Did you hear about the blind carpenter?
He picked up the hammer and saw.
(my dad told this all the time. I am continuing on with the tradition...)
When the local carpenter was asked what it was like when he fell through a window?
He said,” All I felt was pane.”
I told my carpenter not to carpet my steps.
He gave me a blank stair.
A sperm donor, Carpenter, and Julius Caesar walked into a bar
... He came, he saw, he conquered
What did the carpenter do after he wasn't satisfied with his One Night Stand?
What did the carpenter say as they were being arrested?
What is the cannibal carpenter’s favorite measurement?
How a carpenter describes his personality on a dating app
What do bakers, carpenters, and horses have in common?
They all like a good grain
Why couldn’t the carpenter and the lumberjack get along
They saw things differently
Jesus was known to be a carpenter, but I've always gotten the feeling that he would make a great attorney.
He was quite the cross-examiner.
What did the Mexican carpenter have for lunch?
I auditioned to be a carpenter’s hand.
What is it called when a bunch of carpenters and masons on the cruise?
What does the carpenter tell his wife before going to bed?
What did the depressed carpenter say?
Did you hear about the carpenter who murdered someone at work?
They say he hit the nail on the head
Did you see those carpenters at the party last night?
They really knew how to raise the roof.
How does a carpenter catch a taxi?
What thing does tech support and carpenters have in common?
They both work with routers on a regular basis.
My friend Izzy wanted to furnish her new apartment, so I took her to furniture store owned by 3 carpenters, all named Paul.
Two of them were still apprentices and learning the trade, but the third was a master at the craft and was also my friend. They were currently busy in the workshop working on a set of great wooden letters which spelled "BEAST".
"Is your friend Paul the one working on the misshapen B?" Izzy asked.
"Nope, that's not him.", I replied.
"So is it the one working on the crooked E?"she responded.
"Most certainly not!" I answered. I finally saw him and exclaimed, "On ST is the best Paul, Izzy!"
Who was the worlds first carpenter?
Eve, because she made Adams banana stand.
My old job at the carpenters
I was working for a carpenter as work experience. He just got me to move planks from one pile to another
and woodn't you know it but I got pt having enough pretty board of not having actual qualitree experience.
I ended up getting so frustrated that I insulted him till I ran out of insults and was stumped. That's the story of how I decided to leaf being a builder behind me and branch out into new careers.
I hired a carpenter, but she'll only work on the walls, ceiling joists, doorframes, and windows.
Apparently floors are beneath her.
Why was Jesus a bad carpenter?
He refused to cut corners.
I asked my father if he knew any finish carpenters
He replied "Nope, only Canadian carpenters and a couple of Americans"
What do you call a carpenter without his saw?
I see said the blind carpenter
As he reached for his hammer and saw.
I tried to be a carpenter...
but I couldn't make the cut.
A carpenter was tired of people knocking down a symbol of his country. What did he have to do?
Make a stand for the flag.
I had to follow my dream of being a carpenter, even though I always end up injured.
I’m always one step ahead... like how a carpenter makes...
My father is a carpenter...
Everytime he asks me a question and I give a good answer he says "You hit the nail on the head son." I always take that as a dad joke.
When I work with him and need to nail a board he says "Good answer"
Did you guys hear about the blind carpenter?
He picked up a hammer and saw
A sperm, a carpenter, and julius ceaser walk into a bar
He came, he saw, he conquered
My father was a blind carpenter
until he picked up his hammer and saw.
A sperm donor, a carpenter and Julius Ceasar walk into a bar.
He came, he saw, he conquered.
A sperm donor, a carpenter, and Julius Caesar walk into a bar.
He came, he saw, he conquered.
A sperm donor, a Carpenter and Julius Caesar walk into a bar
He came, He saw and He conquered
A sperm donor, a carpenter, and Julius Caesar walk into a bar.
He came, he saw, he conquered.
Have you ever heard the story of the blind carpenter?
He picked up his hammer and saw.
What do you call a carpenter who loses his tools?
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