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︎ Aug 17 2020
So someone commented on my yt channel...
π︎ 5
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︎ Sep 07 2019
The actor that played Luke on the Disney channel original TV show βJessieβ died the day after Friday
So Saturdayβs really are for the Boyce
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︎ Sep 10 2019
Iβm going to start a YouTube channel where I critique bottled water...
Itβs an untapped market.
π︎ 12
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︎ Oct 19 2019
What YouTube channel does Momo have?
π︎ 2
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︎ Dec 03 2019
I'm selling a TV for $1, but it's broken and it's stuck on the highest volume.
That's a deal you can't turn down.
π︎ 2k
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︎ Jan 03 2020
If an ocean forms a channel through a body of land, and no one's around to hear it...
π︎ 8
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︎ Apr 20 2018
I just found an origami porn channel
π︎ 64
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︎ Jan 14 2019
Watching The Discovery Channel, I learned which garden organism has the dirtiest job...
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︎ Sep 12 2019
Thinking of starting a make-up channel
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︎ May 14 2019
News channels when Boris Johnson visits the Queen of the United Kingdom...
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︎ Jul 23 2019
I dont really like computer tech channels
π︎ 4
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︎ Aug 02 2019
Struggled to change the tv channel today because I couldnβt find the control
It was in a remote location
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︎ Mar 25 2019
I watch the History Channel a lot. Iβve become an expert, actually. Ask me anything,
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︎ Jul 04 2019
I created a YouTube channel where I (soflty) use my dog as a percussive instrument.
The channel is called "Heavy Petting."
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︎ Dec 08 2018
Multiple races were scheduled on the same channel on TV.
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︎ Apr 14 2019
Sports channel in the men's washroom...
π︎ 5
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︎ Mar 21 2018
I quit my job fixing controllers at the tv repair shop.
I wasnβt making remotely enough.
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︎ Jun 21 2020
Channeling The Beatles
So my wife and eldest daughter are in the dining room and Iβm in the kitchen. They are talking about parking a car at school, and getting the ticket that allows this from the office. I step into the room:
Me: βYou guys are talking about a ticket to park?β
Kid: βYeahβ
Me: βBut I thought Paul McCartney said it was a ticket to ride...β
Wife: βShut up dearβ
I look at the kid and point to my wife:
βShe donβt care.....β
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︎ Jan 15 2019
I discovered an origami porn channel!
But itβs paper view only.
π︎ 16
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︎ Jun 22 2018
I just found an origami porn channel
But itβs paper view only
π︎ 51
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︎ Sep 06 2018
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