So my son asked me about radioactivity.

I said to him:

Other than a few news channels the only thing on their is music.

👍︎ 9
💬︎
👤︎ u/Fulback
📅︎ Feb 21 2019
🚨︎ report
I also got dadjoked by my son this week. Twice. He's 12.

1st - "Hey dad, how come nobody can come up with a good, stable news channel on tv?"

"What do you mean?"

"Every one you watch say their news is breaking!"


2nd - We were having dinner and my 15 year old mentioned that something or other 'really sucked!'

The 12 year old responded with "not really, that doesn't really suck, you know what does?"

... silence

"A vacuum cleaner, that really sucks!"

👍︎ 38
💬︎
👤︎ u/FerretFarm
📅︎ Nov 10 2015
🚨︎ report
[Request] Need puntastic suggestions related to flail!

Hi punterific people!

I'm a YouTuber that loves puns and use puns regularly in my videos when I play games. I'm having some new graphics donr for my channel and I want to change my 'saying' to reflect the punny part of... Well.. Me :)

The new art depicts my avatar (Game kNight) weilding a shield and a flail - and I want the saying to reflect something in that regard. I persistently play games to win (as if anyone did otherwise) and don't like failing (like most other gamers?);

Thoughts up until now: Flailure is not an option - for me! (but for the enemies I face is implied) Flailing is an option (because facing me will get you flailed) I will not flail you!

Hope you can help me out!

👍︎ 3
💬︎
👤︎ u/Shadewarp
📅︎ Mar 11 2017
🚨︎ report
Mom got me while watching news

Its been exceptionally windy today, so windy that it blew over one of our plant pots and broke it. The local news channel was discussing it. Then my mom quipped "Why aren't they in front of our house? We have breaking news right here!"

👍︎ 7
💬︎
👤︎ u/neozan
📅︎ Jun 10 2015
🚨︎ report
Hail joke

Referring to the news channel's explanation of the tornado warning in Sacramento, CA, my dad yelled sarcastically from downstairs:

"Half dollar sized hail!...how much does a piece of hail cost?!"

I could practically hear the look on his face when I didn't respond.

👍︎ 12
💬︎
📅︎ Mar 27 2014
🚨︎ report
My dad's brilliant macabre one liner

So my dad was talking to an acquaintance of ours, who is a landlord. My dad's acquaintance said he went in to check on one of his tenants and found him dead in his Lay-Z-Boy watching TV, remote still in hand and T.V still running. My dad's response on hearing this bit of news "Welp, I bet he wasn't watching the Life Channel"

👍︎ 8
💬︎
📅︎ May 30 2014
🚨︎ report
Sitting at the train station bar right now...

And the bartender asks these two old guys, across from me, "Is it okay if I change this TV right now?" (Meaning she was changing the channel)

The one says, "Yeah! Is the new one gonna be a 62 or 70 inch?"

Dad joking strangers? Especially when I'm drunk? All my yes.

👍︎ 8
💬︎
📅︎ Feb 21 2014
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.