Capped Puns

He's this country's most notorious cereal killer

An invalid

I walk kinda funny now but my farts smell great!

Because it's all caps

He said it was acci-dental.

So yeah I got into a car accident during college and I wanted to commemorate that on my grad cap. My mom won't let me put my mri, "you should put something positive on your cap, not something negative" so yeah a back pun is the next best thing I could think of putting on there.

I can’t say the same for his felony.

I can't belive how bold he was

One Buck.

“You stay here, I’ll go on a-head.”

He looks at the peddler and goes, "wow, that guy really has a lot on his head!"

WASHING-TON

It’s ok, Toucan play that game.

Now police are looking for a man with a price on his head.

It’s called plant yourself on the couch.

I was confused, but they seemed friendly. I told them what was going on, and they said: open the gas cap. One by one, each bee flew into the tank, and to my astonishment the gas gage went from empty to full. The bees said: start the car. So, I did and it ran. I asked them: what did you put in the tank? Bee pee.

There's no Plate like Chrome for the Hollandaise.

A fungi

I thought he was pulling my leg, but when I asked him, he told me "Yeah man it's true, no cap."

My dad turns to me and says, "Oops, Premature Ecapulation."

Skipper of course.

I’m graduating with my Masters in MIS (Management Information Systems) and am seeking suggestions for punny graduation cap mottos or sayings that I could use related to my MIS Degree. Thanks!!

I’M NOT UPSET, BUT DON’T KNOW HOW TO SHOW IT.

It hurt like hell, but my farts smell great.

I can barely walk but my farts smell lovely.